MY HUSBAND’S HELPER

Part 7 (The Strengths I Bring to my Marriage and Family)

“Who can find a wife with strength of character? She is far more precious than jewels”
(Proverbs 31:10 Fenton).

Today, we look at the last two points in this series asbout the strengths we bring to our marriage.

9. STRONG TO EMBRACE MOTHERHOOD

Perhaps the most beautiful strength we bring to our marriage is motherhood. We remember that God calls us an ezer kenegdo, ezer meaning “strong helper” and kenegdo “counterpart, corresponding to him.” In other words, God made us with strengths opposite to our husbands. God ordained the husband to be the leader and provider of the home. He didn’t need two leaders or two providers. Instead He created us to be the heart of the home--to bring to birth and mother children in the home.

God created us physically for this task. He gave to the female a womb and breasts for this very purpose. He created us innately for this task. He divinely put within every female an instinctive desire to mother and nurture. This is who we are as a female.

To deny who we are as female is to deny our greatest strength. To resist motherhood for other pursuits pulls down the home instead of building it up (Proverbs 14:1). To reject motherhood denies the very purpose of marriage. God created a male and female to bring forth children in His image. Therefore, homosexuality is an abomination to God. It denies God’s plan for marriage to be fruitful and bring forth His children.

Motherhood is a mighty strength. Society doesn’t tell you this, but Satan knows it. That’s why he attacks motherhood and seeks to deceive women about this highest role God has given to them. Satan fears godly mothers—mothers who know who they are, who know the power of their calling, and who understand their eternal value of mothering. Mothers who embrace the children God has planned for them from before the foundation of the world and who stay home to mother, nurture, and train these children to be mighty men and women of God. There’s no mightier task in the whole of the nation! Satan doesn’t have a chance to get a hold of these children. He loses.

Are you bringing your greatest strength to your marriage? Embrace it with all your heart. It’s not an easy task. It’s not for the fainthearted. But remember, we are talking about the STRENGTHS we bring to our marriage, not the weaknesses!

Proverbs 31:10 (Fenton) states: “Who can find a wife with STRENGTH OF CHARACTER? She is far more precious than jewels.” This is a correct translation. The word “virtuous” in the KJV is chayil and is translated “valiant” in other Scriptures.

10. STRONG TO EMBRACE HOME-KEEPING

God does not intend the husband to keep the home—to manage the home and do the household tasks. His function is to go out and provide for the home. We lovingly tend to the home and “keep the home fires burning.”

I know you love it when your husband helps you in the home. But please don’t have an entitlement mentality and expect him to do it. Be grateful. Always remember to thank him for any help he gives you for he is helping you in your role in addition to his role!

God wants you to be queen of your home. To rule and reign. It is within every woman to want to take dominion. It is instinctive. But there is where so many women are deceived by the enemy. Instead of reigning in their home, they are brainwashed to think the home is insignificant, and instead leave them home to find another place to rule and reign. They move out of the sphere God ordained for them. Reverently and repentingly read Jude 1:6).

1 Timothy 5:14 says: “I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.” The phrase “guide the house” is oikodespoteo and means “to rule and manage the home.” It doesn’t say we rule our husband, but the domain God has given to us—our mothering, our household tasks, our garden, and all the amazing things we can accomplish in our home.

You must be strong to do this today You must stand against the tide. Stand against the negative remarks of family members and friends. Stand against the pressure of society that woos you out of the home. Stand against the unbelief Satan puts in your mind that you cannot survive without leaving the home to go to work.

What God do you believe in? A god who can only provide for one or two children? Or the God of the universe, the King of kings and Lord of lords who can quite easily provide for the children He sends to us.

You may like to go back over the previous devotions to read again the ten strengths we bring into our marriage. Let’s bring them in STRONGLY.

Be blessed, NANCY CAMPBELL
www.aboverubies.org

PRAYER:

“I thank you, dear Father for your perfect and divine plan for my life. You created me to be a mother and a nurturer. Your ordained me to be queen of my home and make it a beautiful resting place for my husband and family. Please strengthen me in this great calling. Amen.”

AFFIRMATION:

I do not apologize for being a mother. I am in the perfect will of God.
I do not apologize for having the children God wants me to have. I am fulfilling God’s ultimate plan for our marriage.
I do not apologize for staying home with my children. I am strengthening our marriage.

