MY HUSBAND’S HELPER, Part 2
(The Strengths I Bring to my Marriage and Family)
We learned last week that God created us to be a helper and a strength to our husbands. We are kenegdo—his counterpart, or face to face opposite. God gives many strengths to the man as the leader of the home. He also gives many strengths to the woman, but different strengths. It would be superfluous for us both to have the same strengths. This would only undermine one another.
What strengths does God want us to bring to our marriage?
1. STRONG IN THE LORD
Ephesians 6: 20 states: “Be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.” Do you notice that we do not have strength in ourselves? It is only God’s strength. We are only strong in the power of His might. Therefore, we must be wives who seek after God and His ways, His strength for each new day, and for the battles we face in this life. When we are strong in the Lord we will be a strength to our husband.
Ecclesiastes 4:9, 10 says: “Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.” I know you want to be one who uplifts your husband, not pulls him down.
If we give in to our feelings (which we are prone to do as females), we will be an emotional mess instead of a quiet strength for our husband and children. If we give into self-pity (to which we are also susceptible) we will be no good to our husbands or anyone in our family. Self-pity drains your strength. Self-pity pulls you down to the pits and pulls down your husband.
Instead, we “gird up the loins of our minds,” “cast down imaginations,” and say no to our grumbling self-pity (Psalm 40:2, 3; 2 Corinthians 10:3-5; James 4:7; and 1 Peter 1:13). We turn from our slough of despair and turn to the Lord. We confess that we trust Him, no matter what our situation. We confess He is bigger than our current circumstances. We thank God that He is in control.
And every time you win the battle, you become stronger! Isn’t that great? You don’t start out strong. You often start out weak, falling repeatedly into despair. But you can rise and fight in the power of His might. Hebrews 11:34 tells us about the men and women of faith who “out of weakness were made strong, waxed valiant in fight.”
You are in a battle, dear wife, and mother. The enemy of our souls hates marriage and hates family life and comes subtly to undermine and weaken our marriages and homes. Therefore, we must be strong for the fight. We must stand against all temptations and deceptions of the enemy.
However, God calls us strong and courageous. Proverbs 31:10 says: “Who can find a virtuous woman, for her price is far above rubies.” The word “virtuous” is the Hebrew word chayil and means “might, strength, power, and valor.” It is used in the context of war and battle and is the same word used to describe men of valor in the Old Testament. We do not fight with physical strength or flesh and blood, but with principles and powers and the deceptions and delusions of this world. Be strong in the Lord and the power of His might as you fight against them.
2. STRONG IN FAITH
“Without faith is impossible to please God” (Hebrews 11:6). Without faith, it is impossible to truly function as wife and mother. Life is not perfect. Not everything goes the way we plan it. We need faith for conception, pregnancy, birthing, and day to day mothering. We each face impossible situations that are beyond our control.
The Bible women who lived long ago learned how to trust God. 1 Peter 3:5 says: “For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who TRUSTED IN GOD, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands.” What about when their husbands disobeyed God? What about when they made the wrong decisions? Their trust was in a greater One than their husbands. Therefore, they submitted to their husbands and TRUSTED GOD. God does not fail us when we put our trust in Him.
There is a powerful phrase that occurs twice in the Bible . . . “Because of Sarah.” Genesis 12:17 tells us that God “plagued Pharaoh and his house with GREAT PLAGUES because of Sarai Abraham’s wife.” And Genesis 18:20 tells us that God closed all the wombs of the house of King Abimelech “because of Sarah, Abraham’s wife.” That’s heavy stuff. God deals severely with kings of nations to protect one woman who trusts in Him!
More to come – ten points in all.
Blessings from Nancy Campbell
“Thank you, dear Father, that You have created me to be a strong helper to my husband. Please help me to be a godly encouragement to him—always lifting him up rather than pulling him down. I ask this in Jesus’ name, Amen.”
I want to be a woman who trusts God, no matter what my situation.