PODCAST TRANSCRIPT | EPISODE 426: THE FLOURISHING MOTHER, PT 8
LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell
EPISODE 426: THE FLOURISHING MOTHER, PT 8
The flourishing mother orders her home. She labors diligently to make her home a delightful place for her family.
Announcer: Welcome to the podcast, Life to the Full, with Nancy Campbell, founder and publisher of Above Rubies, a magazine bringing strength and encouragement to families across the world.
Nancy Campbell: Hello, lovely ladies! So wonderful to be with you again. I’m thinking of you in your homes. I know every one of you is doing something different, facing a different challenge, or enjoying some wonderful thing together as a family.
But I just love to pray this Scripture over you and your home. I love this Scripture. It’s found in Deuteronomy 11:12. It’s talking about the land of Israel, the land that flows with milk and honey. God says: “A land which the LORD thy God careth for: the eyes of the LORD thy God are always upon it, from the beginning of the year even unto the end of the year.” I pray that scripture over your home and over your family. May the eyes of the Lord be upon you, caring for you, from the beginning of the year to the end of the year. Amen.
Well, the other day, I read these few words on the internet. They really resonated with me. I’d like to read them to you. They’re pretty radical. Do you mind if I read something radical? Well, I say a lot of radical things, don’t I?
But these are the words. “It is barbaric to separate mothers from their babies so that mothers can pursue a career goal. I want you to understand how demented feminism is to mothers. It has convinced women to violate all of their natural affections and biological responses. Our descendants are going to look back at this point of history, where more babies were killed through abortion, and where moms abandoned their children for a paycheck. And they will call it utterly insane.”
And I believe that’s true. We are really living in an insane, well yes, an insane society, where everything is turned upside down. In fact, Isaiah 29:16 tells us about this. It says: “You’ve turned things upside down.” And we have, because God’s plan for male and for female is being discarded today.
His plan for us as females, as mothers, all of you know who are listening, is that God created us in such a very special way. He created us with a womb. He created us with breasts. He created us for the purpose of bringing forth the godly seed, His children into this world, and not only for this world, but for eternity.
This is God’s plan, and yet, today’s society has turned it upside down. It is true, these words that I read that women are discarding and putting aside their natural biological responses, how they were created, and how they are enabled, and they’re just putting them aside, discarding them to go out into a whole different realm, into the career world, into the man’s world. They are leaving behind what God has planned for them. It’s all upside down.
Even in the church, which is a very sad thing. We go to Titus 2, and we read there of God’s heart, His plan for the older women to teach the younger women, and to teach them. What does He want to teach them? He wants us to teach them to love their husbands, and to love their children, and to be keepers at home. To be a keeper at home is to be one who is there in the home, guarding the home, being in the heart of the home.
And yet, there are so many women in the church who love God. Yes, they love God. They’re born again. But no one has taught them. There’s no older woman teaching them. Instead, they’re listening to the voices in society which woo them away from the home, and woo them out into this career world, which is, according to God’s Word and His plan, upside down.
In fact, I read another little post. It says if you talk about what is a woman in the world, well, wow! People will wonder what you're talking about. But then, if you talk in the church about a woman’s place is in the home, well that will get them upset. It’s amazing how the word “woman” can get so many people upset today. Isn’t that amazing?
WHY DO WOMEN WANT TO REJECT HOW GOD MADE THEM?
There is such power, dear ladies, in womanhood. Satan knows the power of our womanhood, and our motherhood, and our homeness, and our wombness, and our femineity, all these things which are part of who we are as a woman. And yet, they even make women upset! How is that, that who we really are, and how God biologically created us, makes women upset? And yet, they are women.
This is how much things are turned upside down. I believe it’s time in this society to get things back the right way. Of course, I know that most of you who are listening today, you are walking in the ways of God. I want to encourage you, dear mothers. Do not be ashamed of who you are, and of being a mother in the home, and embracing children, and embracing your homeness and your wombness, for this is who you are. You need never be ashamed of it, because it’s who you are.
For those who reject this, they are the ones who should be ashamed, because they reject who God created them to be. What a terrible thing, to go through life, and never fulfill your destiny as to who you were functioned and created to be!
