LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell

EPISODE 388: FOLLOWING JESUS, Part 2

How do we follow Jesus? We begin an acrostic of the word FOLLOW to see from the Scriptures how Jesus wants us to follow Him. In this podcast, we talk about Faithfully, Fervently, Obediently, Leaving everything behind, and Laying down our lives.

Announcer: Welcome to the podcast, Life to the Full, with Nancy Campbell, founder and publisher of Above Rubies, a magazine bringing strength and encouragement to families across the world.

Nancy Campbell: Hello, ladies! We’re together again, and we are talking about following Jesus. Today I’m starting the acrostic. “F.” So, we follow FAITHFULLY and FERVENTLY.

The next letter is “O.” OBEDIENTLY

We see this when Jesus called His disciples. In Matthew 4:18-20, we read of Jesus walking by the Sea of Galilee. He sees Peter and Andrew, and He says to them: “Follow Me, and I will make you fishers of men. And they straightway left their nets and followed Him.” I’m always amazed at that, that just one word from Jesus, and up they got and left.

He continued walking along the Sea of Galilee, and He sees James and John, the sons of Zebedee. In Matthew 4:21-22, it says” “And Jesus called them, and they immediately left the ship and their father, and followed Him.” Followed Jesus. So, we see the example of immediate obedience to what Jesus said.

I think that’s something that we should learn too, that immediate obedience to the word of the Lord. And also, to teach our children. I believe it is important to teach our children instant obedience, well, within a reasonable moment. I always used to say to my children, “Delayed obedience is disobedience.” You can tell your children to do something, but they want to do a thousand things before they get to do that.

But no, we have to train them. It is training, because they’re not going to do this naturally. Everyone is born with this selfish thing within them. They want to do their own thing. So, even when they’re told to do something, they want to do their own thing first. But no, we have to train our children how to obey when we speak.

Actually, I’ve shared with you about this before. But we start when our children are very little. When we tell them to do something, even a little thing, when they’re just maybe a toddler, we always have to make sure that they understand what we’ve said. You can never expect obedience unless you know your child has heard. Hearing, learning to hear, actually comes before obedience. You’ve got to have an ear that is alert to hear. And a true hearing ear is an obedient ear. It hears and it obeys.

So, you’ll tell your little toddler to do something, and then you’ll say, “What did Mommy say?” And you get them to repeat it. OK, they know. “OK, do it right now.” And you’ll lead them to do it, so they know that when you speak, they obey. These little ones, you train them like this, and you keep training them. Because training means doing it over and over and over again, and there will be times when you will have to discipline for outright disobedience.

Now you must always be careful. As I said, you must know that your child heard, because even for older children, you can call out some command from the kitchen and think they heard, but really, they may not have heard. They can be in some dream and they really didn’t hear at all. You can’t discipline someone for something they did not hear.

You must always know your child heard perfectly and understood. Then you can expect obedience, encouraging and training them into obeying immediately. If there is outright willful disobedience, then there will need to be discipline, because as parents, we are training our children on God’s behalf. We have to do it according to what God wants.

Just read through Proverbs. I think as a parent, we need to read through Proverbs continually . . . in fact, you can read a chapter every day. There are 31 chapters in Proverbs and 31 days in the month. OK, whatever’s the date today, you can read that chapter of Proverbs. You will find lots of good advice there, coming from the Bible. It’s actually not coming from our humanist stuff that we get today. There is so much humanistic parenting today that is opposite to the Bible. We’ve got to get back to what the Bible says.

So, encourage your children in this, dear mothers. I know, often it’s just easier to let things go, but no, we’ve got to keep up with that training, because we are preparing our children to hear the voice of the Lord. If they have dull ears and they don’t listen to us and they don’t obey, they are not going to be ready to be called by Jesus.

I’m sure that as a godly mother, you want and you pray that your children will be called by the Lord. He will call them to do the things that He has planned for them to fulfill their destiny. But children will not hear who haven’t learned to hear and obey as children . . . so that they will be ready to hear the voice of the Lord. Amen?

