LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell

EPISODE 358: LOSING A HUSBAND

Robyn, also a New Zealander, but now living in Texas, shares today. Beginning in a de facto relationship, coming to Christ, getting married, and serving God together, she then tells the story of losing her husband of 40 years and how God brought her through.

Announcer: Welcome to the podcast, Life to The Full, with Nancy Campbell, founder and publisher of Above Rubies.

Nancy Campbell: Hello, ladies again! And yippee! You’ve got another New Zealander talking to you today. This time it is Robyn Coughlin. At one time, she was Robyn Edmonds. She’s going to tell you her story.

Well, Robyn, it’s such a joy to have you here. What a great time we’ve all had, enjoying one another, and talking about the old days, the good old days. Actually, they were the good old days. Wow! We’d love to have some of those good old days again, wouldn’t we? They were also part of our glorious church life where the Holy Spirit was moving back in those days. Robyn, just start off! Let’s start off from the beginning.

Robyn: Kia Ora, which is our hello from New Zealand. I met up with you in 1978.

Nancy: Wow!

Robyn: I know and that is quite scary because you see how long ago that is. We were so young, but we got saved in the Christian Center. That was amazing and baptized. Then I started to go to Sue Kuru’s Ladies’ Bible study and your Wednesday night meetings. My husband, Lee and me.

It was amazing, because I’d been brought up with a mother who came from Exclusive Brethren Church and father not a Christian. Lee grew up with a single mother whose father died when he was seven and then an abusive stepfather. We didn’t know what it was.

I remember when I was pregnant with our Kelly, our first. God spoke to Lee. Lee was beside himself because he said, “I don’t know how to be a father! I don’t know. I’ve never had a father. I don’t know how to be a father.” And God said it was OK, that he had His hand on it, and He would be a father to Lee, and Lee would be a father.

It was really amazing, because that was when we came into Christian fellowship, and all we’d meet were these strong fathers in our church where men of God are. We so needed to have men in the church. It’s blessing to have women, but to have men in the church too. We were really blessed to be under some really great men. That’s how we learned to be parents. That’s how we learned what a family looked like even. That was our beginning.

From there we moved up to Taranaki and New Plymouth. We would minister. We were very involved with the AOG Church and the Elim Church. We loved it there. But with all that, we really didn’t get it together. We met at 16 yrs old. It was my 17^th birthday, and Lee was 16 years old. We were babies having babies, really.

Nancy: Now, today, you have 19 grandchildren and three great-grandchildren, so far!

Robyn: Absolutely. The blessings of my heart. Beautiful children. My oldest granddaughter is 27. She’s married with two children. My youngest is one. His mom is pregnant, and due in April.

So, we moved to New Plymouth. We loved God. We did love God, and we ministered for God, but we didn’t always click. Marriages are fluid, it goes, but I knew that we could do better. I was really praying to God one day. Someone had given me a message by Larry Lee. I don’t know much about him, but he used to preach on the Lord’s prayer.

I listened to his video, and I couldn’t tell you a thing he said about the Lord’s prayer, but he made one comment. He said, “I’ve been married for 10 years, and it was the best thing that has happened.” I thought, “Well, I’ve been married for 10 years by then and it was sometimes hell.”

I thought, “Lord, I’m not doing this right.” I’d had you as an example. I thought, and I looked at my measure and I’ve written in the book I’m writing, and that I’m about to publish on marriage. I put in there about Nancy Campbell, and you had given us a measure stick to what it looked like to be a wife.

I’d done that. Run a bath when he came home. Made sure I did all the things you taught us. Made sure there were potatoes on the element boiling so he’d come home to the smell of food. He was a Maori and Maori people love food. I’d do these little things. Lee’s mother would say, “You’re making a rod for your back!” But I loved serving my husband and my children. But I thought, “There is something that isn’t quite right.” I went on search about what it was to have a kingdom marriage. That’s what my book is on.

From there, I put these things into practice. We became pastors and assistant pastors in 1990. We took over church in 1994 in Taumarunui and then we planted a church in New Plymouth. Even though I put these things in process. I realized that it was nothing to do with Lee. It all came back to what I was as a wife.

Proverbs 31 is my favorite chapter in the Bible. I could see that she made her husband look good. He would sit in the gates. That was always my whole desire, to make my husband look good. I became a manager of a social service. Even then, I thought, “If I make my social workers look good, I look good! If my husband looks good, I look good!” It was always my mission to make sure that he looked good, and that he had everything he needed, that he was blessed that I served him.

It became my heart’s desire. Lee would say, “What would you like for Christmas,” or “What would you like . . . ?” To be honest, my whole desire was always to be the best wife I could be. If you know God said, “What would you like to pray for?” “I want to be the best wife.” “What would you like, Robyn?” “I want to be the best wife.” It’s always been my heart’s desire, always, to be the best wife.

We had some beautiful years together. It was a terrible time in 2010. That’s another story. We moved to Auckland. In 2014, Lee had a heart attack on Kelly’s birthday. He was in hospital. He had six new arteries put in.

In March of 2014, he had a massive stroke, which left him in a wheelchair. It was a terrible time. Eight months in hospital having rehab. We were in Auckland at that time. He was in the Middlemore Hospital. They wanted to take him to the Auckland hospital because after a stroke, your brain can swell. We were there for four days.

They wanted to take us back to Middlemore Hospital. But he just had gone downhill. I got very annoyed with the hospitals. They said, “The ambulance is here.” I said, “Look, there’s something wrong. I’m not letting him go anywhere until a doctor comes.” They were fighting me on it. But in the end, I was very stern. I can be very stern.

I said, “We’re not leaving here until a doctor comes.” Praise God, I praise God, because his brain had swollen. If we’d got to Middlemore, he would have died. They took him into surgery, removed his skull bone. He was eight months without a skull bone. Then he went to rehab.

Then he came home, still with no skull bone. My brother died and I was at the funeral. They rang to say, “Bring him in.” They were going to put the skull bone back in. I had to go home. When they put it in, they screwed his skull bone in, and a screw came loose from his head.

I’d get up in the morning and I’d go to work. By the time I got home at lunchtime to make sure he was OK, his head had sort of crumbled in, if you like. It’s hard to say. For six months I took him to hospital. I went to the doctors. They would tell me it was normal. It’s gravity. But what was happening at nighttime to put him to bed, to lay him down! The pain was so bad we both cried.

Nancy: Oooh.

Robyn: They got him a bit of movement back in his arm, so I rang and asked for physiotherapy to come back. They said he’d never walk again. We’d already proved that wrong. I’d help him move his leg and by Christmas, with help, he was sort of able to walk a little bit. He was in a wheelchair. She came. I was at work. My daughter was home. We had moved in to be with them.

She walked in the door, and she said, “Oh my gosh, what’s happened to his head?” Because it was all caved in. Rebekah explained I’d been trying to get help, and she said, “Well, I’m not prepared to do anything.” She had a neurologist doctor, and she went back to talk to him, and I got a phone call at work. “Bring him in straightaway.” I took him straight to hospital. I was really annoyed because we had to fight to get him into a ward.

Nancy: Oh, my goodness!

Robyn: We didn’t see anybody. They came at three o’clock and took him. I didn’t know they were doing an MRI on him. He was a big man, so it was quite stressful for him. Brought him back.

They came in at five o’clock, and said we could go home! I said, “I’m not going anywhere until I see a doctor! What’s going on?” They came in to say that the screw had come out and that they had to make a plastic skull for him. We would have to come back in two weeks. They’d put staples in his head when they put the skull back on. I said, “Please don’t put them back in his head!” Because they just pulled them out. It was such a traumatic time.

Two weeks later, we had not heard from the hospital. So I rang, and she said, “Well, I ordered the skull from Australia, and I’ve got nothing for him.” Oh, my goodness me! I’m very stern at times. She said, “I’m onto it.” Another two weeks later, we got a phone call. Had to take him back in. Came back out with a new skull. The staples in his head again. I was so angry. So angry.

But he came out of it crying. The nurse said to him, “Are you in pain?” I said, “No, he’s not in pain. He’s relieved.” She said, “I’m asking him. Are you in pain?” He pointed to me, and I said, “I told you what’s wrong with him.”

Why don’t they listen? There are so many things in the hospital that were so wrong. They told me I wasn’t able to visit him in the morning because the visiting hours are at two o’clock. And I said “Well, that’s lovely. I think it’s a very good thing that the visiting hours are as of two o’clock but I’m not a visitor. I’m his wife and I’ll be here first thing in the morning!”

I slept there to start with and then they told me I couldn’t do that. I slept there on the floor, and I wasn’t allowed to do that. I wasn’t allowed to sleep in a chair. So then, they gave me a room with a little bed underneath the window and I’d sleep on there. That was to start with.

But the second time he went back, I’d go up in the morning after work and stay and put him to bed and go home. That was our life. Then he came home with his nice new skull bone. And he was really good. He was walking a little bit. I advertised in the church for someone who could take him out one day a week.

I was told I should put him into respite, so I said to him once, “Do you think you need to go to respite?” He said, “Well, if you need a break.” I said, “When you took all your boys on your motorbike down to the South Island for a ride, it wasn’t because I needed a break.” He wanted to go. “But if you want to go to respite, I’ll do that. But if not, I’m not getting respite.” And he didn’t want to go. I said, “Well, you're not having to go.”

One dear man, Jeff, would take him out once a week. It was what he needed. It was fantastic. He knew something was happening. Lee made me promise not to resuscitate him. We’d talk about all these things. If I’m really honest, things were really hard. I had to get him into bed at night, get him into the car.

I had to learn how to use a wheelchair. Wheelchairs have no toilets when you go to movies, they have disabled toilets but are either in the men’s room or the women’s room. I had to push him into the women’s room, and quickly help him, and wait till everyone went out then push him out again. No one thinks about wheelchairs, but I must admit I hadn’t before either until having my husband in one for two and a half years. I have now my husband was in a wheelchair. Now if I see anyone in a wheelchair, my heart goes out to them. People at times helped me, but I want to say, it was a lot easier just to do it myself.

We bought a van and an electric wheelchair. In New Zealand, if you have an accident, they’ll pay for everything. But if you’ve got medical, and no insurance, you pay for everything. We went from two wages to one wage. God was good, but I have to admit, one part we thought we would end it all. He couldn’t cope with it all and I said, “Well if you’re going, I’m going!”

“But we can’t do this to our grandchildren,” I said. About a week later, he said, “Should we end it?” I said, “Too late, we’re living!” It was hard.

But it was hard. It was hard. You don’t want to live in pity, so you go to church with a smile. I used to lose him. He’d be in there with his wheelchair. The lights would go out and I’d be running around the church trying to find him, because he would have gone off to talk to men in his wheelchair.

But then he had the last massive stroke. It was about two weeks before he’d wake me up and say he wanted to run away. He’d had enough. So, we talked about our life for hours. He said, “You’d better go to sleep.” He touched my hand and said, “It’s OK. Summer’s coming.”

Nancy: Summer’s coming.

Robyn: Summer’s coming. I thought he was going to be healed. We’re going to get back into the ministry. It’s going to be OK. And he died two weeks later. I thought, “Well, maybe he was telling me he was dying.”

For two-and-a-half years. When he had a massive stroke. We took him to the hospital, and they said the first stroke had had taken the right side of his brain. That’s why he was paralyzed on his left side. It was completely mushed. But the second stroke he had took the left side of his brain, so his whole brain was mushed. They said if he came out of it, he would never be able to communicate. We couldn’t communicate with him.

What should I do? Well, you know, when you're asked what do you do? “God, what do I do?” You feel like you're playing God. What do I do? Basically, do I let him die? Well, I wanted to take him home, vegetable or no vegetable What do you do?  

Praise God, his brother, who was a pastor Mahau, he came. I talked to him. I said, “What do I do?” He said he knew we’d have this death talk. He said, “What does he want?” I said, “Well, he made me promise never to resuscitate. He said, “Oh. So basically, you've got to choose what you want versus what he wants.” I thought, “It’s a big decision to make.” So, I prayed God. I don’t know what to do.