We will just continue in our podcast to you, of “Life to the Full,” of encouraging you and inspiring you in this wonderful way that God has planned.
We are currently talking about THE FLOURISHING MOTHER. We’re continuing No. 10, THE FLOURISHING MOTHER HAS COMMAND OF HER HOME.
We are in the middle of going through the acrostic of ORDER because God loves order in the home. We have talked about “O” ORGANIZING.
Now today, we’re up to . . .
R ROUTINE
It is important, I believe, to keep a routine for your home. We mentioned last week how some mothers are more apt to keeping to schedules and others are more laid back. We all have our own personalities, but I think even for those who are laid back, and maybe I’m a little bit like that . . . maybe I’m in the middle, I think.
But we also need to have a routine, a basic routine, to keep order in the home, and to keep command of your home. Because if we don’t have that routine, the home can get out of order, and we really don’t know where we’re going. We do need order, and we do need routine, and we do need goals to know where we’re going.
There should be a certain time when we all get up in the morning, although maybe people will get up . . . different ones in the home will get up at different times, because they’re different ages. That doesn’t really matter. But we need to all be ready for breakfast.
That should be at a certain time so that we can all have breakfast together. Of course, that will be different in every home. Find what is best for your home, and just make it a routine, so children know they’ve got to be up in time for breakfast. OK, and then, of course, we have our family devotions together to start the day with God. If we don’t all get up for breakfast, how will we be ready to have that time with God? So, it is a good thing to do that.
I do believe, of course, if we happen to get our children up by a certain time, well, they need to be in bed by a certain time. I love that old adage, “Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.” I do believe it’s still true today, although it doesn’t often fit in with the lifestyle today, especially of teens, who love to stay up late, and later, and later. But if they can’t get up in the morning, well, I think you've got to work on getting them bed at a certain hour so they’re ready to get up to start the day. That is most important.
D DISCIPLINE
Disciplining our lives starts with us as mothers. We have to discipline our own lives. We can’t discipline our children’s lives unless we live a disciplined life ourselves, which, of course, also is according to your personality, and the running of your home. But in it all, have certain disciplines, because discipline is part of life. If we have no discipline in our lives, we won’t really accomplish anything. An undergirding of discipline helps us to accomplish so much in our lives.
I have my own disciplines, and you will have yours, but make sure you have them. My discipline is to get up early. I like to get up very early and wait upon the Lord and have my personal time with the Lord. I think I talked about that last time too. You can do that in seasons, because when you've got seasons of little babies and little ones, it’s not always easy to do that. God totally understands. So, you also work with your season. I like to do that.
And then we have breakfast at a certain time, and then our family devotions, starting the day with God. We start our devotions at eight o’clock. For some homes, it may start a lot earlier; some maybe a bit later. But you make your time.
So, you have to discipline your life to keep to those times, because all kinds of things can happen. But you keep to those disciplines. As you have those disciplines, then you will teach your children, little by little, to also have those disciplines. Little ones are not going to know much about disciplining of their lives. But as they grow, little by little, you will teach them.
MAKE YOUR BED
A good thing to teach them is, as soon as your children are able, you teach them to make their beds. Make their beds, yes. Even young children can make their bed, and they should learn to do that before breakfast, before they come out for breakfast, so the duty is done for the day.
Well, there are some people who do say that you should air your bed before making it because that can be healthy. If you are a believer in that, you could maybe wait until after breakfast and devotions, and then that’s the first thing you do. The first job that you attack is making the bed. But whatever, we need to make our beds in the morning.
Now, I know there are some families where beds don’t get made. But can I encourage you, ladies, that this is a wonderful discipline. And also, not only a discipline for yourself, but also a discipline for your children to learn to make their beds. Studies show that starting off with a job accomplished first thing in the morning is a very powerful thing in your life.
In fact, there is a book called Make Your Bed. Have you ever heard of it? I read this book. Make Your Bed: Little Things Can Change Your Life and Maybe the World, written by Admiral William McRaven. He says there are ten things that he learned when he was training as a Navy Seal. The first one is “make your bed.”
He says that the discipline of making his bed first thing when he got up, and making it beautifully, making it straight, making it look right was the first job . . . It was something that he accomplished. He’d done that and then he could go on to accomplish many things throughout the day.