MY HUSBAND’S HELPER

Part 6 (The Strengths I Bring to my Marriage and Family)

“Beauty is something internal that can’t be destroyed.
Beauty expresses itself in a gentle and quiet attitude which God considers precious.”
(1 Peter 3:4 GW).

8. STRONG TO EMBRACE FEMININITY

God has given to you the strength of femininity. He gave your husband the strength of masculinity. We are not a true helper to our husbands when we try to be masculine or take on his masculine mantle. He doesn’t need another person like him, he needs a woman--a feminine woman. I believe we should embrace our femininity in every area of life—speech, dress, deportment, and demeanor.

Men are naturally stronger than women with usually 50 percent more brute strength. They are built to have more muscle, broader shoulders, and stronger physique to lift heavy weights, do hard work, provide, and protect.

I know I am at odds with the feminist and liberal thinking of today, but I do not believe that women should be “on the ground combat” along with men. Did you know that since January 2016 all military jobs are now open to women? Obama’s Defense Secretary, Ashton B. Carter stated: “They’ll be allowed to drive tanks, fire mortars, and lead infantry soldiers into combat. They’ll be able to serve as Army Rangers and Green Berets, Navy SEALs, Marine Corps infantry, Air Force Para jumpers, and everything else that was previously open only to men. There will be no barriers at all in their way.” Have you ever read or watched the training Navy Seals must go through? It is unbelievably rigorous even for men and not what God intended for women.

Even before this new law, casualties for women in the military as of October 2015 include more than 1,000 wounded in action and at least 161 deaths. God did not create women to engage in battle, but to be the loving nurturers in our society. It sounds great to the liberal mind, but it is opposite to God’s Word!

1 Peter 3:8 says: “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them (your wives) according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” Fenton’s translation calls it: “assigning honour to their FEMININE NATURE, as to a weaker vessel.”

God calls wives “the weaker vessel.” That’s why He wants husbands to honor and protect them. The word honor means “value, esteem of the highest degree, dignity, preciousness.” Women were always honored in society. In a state of emergency men saved the women and children first. It would be difficult for a soldier to stop in the middle of battle to save a fellow female soldier (which should be am man’s instinct). And how can a female soldier forget protecting herself to save a fellow male soldier? One retired army major states: "If you look at the population demographics, most women—and you're talking thousands—cannot properly carry a 230-pound soldier with rucksack and combat vest on, off the battle field to save his life."

Men are now ignorant of how to honor women because of the brainwashing of feminism which negates the beauty of their femininity. They don’t know how to treat them “according to knowledge.” When they no longer see women as a prized possession to be protected and cared for, they do not know how to function correctly as men.

What about women who become officers and order other men what to do? This is also opposite to God’s plan for femininity. We don’t come into our marriage to order our husbands around. I’m ashamed to say that I have tried to do this, but it doesn’t work. Men hate it and run from it. It is not feminine. And although we think we may be helping our husbands, we actually destroy their masculinity and manhood.

The man who is tougher to face the knocks of the world looks for a woman who is soft in nature, warm in heart, and loving and accepting of him as a man. A real man doesn’t want to be like a woman and a real woman should not want to be like a man.

Why have we become a society that are victims to liberalism and a false agenda? Our strength is our femininity, not embracing the man’s role.

Blessings from NANCY CAMPBELL
www.aboverubies.org

PRAYER:

“Dearest Father, thank you so much for your divine plan which is perfect. All your ways are perfect. Help me to embrace who You created me to be and to walk in the glory of femininity. This is how I bring glory to You because You created me for this purpose. Amen.”

AFFIRMATION:

My womanly strength is in my femininity, embracing the fulness of my femaleness.

FURTHER LINKS:
To read more about femininity, go to:
http://bit.ly/QuintessentiallyFeminine
http://tinyurl.com/FullFemale
http://tinyurl.com/MotherhoodProtectYourWomb

MY HUSBAND’S HELPER

Part 5 (The Strengths I Bring to my Marriage and Family)

“The tongue of the wise commends knowledge,
    but the mouths of fools pour out folly. ”
(Proverbs 15:2).