We had this dear friend come up. They had been friends with us for many years. Unknown to me Lee had had a word for him Sunday in church, which was spot on, just a few weeks before that. He said to me, he’d been praying that morning, and God had told him to come and tell me to let him go. And he said he was scared to tell me, because he said, “You're such people of faith.” He thought I would chastise him and say, “Don’t say that to me!” But I said, “No, I’ve been praying, “God, what do I do?”

With that, my dear, dear friends from New Plymouth, Martin and Debbie came in, I was telling him, “What do I think?” Debbie said, “Martin, did you tell her?” He said, “Not yet.” He’d been praying for Lee that morning before he came, and God said, “He’s already with me. He’s already gone.” That was what I knew. I said, “God, I release him to You.” Ten days later, he passed away. We had been together 40 years on October 30^th, and he died on the fourth of November.

Nancy: Oh, wow.

Robyn: I’m over it but I miss him. But the story is not finished yet.

Nancy: God’s story is never finished.

Robyn: When he died, a lady came up here and said to me, because I was pretty mad. “God, he’s only 57. We were getting old together. We were going to get old motorbikes, Harley Davidsons. Those ones that you go round. We had planned to be 80.” She said to me, “Well, that was God’s purpose for Lee.” And I don’t know where it came from, but I said, “No, that was God’s purpose for me.”

I thought, “Oh, I can’t say that!” But anyway, I thought, “Lord, I just trust You.” I couldn’t rid of him saying, “Summer’s coming.” I thought, “Oh, no. He knew he was dying. Let it go. Let it go.” But anyway, I went down to my brother, and he pastors a church in Masterson, Solway Park, a great church in Masterson.

I went down there. They had someone speaking. They had a friend called Cornelius Perez whose wife died two months after Lee. We’d talked together as widows who had both been married for years. I said, “I’ll come down and see Cornelius.” He said, “Well, there’s a pastor with him called Mark.” I have to admit, he did send me a photo of him.

Nancy: But wait on. Before you get to this, you were telling me about what happened at the unveiling of your husband. Tell them about the Maori culture, and what happens there, because your husband was a Maori.

Robyn: He was Maori. When you're Maori . . . oh, it was beautiful, actually. It really was beautiful. We took him to Destiny Church, and we had a night at the church. Apostle Tamaki had him on the stage. On Sunday we had a funeral service, and it was beautiful. We had some Harley Davidsons on the stage because he was a real Harley rider.

We took him down to the Marae on Monday, which is where Maori . . . He is from a little place called Halcombe. Out the back, there’s a Marae called Tokorangi. That’s where his family were. He had always said, “I just want to go home.” That was home to him. For two reasons that was home to him.

But secondly, for Maori, Home is like a big, how do you explain it? Just a little village but it’s like one big house. You go to stay, you put the mattresses out on the floor. It’s family.

Nancy: I can remember going to a Maori marae. Here you are. It’s so amazing. All the mattresses are on the floor and it’s a day conference. You listen to a speaker but if you get tired, you just go to sleep on the mattress. You wake up again and there’s another speaker started. This is the Maori way. And then you’ll have a “Maori hangi,” which is cooking the food down in the ground. Then we’ll all have that together.

Robyn: He also wanted to go home, because it would mean his children would come home. It’s very important to have that. They knew who they were. So, we did. We took him down there. What happened is we have three days and it’s a very tiring thing. People come from over.

We had so many people come to see him. They come before the actual funeral, then the “tangi” (meaning “to weep”) the funeral that day. They come to give their love, and their wishes. So, what happens is they come on, they get called on, which is “karanga” (exchanging greetings, paying tribute to the dead). A beautiful woman cries out “Welcome.” And the people of the land from there would sit up and say who they are. Then you sing. They sing. Then the next people speak who had come to visit and they say who they are. Then they sing. When you’ve got lots of people it can take a while! We were there for three days.

Nancy: This is the funeral.

Robyn: This is the funeral. We had an open casket. It was so beautiful. They closed the coffin in the morning before sunrise. That’s the way they do it. I heard some lady saying it was the most peaceful covering a body they had. It was beautiful and we worshipped all night with him there.

He’d always loved Mrs. Green, who is Sue and Rebecca’s mum. We’d gone to her funeral. We worshipped around the grave afterwards. He always said . . . we were only in our 20’s, I think then. He used to always say, “When I die, I want a funeral like Mrs. Green’s.” So, we worshipped like Mrs. Green’s all night. It was just beautiful. That’s what they do for the funeral. Then we go over and we bury him and that was beautiful.

A year later, we come back and have what’s called an unveiling. I got this beautiful big headstone, and it’s a big Harley Davidson headstone. He had his favorite verse on the back, because he always wanted everybody to know who his family was. On the back, “Choose you this day whom you will serve. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

He wanted his children to always remember whose he was and who they are. That’s on his grave. But what we do is uncover the gravestone. It was covered over so we uncovered it, and we read what’s on it.

Nancy: This is Maori culture.

Robyn: This is Maori culture. It’s beautiful. It’s a time for that whole year to grieve. When you uncover that it’s a new day. So, on that night, we had all stayed at in Marae that night. We all spoke. I got up and said, “If you’ve ever read a really good book, and you’re on the last page and you don’t want to finish the book, because it’s been such a beautiful book, but you have to close it, because you have a new book . . .” I said to them, “Tomorrow, after the unveiling, I’m starting a new book.”

A lot of them had been in our church, and they called me Pastor Robyn. I said, “First, please don’t call me Pastor Robyn anymore.” Some of them were, “What are we going to call you?” I said “Well, not just late for lunch. But don’t call me ‘Pastor.’ My name is Robyn, or Nana Robyn, or whatever you want to call me.” And my granddaughter was four years old.

She said, “Mum! Nana’s having a new name! Can I have a new name?” She said, “Yes! What would you like to be called?” And she said, “Hulk Smash. So, she’s been Hulk Smash ever since. She’s 12 now. It’s just a family joke she’s picked up from there when she was four years old. Amazing.

We did that. I started my new book. I started my new chapter, never realizing what would be involved with my new chapter, but I knew I wasn’t finished from God.

Nancy: Just before you go on, tell me how this affected your children.

Robyn: Oh, he was such a huge part of our lives. He was a huge part of our grandchildren’s lives. We had a lot of grandchildren living with us. We have always been, in fact, the first church we built was on the backs of our children. The second church we built was with our children. They were very much a part, and it devastated them.

In fact, we knew he was dying. He had ten grandchildren. I brought them in and set them down and told them that Granddad was going to be with Jesus, and that they needed to say good-bye. We set them down and it was really hard. They all said they had spent time with him and said goodbye. It was a really beautiful time.

But my oldest granddaughter, she never actually grieved. She had a miscarriage after her daughter. She just bawled and realized that she was also grieving. We saw now, this is a whole new thing, and I don’t want to offend anybody at all, because we’ve all taught our children about familiar spirits, people going to do Ouija boards and mediums. It’s demonic. It’s wrong.

But I believe after this experience, we haven’t talked about me talking about this. We had so many strange things happen after he had died that I could write a book. The first one was my granddaughter Olivia had prayed for his sister, and had really broken something off her.

She dreamt that night that we were at our church in New Plymouth. Lee came, and she said, “Koro.” They called him Koro (usually a term to address an older man). “What was that demon that came off Renae? I prayed for her.” He never said a word but on a piece of paper he wrote, “Garth is a spirit.” The next morning she rings me and says, “Nan, what’s a ‘Garth-spirit?’” I said, “What?” And she explained her dream to me. I just got cold.

Honestly, I didn’t know what to say. I rang back and I said, “Did he write ‘Garth is a spirit,’ or ‘Garth is a demon?’” She said, “He wrote ‘Garth is a spirit.’” They rang me back and I said, “Garth is your mother’s brother. Before we had Kelly, I had a miscarriage, and we called him Garth.” We had never spoken to anyone about him. It was just between the two of us, even the name. So, I said, “He is a spirit.”

Nancy: He’s alive in eternity.

Robyn: Yes, But I could go on and on. That’s a whole new subject. I could go on, because that’s not the only thing that happened. When I see people now, I say, “So, what strange things happened after your loved ones died?” And they look at me, with this “Hmmm!”  to talk about that, because Christians don’t.

But I tell you, there is stuff about death we don’t know. Honestly, I’ve had such amazing experiences. I could write a book alone on what’s happened with our family since he was dead.

Nancy: But what a beautiful confirmation that this little one, “Garth is with the Lord, in eternity, waiting for you.”

Robyn: My granddaughter had her miscarriage because she knew instantly that child was her koro. That was beautiful. There was such healing. God never wastes anything. God uses everything. Absolutely everything. Every tear, everything. It’s beautiful.

Nancy: Yes.

Robyn: So, now I’m in America. Now I’m Mrs. Coughlin.

Nancy: Yes!

Robyn: They’ll have to tell that story.

Nancy: Well, maybe we could do it in the next podcast.

Robyn: Well, I could do it very quickly. Basically, he said, “Summer’s coming.” I met Mark. He asked me to come to Texas. We got on so well. We kept in touch and a month later I came to Texas. I had a terrible time getting here. Missed a flight, delayed a flight, lost all my bags. I came from the middle of winter to the middle of summer. And Texas summers are out of this world.

Nancy: Everyone won’t understand that if they don’t know New Zealand, because New Zealand has such a very temperate climate. When we left the shores of New Zealand, the first time we left the shores of New Zealand, we went to the Philippine Islands. We were going as missionaries there. I will never forget the first night I was in Manila. I truly didn’t know whether I’d get through the night. I didn’t think I could breathe, it was so hot!

Robyn: I’m not used to that, but I walked into his house. I opened the door, and I was beside myself, because here I was. I didn’t really know him that well. And he said to me, “Oh, it’s OK. Summer’s here.” The last words of my husband, “Summer’s coming.” The first words from Mark when I arrived here to spy out the land, “Summer’s here.” And I knew that God had a plan for me in America.

Nancy: Yes. How many years had you been on your own?

Robyn: I’d been on my own for two-and-a-half years after Lee died. I’ve been married to Mark; it will be six years in September. God is faithful.

Nancy: Wow! That’s so beautiful. Over all these things, the Lord has taught you many things about marriage, especially during the years with Mark. I think it would be good if we could do another podcast. Would you like share some of the things that God has shown you?

Robyn: Absolutely. Because one thing I was thinking, “Oh, my gosh! I’ve written a workbook.” I’ve done it with our churches and our leaders had to do it. The marriage course is being taught in America and New Zealand, both.

Then I’m married to another man! I’m thinking, how’s this going to work? This workshop was mainly based on Lee. Do you know what? The principles work. Mark had been married before. I was a widow. We’re older in life and you can get set in your ways when you're older.

Nancy: There are more challenges!

Robyn: There are. But you know what? The principles that God gave me for my kingdom marriage work with Mark as they did with Lee. It’s not about the man. It’s about what God has done for us as women and the power that you have as woman. Amen. Hallelujah!

Nancy: Well, would you like to pray?

Robyn: “Oh, Father, Lord, I thank You. I want to thank You Nancy. Father, I thank You for the wisdom that You poured into us, that, Father, here I am. Not quite the next generation, but Father, it’s so alive in me that I want to pour it into the next generation. And Lord, You said older women teach the younger. The sad thing is a lot of older women don’t know the very precious gems that we were given.

“Father, I thank You to be reconnect with Nancy. Father, we thank You that You’re there for us. I thank You, Lord, that this podcast, and I pray that every woman, Father, that is listening to this podcast, that Father, You would pour into her life the gems that You have for her as a woman. Lord, we are in a day where the world that is trying pull down and destroy womanhood. Father, we lift it up high, because Father, it is Your design. We thank You, and we praise Your mighty Name. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

Nancy: Amen.