I read a Yale psychology study that found that people who make their beds daily may live up to 19% longer than those who don’t. Well, that’s very interesting, isn’t it? They believe it’s likely due to the effect that comes from making your bed—reduced stress, better sleep, healthier habits. An unmade bed is one of the most visible signs of disorder. A made bed signals order to your brain, lowering your cortisol levels, and creating a calmer mental state.
So, that’s a good discipline. Good one to teach your children. And it’s so wonderful to look in bedrooms and see all the beds made! It brings an order to the home. To look at unmade beds, and then when there are unmade beds, it’s usually untidy bedrooms. It just brings chaos to the home. So, there’s a little discipline you can start with.
I like to keep with the disciplines of our dinnertime or lunchtime (approximately) and the evening meal. And the disciplines of keeping order, cleanliness, tidiness in the home. I know each one of you find your own way in that. You work out your own plan for doing that. But you've got to work out your plans, because we must keep our homes in order. God has given this task to us as women.
As 2 Timothy 4:15, is it? Let me just check it here and I’ll take you to this Scripture. Or was it 1 Timothy? 1 Timothy 5:14! That’s it, yes. Got the reference correct: “I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house.” Yes, that word there, “guide the house” means to rule and manage the home. We have a responsibility to manage our homes so that we give no “occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.”
One of the things I love to do in our home is that I have Preparation Day. Did you know that Preparation Day is mentioned in the Bible, with a capital “P”? It’s actually Friday, when God gave this day to His people the Israelites, preparing them for Shabbat. So, every Friday is called “Preparation Day” when they prepare for Shabbat when they will rest, because God gave six days for work, and one day for rest.
He gave them this day, when they could clean their houses from top to bottom, and do all the extra cleaning. We do basic cleaning every day, but it’s good to have one day when you clean from top to bottom, and clean extra things, so everything is shining and sparkling. You are ready for the rest day.
Did you know that if you don’t have a Preparation Day, you can never have a rest day? Because there will always be things to do the next day! But if you have a Preparation Day, with a real, full cleaning that day, and cooking that lasts for tomorrow, then you don’t have to cook, woo! Then, that one day, you can sit back and do nothing, hopefully!? And relax!
But actually, it’s very interesting, because it’s mentioned in the Bible. It’s amazing, isn’t it, that God gives all these practical things for our lives. I didn’t know about Preparation Day for, well, I’ve known it for many years now. But for many years, I didn’t know about it. And yet, it was in the Bible!
You can look it up on my website if you just put in “Preparation Day.” I do have some writing about that that you can read. That’s a good thing too. So, that’s another routine, not the daily routine, but a weekly routine, because we have daily routines and we have weekly routines.
I love another beautiful old saying. Sometimes people have this one hanging on their wall also. It says:
“The beauty of the home is order.
The blessing of the home is contentment.
The glory of the home is hospitality.
The crown of the home is godliness.”
E ENCOURAGE
To keep a home running smoothly is easier said than done because children lag behind, and they disobey, and they complain. It’s easy for us to get nagging them. But what you've got to do, ladies, is to encourage your children with the helping of the home, and getting them into the routine of the home, is to encourage them.
Children will do so much more with encouragement than they will by nagging at them and getting onto them all the time. We often feel as though that’s what we’re doing all the time, getting onto them, because we’ve told them to do something, and they haven’t done it. So, we’re getting onto them again.
But encouragement is such a wonderful thing. Encouragement was one of the beautiful things I used in raising our children. In fact, I believe encouragement is the soil in which we grow our children to their full development and destiny. We do it by encouraging. Become an encouraging mother, always encouraging your children.
I think it’s not wrong to even have some “carrots” and rewards for your children which will inspire them to do things. You can make a schedule and put it on the fridge, or somewhere on the wall of all the jobs each child has, from the oldest down to the youngest, with little things for the youngest to do.
But then you can have spaces to put stars. So, OK, if each child, when they do their job with a smile, happily, cheerily, they get a star. Or maybe, when they get up in the morning, they get up on time, and they come out to the breakfast table with a smile on their face, oh wow! You can give them another star! When you notice that they’re doing things with a song, and doing things cheerily, and doing it even without reminding, well, give them a star!