All right. The next one is “L.” I have two things here for the letter “L,” “Leaving everything behind,” and “Laying down our lives.” The first one . . .

LEAVING EVERYTHING BEHIND

We see three things here. Firstly, these young men, and they were young. The disciples were not older men. Did you know that? It’s amazing, isn’t it, how we are impacted by pictures. All my life, I saw pictures of the disciples with their big beards. They looked to be about 30 or 40.

But no, it was only a few years ago that I suddenly realized as I was reading the Word (I have a whole article on this). If you really want to hear my thoughts from the Word, you can email me about it. But the disciples were actually young teenagers. They were very young. You see, back in Bible days, they fulfilled their education really quite early. By 13 or so, most young men had completed their education. Many of them would have understood so much of the Torah. Some could maybe even say it by heart. They had a very good education.

Then, when they got to about 13 or so and they’d fulfilled their education, they would do one of two things. One, they would go into their father’s business and work with him and help build up and strengthen the family business. Or they may go with a rabbi. There were a lot of rabbis in the time of Jesus.

 

1) PREPARED TO LEAVE EVERYTHING BEHIND

Jesus Himself was a rabbi. You could not be a rabbi until you were 30 years of age. Then you gathered young men around you to teach them in whatever you wanted to teach them. That’s what Jesus did. When He was 30, then He began His ministry, so He began to find these young teens to gather around Him. He found twelve who He began to teach and prepare to change the world. They were just young men. But it’s amazing how they were prepared to leave everything behind. Let’s notice these Scriptures, shall we? Matthew 4:20 is talking about Peter and Andrew. It says that when Jesus called them: “They straightway left  (notice the word) “left their nets.”

Also, talking about James and John in Mark 1:20: “They left their father Zebedee, and the ship with the hired servants, and went after Jesus.” Wow. This poor father. They forgot him. They left their father. They left their business. They left their career, and they followed Jesus.

Luke 5:11: “They forsook all and followed Him.”

2)  PREPARED TO LEAVE AND CHANGE THEIR CAREER

Secondly, they were prepared to change their careers, because they were fishermen. But what did Jesus say to them? Mark 1:17: “Come ye after Me.” I love that! “Come ye after Me, and I will make you fishers of men.” So, they actually left their careers, left everything they knew behind to follow Jesus.

Of course, that should be our attitude in our following of Jesus, that we’re prepared to leave all the old things of the world, and all the things of the present world that tempt us. What does it say in 2 Corinthians 5:17? “If any man be in Christ, he is a new creation. Old things have passed away. Behold, all things are become new.”

We enter into a new life. So, even as we are living our life with Jesus, it’s a new life. We’re showing our children that we don’t live the life like everybody else does around, who don’t know Jesus. We live a different life. We are new people.

MARRIAGE IS ALSO A LEAVING

‘But also, it comes back . . .  I think this whole principle of leaving, leaving, that’s what they did. They left everything. This comes to marriage too, doesn’t it? Do you remember, in Genesis 2:24? The first words God spoke, of course, the first words God spoke to man when He created him were: “Be fruitful, multiply, and fill the earth.”

But then, we go to the account in Genesis 2 where He created the woman out of the man. Then He brings the woman to the man, and He says: “Therefore shall a leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”

So, right at the very beginning, when God is bringing the man and wife together, the first marriage, the first thing He says is “Leave.” Yes, that is the first thing about marriage, dear ones. We leave. When we get married, when you got married, when I got married, we left our parents’ home, and we left the lifestyle we had before. We leave our single lifestyle. We leave it behind, and we follow. As a woman, we follow after our husband.

Here it’s talking to the man, too. It says: “Therefore shall a man leave and cleave.” So, a man is also to leave his father’s house. Well, he may. Back then, he may still be in his father’s business. But there would be a leaving of that reliance on his parents. Now he is beginning a new family. And he is now the head of a new family. He’s establishing something new.