Blessings from Nancy Campbell

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www.aboverubies.org

Transcribed by Darlene Norris

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DON’T FORGET TO TELL OTHERS ABOUT THIS PODCAST, “LIFE TO THE FULL” WITH NANCY CAMPBELL.” DON’T KEEP THE BLESSINGS TO YOURSELF. IT IS ENCOURAGEMENT FOR ALL WIVES AND MOTHERS.

 

LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell

EPISODE 357: A LIFE POURED OUT

I want you to meet another New Zealander today. More New Zealand accent! Sue Kuru was my neighbor when we lived in Palmerston North, New Zealand. It is my first time meeting Sue again after about 45 years!

Along with Val Stares who is now the director of Above Rubies in Australia, Sue was the first person to hear about the vision of Above Rubies. We share about the amazing things that were happening in those days as Above Rubies began, and in our church life.

Announcer: Welcome to the podcast, Life to The Full, with Nancy Campbell, founder and publisher of Above Rubies.

Nancy Campbell: Hello, ladies! Well, we’re continuing today to hear from some of my wonderful friends from New Zealand, back in the early days, when I started Above Rubies, and when we were raising our young children in New Zealand.

Last week you heard the wonderful testimony from Rebecca Southey. Now Rebecca and Sue, who I’ve got with me now, are sisters. Although Rebecca was adopted into their family, of course, they grew up as sisters, and are sisters today, so close together.

Today I have with me Sue Kuru. Sue is very special because Sue was my neighbor when we lived in New Zealand. Sue was part of everything that was happening. My weekly ladies’ Bible study when we all got together as mothers and all these children. Always more children than mothers! They were such wonderful times. She was part of our house group during the week, part of our church, and all that was happening.

Oh, mighty, mighty things were happening in those days. We thought it was normal, although we don’t actually see these things so much today. Every single Sunday, people would come to know the Lord and be baptized. The baptismal pool was always open, because every Sunday night, people were being baptized.

Ladies were coming to know the Lord at our ladies’ meetings which we were having all over the city. People were coming to know the Lord in our house groups which were all over the city. It was just the most amazing time.

And it was in the midst of this time that I got the vision for Above Rubies. It didn’t happen all out of nowhere. It actually happened through the vision of another woman. I do believe this   that when you get a vision from God, it will always be ongoing, and it will branch off into greater visions.

What happened at that time was the inroads of feminism were beginning to infiltrate even our little country way down in the bottom of the world, New Zealand. These feminists were arranging a national conference and bringing the women of New Zealand together. It was under the normal women’s convention thing, but now it was being taken over by the feminists, and they were having seminars on abortion, and a female god, and all these different things that they were trying to bring in.

But there was a woman, a pastor’s wife, in Christchurch, Anne Morrow, who got the vision to put on a convention to eclipse this feminist one. God put this strongly on her heart, to have this convention, where we would have seminars on the biblical values for families. She asked me at that convention to speak on Motherhood. Well, this was the very first time I’d ever actually spoken about motherhood.

So, I prepared for that seminar and there were loads of other wonderful seminars. Anne said to me, “Nancy, get as many women as you can get.” I lived up in the North Island. She was down in the south. I ended up filling a Friendship plane, and just about filling a Boeing plane. You came too, Sue, didn’t you?

Sue: I did.

Nancy: Yes, we all went down to Christchurch, and we eclipsed that feminist convention!

Sue: We did.

Nancy: It was amazing!

Sue: Amazing.

Nancy: Oh, yes! And here we are talking. I haven’t even introduced you to them yet. This is Sue. Say “hi”!

Sue: Hi from New Zealand!

Nancy: Yes, and you're going to hear more from Sue in just a moment. Anyway, that wasn’t the end, because I came home from that convention and God put it upon my heart to start a magazine, something that would keep coming to the home, and keep coming to the mothers and the families to encourage them in their high calling. Yes, this convention was amazing but there needed to be something ongoing.

This burden was so strong upon me, the strongest burden I’ve ever had upon my life! In my whole life! And the amazing thing is, I can’t even imagine why God chose me, because I didn’t know what I was going to do or how I was going to do it.

But I had this vision, and the very first person, well, there were two people who first heard about it. Sue and my friend, Val. Sue was in the hospital with her little daughter, Hine. I went up to see her, and my friend Val also arrived to see her. What happened there, Sue?

Sue: Well, the exciting time we had there at the time.

Nancy: We were at the hospital, remember? I prayed for Hine, didn’t I?

Sue: We were at the hospital. Nancy brought some oil, and we wanted to anoint Hine and pray for her. We were on a mission for the healing of my daughter to be set free of this condition that she had. She was going in for a big operation and we were praying for that. We had big results. It was a miracle how it all happened. My daughter had three kidneys and was healed after the operation.

Nancy: Yes, praise the Lord. Well, anyway, it was there when we were visiting together. Then I said to Sue, and to Val, “Hey! I’ve got this vision from the Lord! We’re going to get out” (notice I said “we.” I didn’t say “I.”) I said, “We’re going to get out this magazine to the women of the nation to encourage them in their high calling of motherhood!”

Well, I remember Val looking at me with this blank stare. Interestingly, her name was Val Stares! I didn’t know that that very morning Val had said to the Lord, “If Nancy Campbell comes up with anymore of her great ideas, I’m not getting involved!” Well, she got involved. Val is still involved today, 47 plus years later since we started Above Rubies. She’s now the director of Above Rubies in Australia, carrying on. But that was the very beginning.

So, Sue, who is sitting here with me today, was, along with Val, the very first to hear the vision. Oh, it’s so wonderful having Sue here, and her sister Rebecca, and their dear friend Robyn. I’m going to do a podcast with Robyn too. Oh, it’s so great. We’ve been having wonderful times together.

Then, of course, we got involved. We began Above Rubies. I didn’t know what I was doing but I just forged ahead in faith. God began to lead me, and all those I involved, just as we went along. I remember saying to my husband, “I don’t know how we’re going to pay for this. I just have this vision.” He said, “Well, don’t come back on me. We’ve got enough bills, thank you!” I felt led to make it by donation.

I remember going to the Christian printers in our city. That was “Gospel Publishing House.” Yes, and I went to them, and I said, “I’ve got this vision to get out a magazine to the mothers of this nation. Will you print it?” Well, I told them, “I don’t really have any money up front. I’m going to make it by donation.” Well, I think usually they would laugh at you. But it must have been God because they didn’t laugh. They said, “We’ll print it.” I couldn’t believe it.

So, I plucked up much courage and printed only 1500 copies. Absolutely nothing to the thousands I print today. But I think that took the most faith because I didn’t know what was going to happen. So, the magazine was printed.

I was sharing at a ladies’ conference in Rotorua, New Zealand. I shared the magazine. I said “Take it wherever you go. Send it to friends. Send it to people. Put it in the waiting rooms of doctors and hospitals and dentists and everywhere you go.” The ladies left that conference, and they began to do it. I began to get letters from all over the nation, from the top to the bottom, saying, “Thank you for this magazine.” And they sent a donation. Wow! I went and paid the printers! It was miraculous.

Sue: It was.

Nancy: Yes, yes.

Sue: I’d like to mention that when Nancy got the vision, we were like an army. We were like a fort.

Nancy: Yes, you are right!

Sue: And all I could think about in this world is people, people. All we wanted was for people to hear about the goodness of God and we went straight into action. There was no worrying about whether we were going to get any help. We were a team, and it was about to bite forward. It was the vision of Above Rubies under the direction of the Holy Spirit and through Nancy.

We were never short of helpers. Everyone just wanted to get on board and help each other, and to see that this vision was brought forth. We learnt lots of things from this vision, being homemakers, mothering, cooking, giving, caring. And also having the fruits of the Spirit, which were love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. “Against such things there is no law.”

We were that army. Seeing that this was happening. We had a force with us and that was the Holy Spirit. We needed it to do this because we had the feminists doing their force, which is not of God. But ours was of God and we were moving. This was a beautiful vision that we could participate and help with.

Nancy: Oh, I know! It’s true, Sue. We were like an army together. We’re all together, because we were all in such unity back there. Another wonderful thing was that Gospel Publishing House so wanted to help us that they said we could come in after their workday closed when we were printing a new magazine. And we could collate the magazines, collage the pages together. Do you remember that?  It wasn’t in the church. We just piled into Gospel Publishing House. We would be there until about midnight collating magazines!

Sue: It was so straight. It was going for the vision and seeing the vision for women of this nation at the time.

Nancy: I know. Here I was, a mother of all these little children. Serene was just a baby. But we were still all in the home. All of us mothers together were part of it. Everybody. In the evening, when a magazine was being printed, the men would come out too. We’d all be collating together. It was so exciting.

The second issue, I printed 5000. The third issue, 25,000. In three years, we were printing 100,000 copies for New Zealand. You couldn’t even go anywhere in the country without bumping into an Above Rubies magazine. I remember driving along the Desert Road. There was just a little restroom. I went in, and even there, there was an Above Rubies waiting! It was so amazing.

But yesterday, we were going through some of the old magazines that were first printed. I noticed that while we were in New Zealand (because we then moved on to Australia) that Sue, you actually were part of five of the Above Rubies magazines. It was so amazing. I’m just picking this one up now. This is # 5 way back in the ‘70’s, because we started in September 1977. This is a magazine from 1978. Here you are.

I did a panel with homemakers, speaking about being homemakers, and here’s your picture, right here. I’m asking here in this panel, “Sue, what does your husband, Jack feel about you being at home?” And you answer, here I’m reading it from the magazine: “My husband enjoys being a real man.”

Sue’s husband was Jack, and he was a married man, such a handsome guy. Such a lovely man. He passed away five years ago. That is such a loss to Sue. But here she says, “My husband is a real man. He loves to be the provider in our household. He definitely does not want me to work outside the home anymore. He likes to come home to a hot meal, and a happy atmosphere, and to a wife who is fresh and loving.” Wow! I love that!

Sue: It moved me.

Nancy: And that was the testimony of your home.

Sue: Doesn’t that make you feel particular, ladies?

Nancy: Oh, yes, yes. And Jack was a great provider, wasn’t he?

Sue: Right. Great provider.

Nancy: Oh goodness me. You’re telling me the legacy he has left your children! Whoo! And now they’re millionaires.

Sue: That’s right.

Nancy: God was good. He is faithful. You could have thought, “Help! I’d better go out and go to work.” But no, you just trusted your husband and he started off being a hard worker. But look how God blessed him and multiplied his vision of being the provider for the home! So incredible.

Then I asked you here, “OK, how do you manage financially, now that you're not working? Because you had been working before and God brought you home.” And you say, I wonder if you remember? “We manage well. I make sure that we have no more than two things on hire purchase at one time.” Well, in America, that’s on installment, or layaway,

“Best of all, I found that as I sought to do what God wants from me as a mother, that God has abundantly showered upon us provisions of food, clothing, and furniture. He’s a wonderful provider! For example, last Easter I was expecting visitors for the weekend. Sixteen people in the house! But as the weekend approached, I lay in bed, wondering how I would provide the food for them all. And then, the very next day, I received a check for $50.”

Well, how much would that be today? Goodness me, help! 45, 48 years ago. “Which I wasn’t even expecting. And extra food arrived from different people. Another time my husband was sick and off work. I’d invited a family for a meal. All I had in the house was meat and potatoes. I just committed it to the Lord, and that very afternoon, a friend arrived with a carton full of vegetables of every description.” And so it goes on, all these wonderful things that you wrote there.  

That was, let me see, oh, the next one you wrote in was # 7. And that was in ’78, the next magazine. And you write your testimony here. “A SOFT ANSWER WORKS” And how in the beginning of your marriage, it was pretty hairy. But then Jack came to the Lord, you came back to the Lord, and things changed hands.

You talked there about, “Are you a nag-bag? I used to be. But now I love to encourage my husband, telling him his good points, and complimenting him. I love to give him soft answers. I have proved over and over again Proverbs 15:1: ‘A soft answer turns away wrath.’” And so on. That was a beautiful testimony.