Are you your husband’s helper?

6. STRONG TO SUBMIT

It’s Beautiful

Isn’t amazing how many modern wives do not like this word? And yet it is a biblical word. A beautiful word.

1 Peter 3:15 (BECK) states: “This is how long ago the holy women who trusted in God used to make themselves beautiful: they submitted to their husbands, like Sarah who obeyed Abraham and call him lord.”

The New Century Version says: “In this same way the holy women who lived long ago and followed God, made themselves beautiful, yielding to their own husbands.”

This is how the women in those days adorned themselves. They submitted to and reverenced their husbands. A little different to today’s wives.

Under the Blessing

We should check out what this word means, shouldn’t we? The Greek word is hupotasso.
Hupo means “under” and tasso means “to arrange in an orderly manner, to assign to a certain position.”

God intends the wife to come under her husband’s covering. She comes under his headship to be protected by him, provided for by him, and to be led by him. Why do we resist this beautiful plan of God? Usually because of independence, rebellion, or wanting our own way. It never works for our blessing, our husband’s blessing, or the blessing of our children.

I love reading other Scriptures where the word hupo is used, e.g.

When Jesus looked out of Jerusalem, he cried: “How often would I have gathered thy children together, even as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, and ye would not” (Matthew 23:37). Isn’t a beautiful thing to be protected under our husbands? And yet there is always a resistance to God’s way. The flesh wars against the spirit. Even the people of Jerusalem didn’t want God’s protection. They wanted their own way.

Jesus talked about the little mustard seed that grows up to be a big tree “so that the fowls of the air may lodge under the shadow of it” (Mark 4:32). Another picture of protection.

1 Corinthians 10:1, 2 tells us how God protected the Israelites in the wilderness “under the cloud.” God gave them a cloud by the day to protect them from the heat and a cloud (a pillar of fire) by night to keep them warm. Another revelation of being under the blessing of God.

It’s not always easy to submit. We must give up our own way and say No to the flesh. That’s why we must be strong. It’s three-year-old behavior to demand our own way. It takes maturity to submit.

7. STRONG TO SATISFY

The very first thing God reveals about marriage is that we will be “one flesh.” Genesis 2:24 says: “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” It is impossible for the man to be “one flesh” without his wife. Therefore, this is the most important way we “help” our husbands. Our bodies were designed for this oneness. It is an essential part of our marriage or we don’t have a marriage!

Sometimes we must remind ourselves of 1 Corinthians 7:3-5: “The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife. Do not deprive each other of sexual relations.”

Proverbs 5:19 gives a further description of the wife’s role: “Let her (his wife) be as the loving hind and pleasant roe: let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.” The CEB translates: “Let her breasts intoxicate you all the time; always be drunk on her love.”

God gives the wife to the husband for this purpose (and many others too). We are a divine helper to our husbands in so many ways. We must take notice of a few important points in this Scripture.

a) Satisfy. We are to satisfy the God-given needs of our husbands. The word for “let her breasts satisfy thee” is ravah and means “to slake the thirst, make drunk, satiate.” Got the message?
b) At all times. Do you notice that our breasts are to satiate always? “At all times” doesn’t mean sometimes. “At all times” means at times when we may not feel like it.
c) Ravish. We do not give grudgingly to our husbands, but think how we can ravish them. The word “ravish” is interesting. The Hebrew is shagah and means “to go astray, to err.” However, in the context of marriage, it does not mean to err in sin, but to err in loving. Other translations say the husband is to be “enraptured,” “captivated,” exhilarated,” “be drunk,” and “transported with delight” with his wife’s love. This is how we are to minister to our husbands. Don’t settle for the boring, but willingly enrapture your husband.
d) Always. Once again, the Bible emphasizes the word “always.” Not sometimes, when we feel like it, or when we have the urge, but ALWAYS ready. Not only to be ready, but to initiate.

What does “always” mean? The word is tamiyd and means “continually, constant, regular, perpetual.” This same word is used of the “continual” burnt offerings. It is translated “daily,” speaking of the daily sacrifices which happened every morning and every evening. It’s the same word that says: “So shall I keep thy law continually” (Psalm 119:44). It’s the same word in Psalm 34:1: “His praise shall continually be in my mouth.” Now, I am not saying you can always keep up with the daily, but at least you get the message that it is to be regular.