For the wife, we see the principle in the Word of . . . actually the woman will leave her home to go with her husband. We see that in the story of Isaac and Rebekah. Remember, Abraham sent his servant to find a wife for Isaac. He got to this place and God miraculously led him to the right place. He found Rebekah and told them this is why he’s here. He wants to take a bride for Isaac. It’s amazing here.

We see in verse 58: “And they called Rebekah and said unto her, will you go with this man?” Imagine it, dear ladies. Here she was, she’s a young teen. She was only young. And they say to her, “Will you go with this man?” She hasn’t even seen the man! She doesn’t even know what he’s like! And even in another country! He’s miles and miles away. She’ll never see her family again, maybe. She doesn’t know.

Would some teen today say they will go? But she says: “I will go.”

Verse 61: “And Rebekah arose, and her damsels, and they rode upon the camels and followed the man” to somewhere she didn’t know, to a man she didn’t even know? But she was willing to go.

We think of Sarah who followed her husband. God told Abraham: “I want you to leave your home, and kindred, and country, and go out to a place that I will show you.” He didn’t even tell him where it was! He had to go by faith. And Sarah also had to leave. She was willing to go with him, not even knowing where she was going. Even Leah and Rachel, who were married from their own home and lived there for many years, but eventually they had to leave too, and follow Jacob where God wanted him to be.

I remember myself . . .  way back when I began our marriage. We’ve now been married 62 amazing years. But when we got married, I actually did leave. I did come back to my home for a few months when my husband was in the Philippine Islands. I had to stay back at that time. I lived with my parents for a few months until our son was born. Then a few months later, I joined my husband in the Philippine Islands.

But apart from that time, apart from visiting our family, which was always the greatest joys of our lives to go back to my home and visit my parents, I never lived in that little town I grew up in ever in my life. We lived in the Philippine Islands. When we eventually came back to New Zealand, we lived in a different city. Then we moved to Australia. Then we moved to America. I actually, literally, left.

Although, of course, as a woman, you don’t leave (figuratively) your parents. You always love them and honor them. Of course, our visits to them were always so glorious, and their visits to us. But I did have to leave (physically), because that was biblical, and that was what was expected, especially in that day.

I’m amazed today, how that many times, many women don’t follow their husband. The poor husband has to follow the wife because she’s got this good job, and she’s not prepared to leave it. But that’s not biblical.

The story of the servant going to get a bride for Isaac is a story, and it’s true. But it’s also a type Every single thing in the Word of God is a type. It’s a prototype for us to learn from. We go to Romans. Let me give you a Scripture about that. OK, I’ll have to put it in the transcript. It tells us that every single thing that was written was written for our learning, on whom the end of the world has come. (* See below). So, we have to take note. This whole story of getting a bride for Isaac was the type of the wife leaving her home and going with her husband.

But, of course, dear lovely ladies, some of you may have left a career. Or maybe you did keep on with your career for some time and then God showed you that He had given you a much bigger career. You’ve come home from the corporate world, and you're now home with your children, because you know this is where God wants you. This is true, ladies.

When I left, married my husband and left, I left a high school teaching career. I was teaching high school at the time. I loved it, but I left it completely. Never, ever, ever went back to it at all. Maybe some of you have experienced that also. But I want you to know that you're coming into a whole new thing. You’re coming into a greater career, far greater than you ever had before, no matter what you think.

“Oh goodness me! This was a great career, and I was earning good money.” Your career as a mother is more powerful than anything you had before. It is the most powerful career in the world. To embrace children and raise godly sons and daughters who will impact the nation. To build a strong marriage. To build a strong home. It’s the godly homes that bless the nation.

You are doing something so powerful. Of course, society tends to make light of it. But the Bible makes big of it. And God makes big of it. In Ezekiel 19, there is an allegory there, where God likens motherhood to Judah. It tells us there that He exalts her. He exalts her. She is exalted above all the other trees round about. This is how God sees motherhood, as an exalted career.

I think of that Scripture in Proverbs 11:11: “By the blessing of the upright, the city is exalted. But it is overthrown by the mouth of the wicked.” The message of this Scripture is that the kind of families that live in a city are what the city will be like. Then ultimately, of course, the nation. So, the more upright, godly, trustworthy, and Bible-believing families that live in a city, the godlier that city will be.