And then, wow! Let’s see what number this is. This is # 12, and here we did another panel about hospitality. You’re talking in that one, too, all about hospitality. In fact, I remember, Sue, just right in the beginning, when you became the most hospitable woman you could ever find.

But I remember in the beginning, when I was speaking one day at our ladies’ group about hospitality. You came to me, and you said, “Nancy, I so want to ask people, but we’re just on our budget. I don’t know how we could get extra to feed extra.” I said to you, “Sue, just go ahead in faith, and ask a family that is on your heart, and see what God will do.” So, you went ahead in faith and did it. And then . . .

Sue: Knock, knock at the door. A box of groceries that added to the meat and potatoes. I found out it was from a family that had five children, and they didn’t have a lot of money. I’m just saying it was the Lord at the time. He knew exactly what I needed.

Nancy: Yes! And then, from then on, goodness me, you never stopped! You haven’t stopped having people in your home to this day!

Sue: Not to this day, Nancy. I’m going to be 74.

Nancy: Yes, that is so amazing. Oh, yes, and then, let’s see, what’s here? No. 13. This time, it’s actually a beautiful feature page. It’s a picture of your beautiful little boy, Arana. Oh, such a handsome little boy! I wish I could show you this picture. We had a poem with this picture. It was written by Beryl Person. She was another one of the lovely ladies in our fellowship. She wrote this poem. Oh, wow. I should read it out.

My Influence

By my bickering and arguing,

By my loud voice and impatience,

By my condemning and disapproving voice,

I can so hurt this small child of mine.

I can make him want to run and hide.

I can make him afraid and scared of the world.

I can make him into such a nervous child—

 

One who stammers and stutters,

One who feels insecure and very unsure,

One who feels so unloved.

 

BUT

 by my patience and my love,

By my kindness and my care,

By encouragement each day,

I can make him a very different child—

 

One who is unafraid.

One who will face the world with confidence

and self-assurance.

One who will love others as himself is being loved.

 

Who then would dare to stand and say,

“A mother’s role is nothing?”

If you and I can mold a child,

And so affect his future,

Then the role we have

Is the greatest role God can give.

Amen! And then you were in number 17! Here we did another panel. This panel is called “Let’s Encourage One Another.” Do you remember that back then? That was just our lifestyle.

Sue: It was our lifestyle. And it was known in our street. We were known as the “Bible study they had that the talk that went on.” It was incredible. We got ladies into the Bible study. We had ladies give their hearts to the Lord and copied all what we were doing, all the mothering parts of being a mother, and all the hospitality things, and all the cooking, and all the healthy cooking that we were doing as well.

Nancy: Yes, yes! Let me see if I can pick out some of the little things you say in this panel. Of course, there were others in the panel too. This is Sue.

“A wonderful way that I’ve found to encourage people is by posting them a lovely card, with a personal message of encouragement or appreciation. I’ve had so much joy in blessing widows, single mothers, and mothers at home. Every time I do this, it’s always the perfect timing.

“It’s a good idea to have a pile of cards handy for when the Lord lays someone on your heart. I search for hours in bookshops for appropriate cards. One time my next-door neighbor, who knew we were Christians, asked me to pray for a friend of hers who was very ill. For three consecutive days, which was always while I was hanging out the washing, the clothes on the line, the Lord impressed me to send her a card. I shared with her that although I did not know her, I was praying for her. I told her that Jesus loved her and wanted to be her Friend. I told her how she could find Jesus as her Savior. This lady was so blessed by receiving this from me that she found out where I lived and came to thank me. The following day she died. How glad I was that I obeyed the prompting of the Lord.”

Sue: I remember now.

Nancy: And then, I actually share a little testimony in that panel. And it was about your mother! Your mother Maureen Green. And Sue’s mother was a widow. She lived with you, Sue, for how many years?

Sue: Ten years.

Nancy: Ten years. Such a wonderful, godly woman. Anyway, I shared this wonderful testimony. One of the ladies in our fellowship, and in our ladies’ Bible study . . .  It was Maureen’s birthday, Sue’s mother’s birthday. She wanted to do something lovely for her, so she went to the shop, and said, “Lord, show me what I should buy for her.”

And the Lord directed her to a beautiful little vase, and it was just a vase that would only hold one flower. It was so pretty and beautiful.  She took it to your mom. Oh, your mom was so blessed that she would think of her and buy her this beautiful gift.

But God wasn’t finished yet. There was another lady in the fellowship, and she also had Maureen on her heart. She said, “Lord, I want to give her something for her birthday. What should I do?” She thought she’d give her some flowers. So, she goes to the florist shop and looks at all these beautiful bunches of flowers. “Oh,” she said, “I’d just love to get them.  They’re so beautiful!”

And yet she didn’t feel right. She kept walking around, and she found this one flower. It may have been an orchid. I’m not sure. But it was one flower on its own. She knew that’s what she had to buy! “Lord, why am I only buying one flower?” But she obeyed the prompting of the Lord.

A little while later, after Maureen had received this vase, this other lady arrived to bless her on her birthday with the one flower to go in the vase that would only take one flower. Just such a little thing, but both of these ladies were prompted by the Spirit of the Lord. This is the glorious ministry of encouraging one another. It’s supernatural. When we listen to the Lord, His heart, He wants us to encourage. Wow! Miracles take place, don’t they? Oh, yes.

That’s just a little glimpse, ladies, of the early days of Above Rubies, where Sue lived next door to me, and her oldest daughter Rochelle was Pearl’s best friend. Pearl can’t wait to come tomorrow night to Shabbat so she can hear all about Rochelle, and what’s happening, and catch up with her. And then Serene was friends with Hine. They were such wonderful days. What do you want to say, Sue?

Sue: What do I want to say? All those years, and all your years, as women, all the saints that have gone before you are to make you who you are now in this day and age. All that we experienced, all the education that we had over the years with being with people, because life without people . . . When we’re with people, this is how we learn. It’s like an education with us. We learn things that can help us walk in the direction of what we’re meant to be doing and how we choose things. This has been my walk and my life with how to walk with the Lord. That’s always been connected to natural type spiritual people. That’s what Above Rubies is all about as we’ve just heard.

Nancy: I think, Sue, after we left New Zealand, and that was, I was working it out, 43 years since we left New Zealand. So, we are meeting together. This is the first time in 43 years!

Sue: It is.

Nancy: It’s so amazing! But when we left, your life continued. Your life has been one of just pouring out to people. You adopted this little boy. Maybe you could tell us about him.

And then you went on to foster very needy people and you're still fostering one today, at 74 years of age. Our time is getting to an end, but tell us about your adopted boy, and then maybe tell us about the one you are looking after now, even though you've had so many in between.

Sue: My adopted boy. That’s lovely, Nancy. He comes from a background of gang members.

Nancy: That’s quite a big thing amongst the Maori people.

Sue: It is. I was a nurse at Te Awamutu Hospital. One of the social workers came and said, “We’ve got this baby here. He’s been here for three months. Sue, what are we going to do with him?”

I said, “Well, I’ll just take him home as an emergency. But the emergency grew, because I was a woman who loved children, and loved family. I love seeing people go forward in their lives. So, I spoke with all the children. We all sat round the table. I said, “Are we going to have this baby come into our lives?” They said, “Yes.”

Then it came to . . .  there was a gap over the love and attention that this baby was given. Then there was a time when we had to make a decision for the mother to come and stay with us. I was there to put all into this mother, all the things that we had learned through Above Rubies. The mother flourished but still wanted to move on about five hours from us to a place called Auckland. I was to give the baby back.

I gave Matthew back, and it wasn’t too long after when I got a phone call from a social worker saying, “There’s been a baby screaming for one week.” We’ve been to see him. Do you agree to take him?” The baby was Matthew. He hadn’t eaten any food for a week. The mother had taken off and just left him there. They said, “We will fly you to Auckland to pick this baby up.” So, I did that.

When I saw him, he had a dark face. He left my care with a large suitcase of beautiful things, clothes, and diapers. When I picked him up from the airport, he had a paper bag with one diaper in it. It looked like he didn’t know. He just looked terrible. When I got him on the plane, the Lord said to me, “Start singing to him, Sue, like you used to.” I started singing to him in his ear in the plane and I saw this darkness just leave him to life.

He came back into our lives, and then we all had to have another family meeting/get-together to make a decision. Did we want to keep this child and adopt him? We made sure that the children knew that he was going to be equal to all the other children. He is going to be treated no differently. He’s going to be loved like you children are. That’s what we did.

And later on in life, the years have gone. We had a beautiful life with Matthew just like we did with all our children. Then he got into the drug scene, which is very, very sad. We never knew that. And alcohol. That changed his life for a number of years. We’ve always loved him. We always will love him and fight for what he is.

But he’s homeless at the moment, which is hard for a grieving mother who would like him to be set free of that. We love him, and we pray for him. He’s 36 now. When he sees me, he says, “You’re right, Mom? Are y ou alright without Dad?” because my husband’s passed away. He’s with the Lord. Matthew said, “I love you heaps, Mom,” but he still wants to stay in this state. What I’m saying is, I always look at the end result of his life, and I believe by prayer for him, and loving him through it, he will be the Lord’s.

Nancy: Yes. And then, you know, we could be here all day, just hearing the stories of these very needy people that you have continued to foster throughout the years. Just tell us about the one you have now.

Sue: The one I have now? She is cognitively five. She is named Crystal.

Nancy: But she’s about 22.

Sue: She’s 22 years of age, but she’s got the brain of a five-year-old. I’ve had her since she was three, and she’s now 22. She loves the Lord. I’ve had the privilege of leading five children to the Lord, and she’s one of them. She loves going to Sunday school and looking after all the babies.

I’ve had a ministry of leading five children that I’ve had, from very severe autism to physical scoliosis. All these other conditions, heart disease, and four of them have passed onto the Lord during the years that I’ve had them. What a blessing it is to be able to be involved with that!

Nancy: Yes. And you embrace these people that no one else has even been willing to take.

Sue: That’s true.

Nancy: Thank you, Sue. Well, just continue in your beautiful life, just pouring out, not only to your family, but to everyone you come into contact with. Even now, you still have meetings in your home, don’t you?

Sue: Oh, I do. Prayer meetings for Israel, Prayer meetings for the pastors, and worship and praise in the house. I’m helping a woman. I’m going to be getting some tips from Nancy. It’s a shift, 43 years later. I’ll get the feeding from her before I leave. All I can say to you ladies is:

“People, people, people. Love, love, love. Hospitality, hospitality, hospitality.”

Nancy: Amen. Thank you, Sue. It’s been the greatest joy to be with you again.

“Lord, we thank You so much for the way you lead each one of our lives. And Lord God, we pray today for every precious mother and wife listening. And I pray, Lord, that many of them have got wonderful friends around them. Many of them haven’t. And I pray that You will help them to find kindred spirits, Lord God.

“I think back to our days when we were in New Zealand, and Sue was part of so many other mothers. We all learned our mothering together. We shared our joys. We shared our challenges. That was what kept us, well really, always in joy, because we had one another. There’s something powerful about having one another. And I pray that You will help mothers, Lord, who feel isolated, that You will bring to them kindred spirits. Help them to find the right fellowship to be part of. In the Name of Jesus, Amen.”

Blessings from Nancy Campbell

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www.aboverubies.org

Transcribed by Darlene Norris

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DON’T FORGET TO TELL OTHERS ABOUT THIS PODCAST, “LIFE TO THE FULL” WITH NANCY CAMPBELL.” DON’T KEEP THE BLESSINGS TO YOURSELF. IT IS ENCOURAGEMENT FOR ALL WIVES AND MOTHERS.

 

 

LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell

EPISODE 356: GOD’S FAITHFULNESS

Currently Colin and I have precious friends staying with us from New Zealand. Today Rebecca Southey from Auckland, New Zealand, shares her testimony of God’s great faithfulness. Rebecca began her journey as a teen single mother until the father came back into her life.

