MY HUSBAND’S HELPER
Part 5 (The Strengths I Bring to my Marriage and Family)
“The tongue of the wise commends knowledge,
but the mouths of fools pour out folly. ”
Are you your husband’s helper?
6. STRONG TO SUBMIT
Isn’t amazing how many modern wives do not like this word? And yet it is a biblical word. A beautiful word.
1 Peter 3:15 (BECK) states: “This is how long ago the holy women who trusted in God used to make themselves beautiful: they submitted to their husbands, like Sarah who obeyed Abraham and call him lord.”
The New Century Version says: “In this same way the holy women who lived long ago and followed God, made themselves beautiful, yielding to their own husbands.”
This is how the women in those days adorned themselves. They submitted to and reverenced their husbands. A little different to today’s wives.
Under the Blessing
We should check out what this word means, shouldn’t we? The Greek word is hupotasso.
Hupo means “under” and tasso means “to arrange in an orderly manner, to assign to a certain position.”
God intends the wife to come under her husband’s covering. She comes under his headship to be protected by him, provided for by him, and to be led by him. Why do we resist this beautiful plan of God? Usually because of independence, rebellion, or wanting our own way. It never works for our blessing, our husband’s blessing, or the blessing of our children.
I love reading other Scriptures where the word hupo is used, e.g.
When Jesus looked out of Jerusalem, he cried: “How often would I have gathered thy children together, even as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, and ye would not” (Matthew 23:37). Isn’t a beautiful thing to be protected under our husbands? And yet there is always a resistance to God’s way. The flesh wars against the spirit. Even the people of Jerusalem didn’t want God’s protection. They wanted their own way.
Jesus talked about the little mustard seed that grows up to be a big tree “so that the fowls of the air may lodge under the shadow of it” (Mark 4:32). Another picture of protection.
1 Corinthians 10:1, 2 tells us how God protected the Israelites in the wilderness “under the cloud.” God gave them a cloud by the day to protect them from the heat and a cloud (a pillar of fire) by night to keep them warm. Another revelation of being under the blessing of God.
It’s not always easy to submit. We must give up our own way and say No to the flesh. That’s why we must be strong. It’s three-year-old behavior to demand our own way. It takes maturity to submit.
7. STRONG TO SATISFY
The very first thing God reveals about marriage is that we will be “one flesh.” Genesis 2:24 says: “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” It is impossible for the man to be “one flesh” without his wife. Therefore, this is the most important way we “help” our husbands. Our bodies were designed for this oneness. It is an essential part of our marriage or we don’t have a marriage!
Sometimes we must remind ourselves of 1 Corinthians 7:3-5: “The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife. Do not deprive each other of sexual relations.”
Proverbs 5:19 gives a further description of the wife’s role: “Let her (his wife) be as the loving hind and pleasant roe: let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.” The CEB translates: “Let her breasts intoxicate you all the time; always be drunk on her love.”
God gives the wife to the husband for this purpose (and many others too). We are a divine helper to our husbands in so many ways. We must take notice of a few important points in this Scripture.
a) Satisfy. We are to satisfy the God-given needs of our husbands. The word for “let her breasts satisfy thee” is ravah and means “to slake the thirst, make drunk, satiate.” Got the message?
b) At all times. Do you notice that our breasts are to satiate always? “At all times” doesn’t mean sometimes. “At all times” means at times when we may not feel like it.
c) Ravish. We do not give grudgingly to our husbands, but think how we can ravish them. The word “ravish” is interesting. The Hebrew is shagah and means “to go astray, to err.” However, in the context of marriage, it does not mean to err in sin, but to err in loving. Other translations say the husband is to be “enraptured,” “captivated,” exhilarated,” “be drunk,” and “transported with delight” with his wife’s love. This is how we are to minister to our husbands. Don’t settle for the boring, but willingly enrapture your husband.
d) Always. Once again, the Bible emphasizes the word “always.” Not sometimes, when we feel like it, or when we have the urge, but ALWAYS ready. Not only to be ready, but to initiate.
What does “always” mean? The word is tamiyd and means “continually, constant, regular, perpetual.” This same word is used of the “continual” burnt offerings. It is translated “daily,” speaking of the daily sacrifices which happened every morning and every evening. It’s the same word that says: “So shall I keep thy law continually” (Psalm 119:44). It’s the same word in Psalm 34:1: “His praise shall continually be in my mouth.” Now, I am not saying you can always keep up with the daily, but at least you get the message that it is to be regular.
The wonderful thing is that as you seek to minister to your husband as his divine helper, to satisfy and satiate his needs, you will be satiated too. And remember one other thing. The devil hates every beautiful gift from God. Therefore, he hates the intimacy of marriage and seeks to pervert it or stop us from enjoying it. Don’t let the devil have his way. Let God have His way.
Blessings from Nancy Campbell
Dear Father, I thank you so much for your beautiful plan for our marriage. I thank you for making me a special and suitable helper for my husband. He cannot do without me. Help me to be all that You want me to be to him. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”
As I lay down my life, I find life.
As I satisfy my husband, I am satisfied.
As I yield to him, I am filled with joy and peace.