And then, at the end of the week, you can count up the stars. The one who gets the most stars can get a prize. Make sure it’s something really special. It doesn’t have to be too expensive, but some little prize you know that they will love. These things encourage them to do the things you want them to do, and then they get into the habit of doing them. So, remember to do these things with encouragement. Keeping order in your home, do it with encouragement. Amen?
And also, by example. Yes, that’s another “E” isn’t it? EXAMPLE! How do your children see you doing the things that have to be done in the home, that you are doing? Of course, as your children grow, you're sharing the load. That’s a wonderful thing about a growing family, having more children in your family. There are more to carry the load. As the children get bigger, they’re able to do more and more.
But they’re going to do it the way they see you doing it. Do they see you doing things with a smile, doing things with a song, doing things happily, cheerily, and also mightily, with all your heart? Because the Word of God says that everything we do, we’re to do it mightily, with all our hearts. We’re to do it, giving glory to God. Show your children by example how you want them to do it. Amen?
All right. Before I go on to the last one, “R,” I do want to go back and give you a few Scriptures about our getting the jobs done in the home and working in the home, because to keep our home in order, we do have to work. We can’t sit around on the sofa and be lazy. Nothing happens with laziness. Everything happens with diligence, and with work.
Actually, I really just noticed today, as I was reading this. We go back to the very beginning. In fact, everything we find in the beginning. The book of Genesis is so amazing because all the principles of life and the beginning are there. Even WORK starts in Genesis, and it starts before the fall.
When I was a child, I used to think, “Oh, work came in after sin came in and that’s how we got work” because I didn’t like work as a child. But no, no, work came before ever man sinned. Work came in the Garden of Eden where everything was beautiful. Yes, work came with the creation of man.
And so, we read here, in Genesis 2:5, and this is where God had been creating the world. It says: “And every plant of the field before it was in the earth, and every herb of the field before it grew: for the LORD God had not caused it to rain upon the earth, and there was not a man to till the ground.” So, there was not a man to till the ground. That word “till” is the word “work.” There was no one to work the ground.
That’s the first time the word “work” is mentioned. That word “work,” get it lovely ladies? Children, are you listening? Any children listening? The word “work,” that word comes in the Garden of Eden where everything was beautiful, and where there was no sin, and where it was such a delight to live.
But at this time there was no work yet. There was no one there to till the ground because God hadn’t created man yet. Work came with man. God created man to do the work because He needed work done. God needed work done in this world that He had created. He needed work done in the garden that He had created, but He couldn’t get it done until He created man. So now, MAN AND WORK GO TOGETHER.
Here we are, in our homes, creating order, creating a beautiful home, like the Garden of Eden, because God wants us to create homes like the very first home which was called the Garden of Eden. The word “Eden” means “delight.” The first home was a prototype of all homes to come. So, lovely ladies, God wants us to create a home of delight where we delight to live in our home in our homes.
Everyone delights to live . . . delight to live in our home, because we’re creating it to be delightful. Our husband comes home, and, oh, he just delights to be in the home. And the children just love being in the home, because this is what we’re creating, lovely ladies. But it takes work to create it. And God created this beautiful world. But then, He had to create man to work in this world that He created, and work in the home that He created.
We go to verse 15 of the same chapter. And now, well, first of all, we’d better go to verse 8: “And the Lord God planted a garden.” Well, first of all, why don’t we go to verse 7: “And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.”
Verse 8: and the next thing, “The Lord God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed.”
And then we go to verse 15: “And the LORD God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.” The word “dress it” is the same Hebrew word as “till the ground.” “Dress the garden.” Well, those are the King James words but the word in the Hebrew literally means “work.” That’s what it means. Work. OK? And the word is abad, “to work, to labor, to serve, to serve another.”
Well, who are we serving? We’re serving the Lord God who created this world and this earth. He created the first home, and now He is wanting us to create this delightful home. But it’s going to take work. Isn’t that amazing? Work. Yes.
So, we need to embrace that work is wonderful. Work is a delight. Work is great, because it accomplishes amazing things. As we work in our homes, we can make them a delight. We can’t live in delight when we live in a messy, untidy home. But when we keep it nice, and we have order and routine, we can then live and enjoy this delightful home. So, God has planned it all this way.