Listen to what God did in their lives and continued to do. They now rejoice in the blessing of all their children and grandchildren walking with the Lord. What is their secret?

Announcer: Welcome to the podcast, Life to The Full, with Nancy Campbell, founder and publisher of Above Rubies.

Nancy Campbell: Hello, ladies! It’s always so great to be with you. I wish you could be with us here in my lounge today. For here, sitting around on the sofa is a very precious friend. At the moment we have staying with us some wonderful friends from New Zealand, and from way back in the early days when Colin and I were pastoring in New Zealand. Actually, it’s 43 years ago since the time we left the shores of New Zealand. So, it’s really 43 years, or even longer, since I have seen you all!

I have here Robyn from New Zealand, who’s married to a pastor in Texas now. And I have my very, very dear friend Sue. Sue used to live over the road from me. I have her sister Rebecca here with her husband. These three wonderful ladies are here, and they have so many stories to tell. I thought we’d do a podcast with each one of them. So, I’m going to do that!

We’re going to start with Rebecca now. But I’m going to do one with Sue, and one with Robyn, so you’ll be looking forward to their stories, and what they have to say. But we’ve been trying to get on to them all morning, and it’s been impossible, because we’ve just been talk, talk, talk, talk, talking! And it’s lunchtime. But I don’t know. We’re going to have to do these. We’re going to have a late lunch.

But round this room, I have Sue, and Rebecca, and Robyn, and I have Pam. Pam Fields is staying with us too. Pam is the one who’s wanting to do this biography about me. She’s here, getting me on the job of what I have to do. Pam comes every now and then to keep us on the project. And Evangeline is here, catching up.

Of course, I have my two lovely Above Rubies girls, Esther and Teeny, who are my current Above Rubies girls. I got mixed up with Teeny’s name because she is a twin! Her twin, Tiveria, has been with us. She was with us for over two months. And then, her twin came. Her twin’s name is Tikva, but she’s called Teeny for her nickname because she was the one who was smaller, the smaller twin, and they called her “Teeny.”

So, here we are, all together. Now, Rebecca, welcome! Say “hi!”

Rebecca: Hi! Thank you, Nancy. It’s great to be here.

Nancy: Yes, and her New Zealand voice! Now it won’t only just be me, but you’ll get to have some more New Zealand accents!

Rebecca: Well, there you go! [laughter]

Nancy: Rebecca, well, really, we go back a long way. In fact, even before you were married to Rick. You’ve been through a set of pretty hair-raising times! Do you want to tell that part of your story?

Rebecca: Ok. All right. Thank you for inviting me to be part of your podcast today. So very privileged. Thanks for your hospitality and thank you for your love you've given us.

Forty-five years ago, Colin married myself and my husband. Before that time, let me go back a little bit. I was in the church, and I was a teenager. I met this boy, I would say. But he wasn’t in the church. Long story short, when you walk away from the things of God, I ended up a single mom. But with the love of the church, and also the support of yourselves and the family, I was very supported.

But just a little bit of the story was that we were going to get married. Like I said, with the love of my church, love of my family, it seemed like a fairy-tale story. However, not to be so at the beginning, I remember that things were going along. My husband, well, he is my husband now. But at the time, he got baptized actually, this particular on Sunday night.

I remember, there was a prophecy from Colin. The prophecy was that “Rick was a man of indecision, but that God was going to put the right decision in his heart. And that you two should go on to serve the Lord together”. That sounded wonderful, didn’t it?

Well, what happened after that? From the water into the fire! My darling boyfriend at that time, soon to be my husband, we were going to get married a couple of months after he graduated from Police College, decided that getting married, being a father, and all the responsibilities, was not for him. So, away he went, for a good period of time. But you know what? It was the most difficult time, but one of the greatest times, because I gave my heart back to Jesus.

Nancy: Now, you were pregnant at this time.

Rebecca: I was pregnant! I was seven months pregnant.

Nancy: Wow.

Rebecca: Yes, I was seven months pregnant, and it was only three days after he got baptized that he was gone. Devastated! Absolutely devastated. But the Lord got me back. I came home. I gave my life back to Jesus. That was the best place to go.

Then I remember I use to see Rick walking down to town. I would see his car. He used to come and visit a couple of times during the time that I was pregnant. I’d say to God, “Why are You allowing him to do this? Why does he come and visit?” Because my heart was so much for him. I remember God speaking very clearly to me. “You can have him back now, as he is, or you can have him back when I’m finished with him.”

Now, remember I’m only a 16-year-old. There were hopes out there. Yep, nearly 17. So, there’s hope that you can have a personal relationship with God, and He can speak to you. He said to me very clearly, “You can have him back now, as he is, or you can have him back when I’m finished with him.” I said, “Okay. When you're finished with him.” And then I carried on with my life.

On the 16th of March 1979, our son was born. His name was Johnathan. Again, I had a very supportive family. I lived with my sister, who’s here today. You’re going to hear her story, and her awesome husband at the time, he’s passed on to be with the Lord. And our mother, and Jack, and Sue’s children. We certainly have a dynamic family.

Therefore, I knew the support and love of family and the church family. You know, sometimes when you find yourself in that situation, being a pregnant, younger woman as it happens, or being pregnant, that you can feel shamed, maybe isolated at times, because of your own thinking, and the doing of your life at that time. But when you know the love of family, obviously the love of God, but the love of others around you, your church, you can go forward. I had Johnathan and that was great.

Seven months later, and there’s a lot of stuff in between, but all that stuff in between was, when there was pain, God was there. When you felt discouraged, hope was there. And I did my life. I remember making a conscious decision at a very young age. Now I’m 17 when he was born. I made a very conscious decision that I was going to be the best mother that this child could have.

Much as my heart was for his father. I had to, in one way, cut that off. My decision was that I was going to be the best mom. And I was. I could be the best mom, because I had role models around me to show me the path. I had my mom, I had my sister, I had Nancy. The women in the church, just by modelling it. They didn’t say, “Do it this way, do it that way.” We saw how they loved their children. We saw how they embraced motherhood, and that’s what I did, as a 17-year-old.

But moving right along, I still believed God. And He said, “You can have him back now, or you can have him back when I’m finished with him.” So, let’s go to the finished product, shall we?

One day, contact was made. He came to visit me. He was a policeman, and he was moving from where he was living at the time in Whanganui, where we were setting up house. Remember my broken heart. We’d already made plans to get married. We’d already got a house in Whanganui, but it had all gone. He was living in Whanganui, and now he was moving to Wellington. He came to see me, and he came to see Johnathan.

He stayed in Palmerston North for a week with his mother and father and family. He came to visit, and he said, “I want to get back together.” My heart was boom, boom, boom, boom, boom! But no. I said, “Look, let’s take it very slowly. Come and visit Johnathan for a week, and let’s see what happens.” I told my mother. She was like, “Oh, no! Please don’t set yourself up for disappointment!”

“It’ll be OK, Mom!” Mom respected me now that I was an adult. I was a woman, because I was a mother, but she’s also a mother too

So, he came around for a week, and it was lovely. The bonding of Johnathan and Rick was amazing. We were in a friendship, even though I was still madly in love with him. But I loved God even more.

The last night that he was in Palmerston North, he said, “Shall we go to the movies?” We didn’t get into the movies because he said to me, as we were getting out of the car, as he opened the door he said “Well, what have you been doing for the last nine months?” I was just about ready to go “What? apart from nappies and looking after this child”

Nancy: By the way, not all Americans will know nappies, because they call them “diapers” here. But back in New Zealand, they’re “nappies.”

Rebecca: They’re nappies!

Nancy: Yes!

Rebecca: So, diapers, too. Anyway, I said to him, “Apart from nappies, and looking out for this baby by myself, well, actually, Rick, what I had done, is I’ve given my heart back to Jesus, and if I had to choose between Him and you right now, I’d choose Him.”

Now, ladies, I’m thinking, “Who the heck said that??” Who was sitting on my shoulder to say that? Because my motives were starting to come up because I still loved this man. But I very clearly, I chose Him.

Richard said, “That’s what I needed to hear,” because he had been running from God for nine months. “I had a car accident in the police car. I went to look for this couple while I was setting up my own flat. They were born-again Christians. I couldn’t stand it. I had to leave.” He said, “I even went to take out this girl in Whanganui, and she said, ‘Meet me at the station. Blah, blah, blah.’ Because I actually, whatever I was doing.”

Then Rick said, “I asked her what she was doing, and she said, ‘I was street witnessing. I’m a backslidden Christian.’” He said, “That date, that night out together was actually one of the catalysts to get him thinking about life and getting straight.” He said, “I never saw that girl again. She was only telling her story, and I said mine, and we never saw each other again. I’ve been running from God.”

Here is the exciting part. I said, “Great!” So, Colin and Nancy had a lot to do as our pastor. Rick said, “I need to ring Colin now.” It was 11 o’clock at night.

I said, “What? Really?”

“Yes now.” He rang their home at 11 o’clock at night. Colin answered. “Hello?” Rick said, “I want to give my life back to the Lord. I need to come and see you.” Colin said, “Can it not wait until the morning?” Rick goes, “No. Now!” Just in genuine love, Colin said, “Come on. Come now.”

They put the fire on and stoked it up. We were in the lounge, and Rick was repenting, giving his heart back to Christ. In February just gone we have been married for 45 years, and Colin took the wedding.

So, I get my encouragement when God speaks. No matter what age you are ladies, when you know you have that Word, that He does not lie, no matter how difficult it is to stay focused on the things of God, and the promises of God, when we do, we reap the rewards. We’ve been married 45 years.

PLANTED IN THE HOUSE OF THE LORD

Hey, it’s had its ups and downs. It’s had its ups and downs. That’s what life is all about. But I dealt with my dysfunctions. We were kids. We were children when we got married, so it’s important that we grow together. But one thing we did, even after we got married, we moved down to Wellington where we set up house there. The first thing we looked for was a church.

Then we got transferred again to another town. What did we look for? A church. And we remained in the house of the Lord. Because “those that are planted in the house of the Lord, they will flourish. In the courts of our God, they will bring forth fruit in old age.” I love that. That’s what kept us being in the house of God and knowing the love of God.

Nancy: Oh, yes. That’s such a wonderful testimony. If you want to look that Scripture up in the Word, it’s Psalm 92:13, 14. Look it up. I think it is so powerful. I do know, of course, in our own lives, there’s nothing like being planted. You’re planted in the house of the Lord. When you find a place, and you make your roots there, it is so important, isn’t it? Not just flitting around from church to church.

You’ve got to find roots because that’s God’s heart. He wants us to be planted. He wants us, as mothers, to be planted in the home. He wants us to be planted in a church family. That’s so important for the raising of our children. You found that. As you began then the Lord gave you four children.

Rebecca: Amazing children.

Nancy: Now you have all these grandchildren.

Rebecca: Oh, eleven! Sinless, perfect, and we’re deluded! But no, they’re amazing. [laughter]

Nancy: And they’re all walking with the Lord today.

Rebecca: All our children are walking with the Lord. Our grandchildren are walking with the Lord because they are planted. Their parents are planted in the house of the Lord. Their grandparents are planted in the house of the Lord. That’s the only safety there is for our children, for families, is in the house of God.

Nancy: And I love those Scriptures of promises that God gave to Israel when He said, “I’m going to . . .” They were taken out of the land, but God was faithful, and He said, “I’m going to bring you back to the land, and I’m going to plant you in the land again, and you will not be plucked up.”

That’s the thing. What is the opposite of planting? Plucked up.

We are either a planted person, or we’re a plucked-up person. We’re either a mother planted in the home, and in our marriage, and in our family, or we are plucked up.

There are many who are plucked up today. The same in the church. We are either planted in the church, or we are plucked up. God’s plan is for us to be planted.

Rebecca: Amazing.