The wonderful thing is that as you seek to minister to your husband as his divine helper, to satisfy and satiate his needs, you will be satiated too. And remember one other thing. The devil hates every beautiful gift from God. Therefore, he hates the intimacy of marriage and seeks to pervert it or stop us from enjoying it. Don’t let the devil have his way. Let God have His way.

Blessings from Nancy Campbell
www.aboverubies.org

PRAYER:

Dear Father, I thank you so much for your beautiful plan for our marriage. I thank you for making me a special and suitable helper for my husband. He cannot do without me. Help me to be all that You want me to be to him. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”

AFFIRMATION:

As I lay down my life, I find life.
As I satisfy my husband, I am satisfied.
As I yield to him, I am filled with joy and peace.

MY HUSBAND’S HELPER

Part 4 (The Strengths I Bring to my Marriage and Family)

“The tongue of the wise useth knowledge aright: but the mouth of fools poureth out foolishness”
(Proverbs 15:2).

Today we continue Point 4 about how God has given women a gift with words.

4. STRONG TO SPEAK continued.

A Soft Answer

God’s Word is so wonderful. It teaches us exactly how to operate the tongue. In times of turmoil or argument Proverbs 15:1 tells us: “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.” Soft, tender, and gentle words have far more power than loud, angry words. In all situations, Shakespeare’s words are a good testimony of a woman: “Her voice was ever soft, gentle, and low, an excellent thing in woman.”

Don’t Nag

We each know that nagging destroys a marriage relationship. The big thing is NOT TO NAG! Once again, the Bible reminds us:

Proverbs 21:9 (HCSB): “Better to live on the corner of a roof than to share a house with a nagging wife.” Repeated in Proverbs 25:24.

Proverbs 21:19: “It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.”

Proverbs 27:15 (HCSB): “An endless dripping on a rainy day and a nagging wife are alike.”

Don’t Open Your Mouth

However, although we love to talk, there are times when we should not open our mouths at all. When you feel mad and only have negative words to spout off to your husband (or children), keep your mouth shut. You’ll regret the words you speak.

What did Jesus do when he was threatened, ridiculed, and reviled? He didn’t say one word (Isaiah 53:7; Matthew 26:62, 63; 27:12-14; Mark 4:61; 15:5; John 1'9:9; and 1 Peter 2:23)! To be a true helpmeet to our husbands, we must learn when to speak and when not to speak. We must train our mouth to submit to our will.

Speak for Righteousness

However, we have not been given a voice to hide in seclusion. We come into our marriage and family to be a voice for all that is holy, righteous, good, and lovely. We abhor evil and cleave to the good (Romans 12:9). We hate every evil way (Psalm 119:101). Therefore, we speak out against evil. We will not tolerate that which God hates. Rather than tolerate evil, we tremble at God’s Word. Therefore, we do not keep our mouths quiet when we must speak for righteousness (Proverbs 31:8, 9; Isaiah 58:1; and Ephesians 5:11). We fear God rather than the praises of people.

5. STRONG IN COMPANIONSHIP

Your husband needs your friendship. You were created to be his companion and he chose you to be his best friend. Titus 2:4 commands the older women to teach the young women how to love their husbands. The Greek word is philandros meaning “to be friendly and affectionate.” It’s not enough to know that you love your husband. He doesn’t know what you think. You must show it to him. Cultivate being a cuddly, kissy, and physically-touching wife.

Take every opportunity to show him physical affection. Write notes to him in the most surprising places. Think of creative ways to remind him of your love. It’s so easy to forget about this during your daily grind and the overwhelmingness of life. That’s why I’m reminding you. We need fresh reminders every day. Caress him when he comes near you. Hold his hand when driving in the car. What else are you going to do?

This is how you be a helper to your husband. It does wonders for him.

Blessings from Nancy Campbell
www.aboverubies.org

PRAYER:

“Dear Father, please help me to be a true helper to my husband. Show me how to love him more freely and affectionately each day. Help me to make his life complete, for this is your will for me. Amen.”

AFFIRMATION:

I am thinking of new ways to show affection to my husband each day.