All right. Let me just give you a few other Scriptures. You know there are so any Scriptures in the Word of God about working and diligence and laziness, aren’t there? There are so many.
Oh, I like Proverbs 13:4 in the New Living Translation: “Lazy people want much, but get little. But those who work hard will prosper.”
Let’s just look at few others. We won’t go through them all because there are so many. But it’s a good study to do for your children. Look up all the Scriptures about diligence and then look up all the Scriptures about laziness. You know, sometime during one of your family devotions, family Bible reading, you can read these Scriptures. Read them to your children. Sometimes you can make memory verses for them, so they get to know the Scriptures about what God says about all this.
Proverbs, let’s see. We’ll go to Proverbs 10:4. Let’s look at this one: “He becometh poor that dealeth with a slack hand: but the hand of the diligent maketh rich.”
Let’s go over to Proverbs 13:4: “The soul of the sluggard desireth, and hath nothing: but the soul of the diligent shall be made fat.”
Let’s look at Proverbs 18:9: “He also that is slothful in his work is brother to him that is a great waster.”
Let’s see what else I’ve got here. Let me go over to Proverbs 24:33. Oh, let me start at verse 30: “I went by the field of the slothful, and by the vineyard of the man void of understanding; And, lo, it was all grown over with thorns, and nettles had covered the face thereof, and the stone wall thereof was broken down. Then I saw, and considered it well: I looked upon it, and received instruction. Yet a little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to sleep: So shall thy poverty come as one that travelleth; and thy want as an armed man.”
So, we read that all this happens to the slothful. Everything begins to break down and become wasted.
Proverbs 26:14: let’s see what this says. Oh my, I used to be really challenged by this Scripture, especially when I was a young person: “As the door turneth upon his hinges, so doth the slothful upon his bed.”
I looked that Scripture up in another translation. Here it is: “As the door swings back and forth on its hinges, so the lazy person turns over in bed.” Isn’t that easy to do? The alarm goes. You know it’s time to get up, and you say, “Oh no!” And you just put the blankets over your head and turn back into your bed. It’s so easy to do that.
This Scripture tells us that’s like a lazy person. There’s a door that swings back and forth. The lazy person, instead of getting up, putting his feet out on the floor, just puts his head back into bed again. But we have to use discipline and get up at a reasonable time to begin to start the day, and make everything happen. Otherwise, everything falls apart, doesn’t it?
Well, our time is going. I wonder if I can just . . . Maybe I’ll just finish on that Scripture in Genesis 2:15: “And the LORD God took the man, and put him into the garden [home] to dress it and to keep it.” The work “keep” means “to guard.” So, He gave the first man and woman in the garden two things: to work, and to guard.
The most amazing thing is that over in Titus 2:3-5 in the New Testament, we get the same message. The Scripture there, one of the things that the older women must teach is to be keepers at home. Some translations of the Word of God of that Scripture translate it “workers at home.”
That comes from a certain translation, a certain early manuscript, from two words, oikos, “home,” and then the word ergon, “to work.” So, it is a correct translation, “workers at home.” It’s giving the picture of working in the home, to make it a delight, to keep it in order.
But then, there are other translations that say that we are guardians of the home, the same as Genesis 2:15, to work and to guard. From another early manuscript, they get the Greek work oikos, “home,” and ouros, “to guard.” And so, back in the very beginning, it was to work and to guard. Now, in the New Testament, the word to mothers is the same again, to work and to guard, to watch over our home, to guard it with all our hearts.
So, lovely ladies, there we go. This is what our beautiful Word, our living Word from God, reminds us. Be encouraged today, OK? You’ve got lots of work to do. Well, embrace it, rejoice. It’s wonderful. Work will just help to keep your home in order and make it a delight. And don’t forget to guard it as well. That’s a big part that God has given you as a mother, to guard and to watch over your home.
“Dear Father, we thank You so much for all the reminders we have in Your Word. Right at the very beginning, and then we go right over to the New Testament. You remind us again that, Lord, we are workers in our home, and we also are keepers of the home, keeping it from any intrusion of the enemy, guarding and watching over it.
“Bless every precious, lovely mother today, Lord God. Bless them as they take on their roles of working and guarding in their homes. In the Name of Jesus, Amen.”
Blessings from Nancy Campbell
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