Nancy: Isn’t it? Oh, let’s just read them again. Psalm 92:12: “The righteous shall flourish like the palm tree: he shall grow like a cedar in Lebanon. Those that be planted in the house of the LORD shall flourish in the courts of our God. They shall still bring forth fruit in old age.” Isn’t that so great?

Rebecca: It’s so exciting, isn’t it?

Nancy: “They shall be fat and flourishing.” Hallelujah! Amen! And you’ve proved that, because today all your children are walking with the Lord, and all your grandchildren. But there were a couple of hiccups along the way. Tell us how you trusted God in those situations.

Rebecca: Oh, I so want to tell you all, ladies. There were hiccups. When you are planted in the house of the Lord, we’re sure that we worked on ourselves, and listened to the Word, and applied it to our lives, and taught our children the love for the house of God. We were there Sunday after Sunday. We were part of the ministry. They knew at a young age that they were going on Sunday. We do it because we love God. It’s part of who we are, and the legacy that was taught.

Now they’re grown up and are young adults. Not married. I remember God bringing His Word to us that “All your children shall be taught of the Lord, and “great shall be the peace of them” (Isaiah 54:13). Rick and I were pastors at this time in Palmerston North. We had our children. Two of our children decided that they knew better, and they were going to go down another path.

No. This is why my husband, and I had planted a church. The church was flourishing. God was blessing us with this church and the people in it. We had these two, and my husband would stand up and preach. He’d preach faith, and he’d say, “One day you will see my daughter come back through those doors. One day you will see my son. One day you will see them, and you will know them, because they would have given their lives back to Christ.”

This is his preaching faith while he had to have faith himself. That’s what grew our church. It was a real, because we revealed that we’re going through something, but believe in faith. But God said, “All your children shall be taught of the Lord, and great will be the peace of them.”

We carried on daily lives. We were blessed with a lovely granddaughter. We found out our daughter was going to have a baby. They weren’t married. Well, the love that I received before we had our daughter as well and the Holy Spirit really prompted us that we strived for a relationship.

It’s important to have relationship with your children, for them to know you, and for you to know them. There’s no judgement that would come into our house, even though we were pastor. What does that mean? You should be even more loving. Probably even more relational.

But she got pregnant and then they had a son. He was out doing his thing. But our door was always open. Every Monday night we started dinner at our home. All our children would be there, including our son, including our daughter. That was their time around the table that we would talk and love on each other. Then they would go and do their thing. OK. But they knew where home was.

Then one day, Rick and I were talking about things, and again the word of the Lord came to us. It was: “This is My covenant that I will make with you” (Isaiah 59:21) “My spirit that is upon you, and My words that are in your mouth, will not depart out of the mouth of your children, nor your children’s children, from this day forth and forever more.”

“Hello, Lord? Our two children are out there. “This is about Me,” the Lord said. About Him. “This is My covenant that I’m making with you.” We’re like, “OK, thank You, Lord. But I remember times. Let’s be real. There were tears behind closed doors. There were praying and tears.

Another promise that came from God was Jeremiah 31:16: “Stop crying and wipe your eyes; for your work shall be rewarded, for your children shall return from land of the enemy. They will return again to their own border.” Oh, we just took that on board with faith. We wiped the eyes, and we keep doing life. We kept doing life, loving those children.

Well, let’s just move right along. We believed God, that He was true to His word. Anyone hearing today, we have seen the Scriptures fulfilled. All our children are in the house of God. All our children are happily married, and their spouses love God. All our children love God, and all our grandchildren are planted in the house of God.

Never ever think that God doesn’t come through for us, because again, we often say at different times, that He gives us His promises. I don’t know how, and I don’t know when, but I know Him. He has spoken it. That’s more important for us as a family because families still go through stuff.

We’ve all had situations, circumstances, that you’re confronted with. But together, with the foundations of Christ, when our family is built on Christ, the parents particularly remain focused. You know, we truly believe, and it’s taught in our church, “What walks in the parents, runs in the children, and sprints in the grandchildren.” Isn’t that true, ladies?

I look at our children and they went to different levels of sporting achievements, and they were very good at what they put their hand to. Basketball—our sons played national basketball, went to America, got a scholarship, but they came back and didn’t pursue it.

I have a grandson who’s in America, Arizona, got a scholarship, and he’s in the Eastern Arizona College. And he’s playing baseball. He's doing extremely well. So, what walked in his grandparents, the odd netball game and everything else he played for exercise. It ran a bit more in the children.

Even our girls are fantastic at netball. Any sport they play, they’re amazing. But it stopped there. Now the grandson is in America. I have other grandsons who have been to America with basketball. And Australia. That’s just an example of what walks in the parents, runs in the children, sprints in the grandchildren.

How much more in the Spirit? How much more, and how important is it, ladies, that we have a personal relationship with Christ? What walks in us, although we like to know that we run and we do certain things that won’t walk with us. We’re passing on to the next generation that’s going to take it to another level. And then the grandchildren’s spirits are going to take it to a whole new level.

I honestly find that with our children, they recognize Rick and I are still on fire for Jesus. We still love them. My husband is still the head of his family, but he respects the beautiful sons-in-law that we have, and our beautiful sons-in-law, do you know what? They look to Rick also, their father, for words of encouragement, for words of high-five. They high-five each other but they look to their forefathers as well.

All our children love Christ. All our children love the Lord. We’re sitting in a very happy place. But there’s so much more. There’s so much more for us to do for Christ. Sometimes we think . . . I think sometimes . . .  “Gosh, Lord, I’m not doing enough!” And I am involved in our church. I do work. I’m a flight attendant. I’m 63 years old.

I’m a flight attendant. I’m with each flight, up to 118 passengers, each flight. I do four flights a day. So, I have opportunities to be Christ to people. When they’re nervous. I look at them and I put my hand on their shoulder. and I say, “It’s OK, you're on the safest flight today.” They said, “Am I?” I say, “Yes, because I’m on it and I’m guaranteed to go home.”

Now I don’t know that I’m going home to glory or I’m going home to my family, but they feel encouraged. It’s OK, because Christ is in us ladies, the hope of glory. Wherever we go, wherever we put our feet, wherever we place our hands, we bring hope, and we bring life. And that’s what we’ve imparted in our children.

Sometimes I think, “Oh, Rebecca, you're not doing much.” And I get a frown look from my husband. Then he’ll go, “All the things that your children are doing, all the people that they are reaching that you don’t reach, all the places they go . . .”

We have a grandson that’s visually and hearing impaired. He looks, because he’s got hearing aids and because he’s got big thick glasses. They’ve got a diagnosis, and it wasn’t a good one. But my beautiful daughter, our youngest daughter and her husband chose not to listen to that diagnosis, but they put their faith in Jesus, and he got prayed at his dedication. His grandfather held him, my husband Rick, you know, the runner? When God finished with him, oh, it’s so good! In his arms when he was born, we were there. My husband took him in his arms and prayed for him, and he got dedicated. We got the diagnosis and prayed for him again. If he was in this room right now, you wouldn’t think he was hearing impaired. You wouldn’t have any idea that he’s visually impaired. He picks himself up and he goes for it. We’ve got parents that teach him sign language, they do the whole deal. But faith.

I said to my daughter. You pull from your grandfather, which was my father, my sister, Sue’s father. We had a sister who was a spina bifida, and you remember, Nancy, you wrote an article, mom wrote an article before she passed away about the miracles that took place with our sister who had spina bifida. She couldn’t walk.

My father and mother, by faith, took her to the elders in Wellington. The preacher prayed for her. Nothing happened immediately, but Lord, we’re waiting. Every night Dad would pray and say, “We did what You said, Lord. We’re waiting for the miracle.” Lois was one year, and she kicked. I said to Rachel, and I said to one of my other nieces that has a child that’s not too well. I said, “You pull from the faith of your grandfather.”

Yes, we have our own faith. Yes, we have God. He’s ultimately everything. But each generation, we go back and say, “Your grandfather had the faith for your aunty. He had the faith, and it was done. You have pulled that faith that’s in our legacy. That’s in our line of faith.”

And look at our grandson. It’s just amazing. He’s healed. As far as we’re concerned, he’s healed. Every time he goes back for check-ups, they say, “Nothing’s changed.” But they can’t put their finger on why he looks like he does, speaks as well as he does, moves as well as he does. It’s God. Faith, without it we can’t please Him.

So much so that when I was adopted, that’s a little piece I guess we didn’t bring up. I was adopted into a beautiful family that I’m in with Susan. My father called me, and my mom called me “Rebecca Faith.” The reason why I got told by my mom they called me “Faith” is because they got me by faith. Because I’m Maori. Have you ever heard of the Maori?

Nancy: That’s the native people in New Zealand.

Rebecca: Native people. I’m Maori, and my family are European. So, we have a white and a brown family. So, faith, it’s incredible. I know we need to go, but by faith, did my parents not know that my sister Sue’s husband, Jack, who passed away five years ago, who loved the Lord, we found out four years before he died, we were biological family.

Nancy: Really?

Rebecca: Yes. My grandfather, yes, my grandfather, and his (Jack’s) great-grandmother were brother and sister. Brother and sister.

Nancy: So, you were actually related to Jack.

Rebecca: Yes! And all these years, people keep saying to us, “Gosh, Arana, Sue and Jack’s son, and our son Johnathan, gosh! They look alike!” I don’t know, just if it was environment, how they were brought up. OK. No! They were cousins!

Nancy: Isn’t that wonderful?

Rebecca: Jack’s mother and I are first cousins, and Jack and our children are second cousins. But our children go, “No, he’s uncle! He’s our uncle.” But now Arana is contacting our son Johnathan to find out about the lineage of the Werepa line. When we went to the urupa (the cemetery or burial ground in Maori) to bury Jack we saw the headstone. My birth mother’s surname was Werepa. We saw the headstone of Rangi Werepa which was an aunty too.

Nancy: Wow! Isn’t that so amazing? You’ve talked about faith, Rebecca, but that word in the Greek for “faith” is the same word as “faithfulness.” God has been so faithful. When you think that your Rick, this runaway guy, the moment you got married, you’ve stuck to the Lord and stuck to one another. And you've been faithful to him, and God has been faithful to you.

Rebecca: He certainly has.

Nancy: Oh, your testimony is just one of faithfulness, isn’t it? I love how you were sharing with me this morning that now, even all the children have all grown, married, and raising their own families, but you still get the families together every week. Every week, the whole family comes together. You are a gatherer. You make sure that you're getting together, even though you're in the third generation.

Rebecca: And even though they’re adults, you've got to listen. You’ve got to listen to their conversations. We listen. Rick listens to what’s going on. It might be sometimes you’re going to have to tweak a few things. Not publicly, but that’s what a father does, because a father wants to keep his family together.

Don’t get me wrong, ladies. We’re not all perfect. We’ve had our own dysfunctions we had to deal with. And there was stuff that we needed to sort out. But I’ll tell you what, I wish I could give you my eyes now, to where we are sitting, because it’s so worth it!

Remain in God. Remain in the house of God.

JUST TURN UP

We just celebrated 45 years, as you know. Our pastor asked us, “What’s the secret?” Psalm 92. “Those that are planted in the house of the Lord.” We should be divorced today. We shouldn’t be together, ladies. Sixteen, eighteen, seventeen, nineteen, getting married. But the faithfulness of God. And being faithful, just turn up!

Even if it’s not feeling good, turn up! Even if you don’t feel like going to church, just turn up. The Holy Spirit and the rest of the people around will carry you. Just turn up. You may think that things aren’t going well with your children but take them to the house of God.

Nancy: Amen! Well, Rebecca, I end every podcast by praying for all the mothers and wives. Would you like to do that today? Pray for them.

Rebecca: I will. Thank you, Nancy.

“Father, I thank You. As it’s already been spoken of Your faithfulness. I thank You, Lord. You watch over us. And Lord, that You know the plans that You have for our lives. You know the plans You have for our lives. They are to give us hope, and to give us a future.

“I pray for every listener today. I pray Holy Spirit, that You will bring to remembrance those things that are applicable today, for their situations, for the future, they might know of someone else, we speak hope today. We speak faith today. We pray faith today into the hearts and lives of these beautiful women. Those mothers that need to know that what they’re doing is for eternity. What they’re doing is eternal.

“I pray that, Lord, You would watch over every household, watch over every life, and they would bring glory to You. Because, Lord, ultimately, that’s what we want to do. We want to share hope for others. So, bless all the listeners. Bless all these women. Bless all these women doing life today. And I love You, Lord. We honor You. We give You all the glory. In Jesus name.”

Blessings from Nancy Campbell

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www.aboverubies.org

Transcribed by Darlene Norris

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DON’T FORGET TO TELL OTHERS ABOUT THIS PODCAST, “LIFE TO THE FULL” WITH NANCY CAMPBELL.” DON’T KEEP THE BLESSINGS TO YOURSELF. IT IS ENCOURAGEMENT FOR ALL WIVES AND MOTHERS.

MY WOBBLY FAITH

In the above transcript, Rebecca shared how her sister Lois was born with spina bifida. I printed this testimony about Lois in the No. 3 Above Rubies, away back in 1978 while still living in New Zealand.  I’ll print the story again for you here now.

How thrilled and grateful I was when my young daughter, Lois gave birth to a big bouncing baby boy. She had a perfect pregnancy and an easy natural birth. Little Joshua was my 15^th grandchild, so why was it so special?

I thought back to a day 21 years ago when I lay on a hospital bed with a gynaecologist/physician/surgeon surrounding me saying that this pregnancy must be terminated! This was because of my acute physical condition and the risk of childbirth. My previous pregnancies and births had been very difficult, and they did not think I could survive this one.

I was faced with an issue of life and death. How could I destroy life which God had put within me? No. I couldn’t allow it, even at risk to myself. I remember saying to the physician, “My faith is wobbly, but I will wobble on with the help of God” and I went through the pregnancy.

Lois was born with difficulty at five weeks premature, RH negative, and spinal bifida! She was operated on at two days old to close the opening. After the operation there was no reaction or sign of reflexes. Her legs just dangled. The doctor said they had done all they could.

My husband and I had many times experienced a touch from the Lord and so we turned to Him again. We took her to Wellington where a visiting evangelist from America prayed for her.

Nothing apparent happened, but my husband, being a man of faith, kept telling the Lord what we had read in His word: “They shall lay hands on the sick and they shall recover” (Mark 16:18). Each night as we put her to bed he would say, “Lord, we’re still waiting. We thank You that this baby will walk.”

The night she was one year old we were bathing her and suddenly she moved, and her legs kicked for the first time. What excitement as the whole family came crowding in the tiny little bathroom. Such shouting and rejoicing.

From this day on she grew stronger and began to hold her head which she could not do before. We decided to treat her from this day just as we had our other five

We had many opportunities to tell of Jesus and His love through what people saw happening over a space of time.

At 15 years she was last seen by the specialist who was surprised that she was just like any normal girl. However, he did say that if one day she should marry and have a child that she would need ti give birth by c-section. How wonderful is the goodness of God that she had a beautiful natural delivery.

We have been a family who have known what it is to have sickness come our way, but we have seen the Lord’s hand on our lives and have been granted the ability to rise above it.

I strongly recommend this wonderful friend, Jesus Christ, to anyone needing healing, whether it be spiritual, physical, or emotional.

MAUREEN GREEN (who passed away many years ago).

(Maureen is also Sue’s mother who did the podcast, A LIFE POURED OUT, and Rebecca’s mother who shared her story in the above transcript).

 

LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell

EPISODE 355: WE MUST NOT BE DECEIVED, Part 2

What are the areas where most women are deceived today? Come on in and check it out.

Announcer: Welcome to the podcast, Life to The Full, with Nancy Campbell, founder and publisher of Above Rubies.

Nancy Campbell: Hello, ladies! Here we are together again, and another little reminder for the April Easter Family Weekend coming up at Laguna Beach in Florida. This is our annual family retreat in Florida. Make sure you don’t miss! Oh, you're going to so love it! If you've never been before, you're missing a most wonderful experience. It’s not just for parents, but for young people also, and for the whole family. Go to AboveRubies.org, and you’ll be able to find the information there.

We also have another family camp booked for Gatlinburg, East Tennessee. That’s in August, the 22^nd through the 25^th. So, you can pop that on your calendar too. And married couples, if you want to get a special getaway together, you can have your wonderful time alone together. But also, time for getting together with other wonderful couples. That’s going to be in June in Cancun, Mexico.

You can look up the webpage, AboveRubies.org, to find the information on that, too. That’s going to be special. They’re now closing the rooms booked especially for us and opening them to the general public. But you can still get in. The more we get in pretty quickly, the more we will have of our togetherness which will be so wonderful.

Well, today we are continuing on this subject of deception, and especially how we, as women, can be prone to deception. We ended last week on Romans 1, how that not only was it the woman who was the first to be deceived back in the very beginning of time, but also, we see that she was the first one to turn away from her natural maternal function.

It’s interesting that I often think, I mean, those people would hate to even think of my mentioning this, but it’s a fact that women were also the first to change their way of clothing into wearing more men’s clothing. Today, most people, most women, and most women even in church, wear men’s clothing. Not exactly like men, of course, but they wear pants.

And yet, it’s interesting, it was the women who did that first. Even today, if we see a man cross-dressing and wearing a dress, we want to vomit. That’s just disgusting. And yet, somehow the women brought that in. We have to watch this, women, of how we can be deceived, and how deception has such power, because Eve’s deception, and we learned how she was “thoroughly hoodwinked,” her deception had power to convince Adam to sin.

I know, even in my own life that we, as women, although God has planned that we are to honor and to submit to our husbands that they are the leaders. But at the same time, we also have such incredible power to influence our husbands for good or for bad. If we are influencing them in the wrong way, that can have devastating consequences.

God created us to be their helper. We know that. God said, “I am going to make a helper for you, Adam.” This is who He created us to be. Now that doesn’t mean to say we are inferior in any way. No, of course, we are to help our husbands but we’re not just an inferior helper. We are a divine helper.

It’s an amazing mandate, because that word “helper” is first used about a woman, but it is actually the same word that is used of God’s attribute of Him as our Helper. Oh, how wonderful that we have God as our Helper, who comes to our aid! This same word is a divine word. It’s one of God’s attributes and yet it was first given to the woman.

And God has given us attributes that are specifically designed for us. They’re different from the man but they will bring such help and blessing to the man. He has attributes that we don’t have. This is the glorious thing about God’s creation of male and female. Each one is so different. Each one of us have godly attributes that are different from the other. We don’t have to try and be like the other. We as women don’t have to try and take the man’s place. Let’s just embrace our role. As we do, it all fits in so beautifully, and we live in the blessing that God has designed for us.

Now, let’s look a little bit more at 1 Timothy 2:14. We saw there that she was “fully deceived.” But then I want to look at another part of that Scripture, and some different translations.

The Complete Jewish Bible says: “It was not Adam who was deceived, but the woman who, in being deceived, became involved in the transgression.”

The Young’s Literal Translation, a very literal translation. This was the guy who wrote the Young’s Concordance. We have the Strong’s Concordance, and we have the Young’s Concordance. This one says: “The woman, having been deceived into transgression came. It was her deception that caused her to transgress.”

Now, what is that word “transgression”? It's parabasis, meaning, “a going over, a violation, a stepping over the line, a going beyond a command.” This is what Eve did in the very beginning. As she listened to the serpent and as she was being deceived, what was really happening? She was taking on her husband’s role.

Instead of submitting to him, instead of saying, “Wow! Let me talk to my husband,” or “Adam,” because Adam was right there. “Adam, what do you think?” Instead of coming to Adam, she took on that role of leadership. That’s the word “transgress.”

It was going over beyond where she was meant to be. It was a stepping over the line. What happened there was an exchange of their distinctive positions and functions. Eve was the one who began leading, whereas Adam began listening to his wife. It tells us that, right here in Genesis 3:17.

We read here, when God spoke to Adam, and He says: “Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife  (because you listened to Eve) and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat oft: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life.”

But the first thing God said is, “Adam, you listened to your wife. I made you the leader. I told you; I was the One Who told you first about the Tree. You are the one to teach, and lead, and cover, and protect your wife. And you were standing right there. But you listened to your wife instead of Me.”

Wow, that’s challenging, isn’t it? We want our husbands to listen to us, of course. It is good that a husband will listen, and, of course, he’s meant to listen to his wife talk to him. But he has to be also guarded that he doesn’t listen to deception, because we can get into deception When we get into the deception of our stepping-out of our role and taking the leadership. It can be very destructive. Really, that’s what happened there, back there in the Garden.

So, we see this here in 1 Timothy 2:14. I’m going back to it again. “And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and love and holiness and self-control.” Here, this passage is in the context of deception. It is a deception of the truth.

But it says here that the woman will be saved. She’ll be saved from deception. It’s not talking about being saved and being born again, and that she’s going to miss out on eternal life. No, she’ll be saved from deception by embracing childrearing and mothering. This is her role. This is what God created her for.

Ultimately, not every woman is going to get married, although the majority will. And not every woman will have the privilege of birthing a baby from her womb, although the majority will. This is what God primarily created us for, for the bringing forth of His children, His Image into the world, and nurturing, and mothering, and training these children that God gives to her. This is our ultimate career.

The Word of God is saying here, “Yes, we can be prone to deception, but if we will embrace our role that God has given us, this maternal role, this mothering role, this child birthing role, that we will be saved from deception.”

This is very true, because when a woman decides to leave her home and her mothering, that which God intended for her, and even created her physically for, she can be prone to become more deceived in other areas. In fact, she will be deceived into stopping more children because it’s very difficult to keep having children in the home and training them for God when you're out in a career. It doesn’t quite work. There will be many other areas where she will be deceived.

GOD’S WONDERFUL PROMISE TO WOMEN

But this word “saved,” “She will be saved in childbearing,” it’s not meaning that she’s going to be saved from a painless childbirth, although there are some women who do have painless childbirth, but that is not what it is saying here. She’ll be saved when she embraces this role. That word “saved” is sozo.

Oh, what a glorious word it is! It doesn’t only mean “saved.” It means “saved, delivered, protected, healed, and made whole.” Wow! That is incredible! Wow! You couldn’t get anything more wonderful than that. Do you want to not only be saved, but delivered, protected, preserved, healed, and made whole? Well, that’s the promise to you when you embrace your childbearing and childrearing.

That word where I said, “made whole,” those are the very words that Jesus used so often when He was healing people. He would heal them, and He would say: “Your faith has made you whole.” That’s the word sozo. Every time you read those words, “And they were made whole,” it’s sozo, because that is the full meaning.

That word is used for salvation. It is also used for healing. It’s also used for preservation, and what a wonderful promise that is! You will be preserved, even physically. You’ll be saved from deception. You’ll be preserved. Your body will be preserved.

There are many women who are so deceived that they think, “Oh, goodness me, if I have too many children, well, that’s going to be too hard on my body. I want to preserve and look after my body.” We all want to preserve our bodies physically. But you're going to be preserved through childbearing. God created your body to function this way, and you will actually be preserved.

Oh, it is such a wonderful promise! But once again, women today, in our society, are deceived. They think that mothering and birthing and breastfeeding will be a negative to their physical body. No, it is absolutely the opposite. We only have to look at these examples.

I have around me so many women who are part of my life. This is just personal. I’m sure you know so many too. Maybe this is a testimony of yourself as you are listening. But some of them have six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven children, and they are perfectly beautiful. Their physical bodies are still glorious! They still look wonderful. They’re not out of shape.

It is not having babies that gets you out of shape. It is the way we eat and the way we live. No, there are mothers with big families, and they are in perfect shape. There are mothers with only one or two children who are out of shape. That’s not determined by childbearing. We can claim that promise of preservation.

OK, we must guard against these deceptions, even the deception of home. This is such a deception today, because we look out across the church today. You can go to many churches. Of course, there are many where there are lots of wonderful, big families, but there are other churches, perhaps the main churches where there are hundreds or thousands of people going.

What is the testimony of all the mothers? Most of them only have one, two, or three children. Most of those mothers are out at work. Most of those mothers are putting their children in daycare. This is looked upon as the norm in the Christian church. But that is not the norm according to the Bible.

Even the passage in Titus, where the older women are to teach the younger women, they are to teach them to be “keepers at home” because there in the home they are raising their children. They’re embracing their childbearing, and their childrearing, their mothering. We cannot truly mother if we’re not in the home watching over our children.

When God gives us a baby, when He gives us children, He doesn’t give them to us to give them to somebody else to raise. He gives them to us! He’s given us a home. Yes, our home is our gift to us, a sacred place for us to raise our children in peace and in joy, and without all the storms that are around us.

Oh, as women go out into the workforce, into that career world, they face so many storms and difficulties. Of course, we face difficulties in rearing children too, but we are in the home. It’s amazing how we can find blessing and help and deliverance for the difficulties we face when we are in the home. When we are out of the home, we are not being covered. We are not really where God’s covering is. His covering over women is in the home.

IN THE RECESSES OF THE HOME

I love that the New Testament talks about “keepers at home.” We go back to the Old Testament, and we read that picture of God looking upon the family. He says in Psalm 128:3: “Your wife is like a fruitful vine in the heart of your home.” That’s a modern translation. It’s the true meaning, but the actual Hebrew word is the word yerekah. It literally means, “in the recesses of the home,” which is the heart, the heart of the home.

The true mother is in the heart of the home and her heart is in her home. This is where God sees the mother, in the very recesses, in the heart of the home, in that protected place, raising her children for God.

There will come a time when she has to let them go. In fact, when she is sending them forth to be arrows in this world, to reveal the Image of God, and children who will be walking in truth, and fulfilling all the principles that she has poured into them. That day will come. It comes too soon, actually, far too soon.

I remember, as each one of my children was ready to leave home. I always said, “Oh, but I haven’t had enough time! I haven’t had enough time to put into them all that I wanted to pour into them!” Oh, dear, dear precious mothers, mothering is not just some part-time job. It is your life! There’s never going to be enough time! It’s going to go so quickly.

You’ve got to use every moment to pour into your children God’s ways and His principles, and His lifestyle, and living that lifestyle in your home, so they will grow up to live it in their homes. This is what He wants us to do. Make the most of it. It will go so quickly. And then, OK, they’re out on their own. They’ve only got what you put into them.

Yes, that’s what it talks about, isn’t it, in Proverbs 6. I’m just thinking of that now. Proverbs 6:20. What does it say here? “My son, keep thy father's commandment, and forsake not the teaching of thy mother: Bind them continually upon thine heart, and tie them about thy neck. When thou goest, it shall lead thee; when thou sleepest, it shall keep thee; and when thou awakest, it shall talk with thee. For the commandment is a lamp; and the law is light; and reproofs of instruction are the way of life.”

That’s talking there, of putting into them when they’re young, for when they go out, that teaching, that which we have put in them will continue to lead them. It will keep them, even when they’re sleeping. When they’re awake, it will talk with them and remind them of the lifestyle they’re meant to live. This all comes back to the mother in the home.

And what does it continue? “Thy wife is like a fruitful vine in the heart of thy home. Thy children, like olive plants, all around your table.” Breakfast, lunch, and supper, sitting around the table, eating together. When a mother is out in her career, she’s not there at the table with her children. Oh, that is one of the biggest things she’s missing out on. And it totally grieves me.

When I hear of mothers, oh, they may just be doing a part-time job. Oh yes, you're only working part-time. “I just go out in the evenings because my husband is home then.” But ladies, you are missing out on the most important time of the day because I believe the evening meal is perhaps the most important.

It’s that time of the day when you’re not so busy. You’re not rushing to this and that and fathers leaving for work, and you've still got all these things to get accomplished during the day. Evening is time to rest and fellowship. It’s time for you to prepare a meal. That doesn’t happen at the last minute.

Often, you've got to be in the kitchen at four o’clock or at least five o’clock, preparing that meal, preparing that nutritious meal for your family. And then, sitting down together, teaching them how to set a beautiful table, how to sit together at the table, how to have dialog and communication.

And then, of course, that’s all paving the way for the most important part of hearing from God through the Word and praying together. Are you going to miss out on that every evening? That grieves me. No, the mother is meant to be there in the home.

Then we go back to the very, very beginning and we see that when God created the man, He created him before He created the home. It tells us in Genesis that God formed the man, and then He put him in the Garden (Genesis 2:7). But He hadn’t yet created the woman. Oh, no. He had the home ready for her first.

In fact, in that chapter, Genesis 2, we don’t even read about the woman until right down in verse 18! Then it talks about how God is going to create a “helper” for Adam. But he didn’t have her at the beginning. God was getting the home ready. Now He created the man before the home was ready. Not quite sure how he survived. And I’m not sure how it all happened, but I don’t think he left Adam staring into space while He created the first home which was a delightful home, the Garden of Eden.

Eden means “delight.” The first home was a home of delight, the prototype of all homes to come. He created this home. I’m sure He took Adam with him and showed him the principle right at the very beginning of creation that the man is to prepare the home and get it ready for his wife. And then, when the time came when Eve was created and came forth into this world, where did she wake up? She woke up into her home. The home was ready for her, because this was the place where God had planned for her.

Sadly, so many women are deceived about the home today. They think they can just leave their homes and go off in their careers but that is not the truth of the Word of God. Many women too, think much the same thing, really. They really haven’t got the full understanding of their motherhood. Yes, they love their children. Oh, goodness me! Every mother loves her children. Yes! But they don’t love motherhood.

You see, there’s a big difference between loving children and loving motherhood. We can love our children, but we’ll never enter into the total fullness of motherhood if we don’t love motherhood, because motherhood is the ultimate career that God has given to us as mothers.

When He gives us a baby, we enter into motherhood. I know what I’m talking about, because I remember back, back when I first started my motherhood. Well, I loved my babies. I remember when I had my first baby. I didn’t know it was possible to love so intensely. I had never felt so much love in my whole life! Then I had twins. I had three babies in 17 months, and I loved these babies. They were my life.

But I have to confess, I didn’t love motherhood. Oh, I loved my children, but I wasn’t enjoying this motherhood. I thought, “Help! What have I done?” And I wasn’t even going out into a career, but I was, “Oh goodness me! What have I done?” I had up until that time been serving the Lord with my husband.

He had gone out full-time for God when we were engaged. We had been out in the Philippines when we got married, serving the Lord. Now, at this stage, we were back in New Zealand when I had the twins. I thought, “Help! I can no longer serve the Lord! I’m just stuck here in this home, and my husband is still out doing great things for God. And I’m just here with these babies and I’m wasting my life!”

And I cried out to God. God was so good. Little by little, He began to show me, yes, I was in His perfect will! This is how He created me! For this purpose. I was in His perfect will. I was fulfilling the very mandate that He brought me into the world for. I was to embrace these children and mother them and train them for Him and for His kingdom.

And actually, it was the first time in my life, although I’d been brought up in a Christian home, that I embraced my femaleness. I’d never done that before. I always thought, “Oh, wish I’d really been a man. They have a more exciting life.”

But as God began to speak to me and show me, I came to that place for the first time in my life. I said, “Oh God, I thank You for making me a woman, for making me female. You chose to create me female. I embrace with all my heart. I embrace my motherhood. I embrace this role You’ve given to me, to raise these children.”

And as I embraced it, instead of being frustrated, I began to live in the joy of it and the fullness of it. The more I came to understanding of it, and the more I embraced that understanding, the more I was able to walk in the fullness of motherhood, the mandate of a mother being in the home, where this is God’s ultimate plan.

Oh, I know there are mothers who are on their own, even husbands have passed away. They’re on their own. Single mothers, and they’ve got to provide. Some have had to go out to get jobs. God understands. Oh, He understands the mothers who are on their own. God fights for them. The widow, the single mother, God’s heart is for you.

And yet, it’s amazing how even many single mothers and widowed mothers have been able to find a way to work at home. Do something with a webpage or do something where they can do it at home. There are many things that can be done at home. God is able to even work them out.

But I just want to share as we close with some things for those who may be tempted to leave the home. Sometimes we can think, “Oh, we’re not surviving. But maybe I need to go and get a job.” Well, dear ladies, it doesn’t really work. If you trust God, if you trust Him, God will show up, because there are great implications when we leave the home.

I remember reading a quote from a beautiful woman of God, Connie Holmquist, who has now passed away. But she said, “Can you imagine any woman in the Bible leaving their own home, and going out to build up the kingdom of another man or household? No, the virtuous woman puts all she has into building up her own husband’s kingdom.”

Now, there are just one or two things I’d like to mention of what happens when a mother leaves her home.

No. 1. When she leaves her home for another career outside the home, she leaves the sphere God intends for her, the sphere that He planned for her at the very beginning of time.

No. 2. When a mother leaves her home for another career outside the home, she leaves her babies and little children who God has given to her as His love-gift. He doesn’t give them to you to give to anyone else.

No. 3. When a mother leaves her home for another career outside the home, she goes out to make another man wealthy. She serves him, rather than her own husband. She spends finance on cars, gas, clothes, daycare, fast food, and so on.

She can bless her own husband more by being at home with her children, and cooking from scratch, and making everything from scratch. You save so much money by being at home! Oh, you can’t believe how much you can save! Wow! As my husband says, “A husband cannot afford for his wife to go to work outside the home. Too much is at stake.”

No. 4. When a mother leaves her home for another career outside the home, she is no longer fulfilling the biblical pattern God has given in His Word. This may not be modern theology, but it is Bible theology, and it is motherhood theology.

No. 5. When a mother leaves her home for another career outside the home, her children are deprived. No other woman, no matter how caring and affectionate, can take the place of Mother. No one but the mother truly understands the inner needs of her children.

Oh, and it’s unbelievable. You know that today there are many people who raise dogs and so forth to make money. Most dog breeders will not sell their dogs until they’re at least eight weeks. And yet today, mothers will leave babies at six weeks to go out into their career outside the home! Can you even believe that? Even dog breeders will not allow that.

And I was talking to a daycare person recently. She said to me, “I cannot even understand it. Many of the mothers don’t even bother to ask, ‘Well, did my child have a nap today?’ Or how many foods or ask questions about it so that they know when they’re going. They don’t even ask a thing.” Can you believe this? They were made to be mothers.

No. 6 (the last one). When a mother leaves her home for another career outside the home, there is no one at home guarding and guiding the home. We, as mothers, are the watchdogs of our home. Even as our children get older, they may be able to come home from school (because most home mothers are homeschooling) but most working mothers have their children in school. The children can come home and look after themselves. They’re able to do that. But what are they doing? What are they watching? What are they getting into? We are needed in the home as a watchdog. What’s the use of having a watchdog if he doesn’t know how to bark and guard the home? What’s the use of having a mother if she is not there to guard her home?

So, dearest, precious, wonderful ladies, I know that most of you who are listening to me are not deceived. You are in the home. You’re home-workers, home-lovers, home-keepers, oh, home-everything. Praise the Lord! Don’t be ashamed. Never be ashamed of being in the home. Lift up your head and know that you are in the perfect will of God. Share the joy of it with other mothers, so they’ll have such a desire to come home too. Amen.

“Dear Father, we thank You that You have given us our homes to raise our children. They are sacred places that we can fill with Your presence, and Your joy, and the way You want us to live. Help us, Lord God, to create a biblical lifestyle in our homes, a heavenly lifestyle in our homes.

“I pray that You will bless these beautiful homes, loving homes, working homes, making homes, children-raising mothers. Bless them abundantly today. Fill them with joy. Provide miraculously for all their needs. I pray in Jesus’ Name. Amen”.

Blessings from Nancy Campbell

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Transcribed by Darlene Norris

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