This is what you are doing. You are home in this greatest career that God has given to women, to bring forth godly children, to raise them to be godly, to raise them in His ways so they will impact the city where you live, and eventually the nation, and maybe other nations as well.

It is powerful this word “upright.” Let’s see what it means. In the Hebrew, the word means “straight, righteous, doing that which is right in the eyes of the Lord.” We get these phrases, these modern phrases, I don’t know whether you use them. I’ve used them often in life. But they come from this word “upright,” which means “to be straight.”

STANDING STRAIGHT AND TALL

Have you ever heard the phrase “straight and narrow”? “You’re on the straight and narrow road.”

“Standing straight and tall.”

Or “Straighten up!” I often said that to my children. Maybe they’re not doing what is right. You say, “Come on! Straighten up!”

Or it’s “straight shooter.” That’s someone who always tells the truth.

Both the man and woman have to leave and to cleave. I remember listening to Charlie Kirk. I do love listening to him. Do you enjoy it? He had so many good things to say. He promoted family. It was so amazing to see a young man not only speaking out so boldly and loudly and clearly for family and for having children. Not just to the church but to the whole of the secular world. Out there in the colleges, which are the most hostile places where he could ever speak such a word.

“Get married young and have more children than you can afford!” It seems a very reckless statement, but no, it is not a reckless statement at all, because it is God’s Word. God said: “Get married, be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth!” You say, “How can we afford to do that?”

Well, I know many of you know how God has provided for you. He miraculously provides and that is His promise in Deuteronomy 28, the blessing chapter. “I will bless the fruit of your womb.” And then He says: “I will bless your cattle, and your sheep, and your store, and your provision.” Those blessings come after the blessing of the womb.

But I love what he says to the men. Did you ever hear it? He likens getting married to the man as actually a funeral. He says . . .

“You are saying good-bye to your previous self. The woman is the icon, the symbol of beauty, almost always in white. The man, usually in black and white, like he’s attending someone’s death, because at his wedding, it is a death.

It’s the death of the bachelor mindset.

It’s the death of promiscuity.

It’s the death of the wandering eye.

It’s the death of immoral behavior. It’s the death of texting girls casually.

It’s the death of ‘I get to do what I want to do.’

It’s the death of going to the bar with friends.

It’s the death of acting like an infant.

It's the death of playing video games until 1 AM in the morning.

And it’s the birth of a man.”

And it is similar for the woman too. We leave behind, because we’re coming into something so new and even greater.

3) JESUS CALLED THOSE WHO WERE HARD WORKERS

Now the third thing I noticed in leaving behind is that Jesus called young men who were industrious and hard-working. In Matthew 4:18-19, when He called Peter and Andrew, what were they doing? Do you remember? They were “casting a net into the sea, for they were fishermen.” They were already doing something. They were busy with their career.

When He was speaking to James and John, and calling them, what were they doing? They were “mending their nets; and He called them” (Matthew 4:21). They were industrious. They were already doing something. They weren’t just basking on the shore of Galilee, just lying there sunbathing. No, they were working.

Jesus didn’t call loafers. He called workers and He said to those workers: “Follow Me.” Jesus didn’t want lazy people. So, therefore, ladies, in our preparing of our children to be called by Jesus, we’ve got to train them how to be industrious, how to be hard workers, how to love work. It seems that children often don’t want to work. They would rather not be bothered. But must train them to work.

Once again, they will see it by our lifestyle, by watching us. They see our attitude to work. What about your attitude, lovely mothers? Do you sometimes sigh and groan and complain of all you have to do? Your children see the complaining spirit. “Oh, I’ve got all this laundry to do! Oh, look at all these dishes! Oh, oh!” They see a complaining spirit. Well, if you have a complaining spirit, of course you’ll have complaining children.

But if you have a positive attitude, “Come on, children, let’s get stuck in! Isn’t it great to work? We can get this job done!” You have a positive attitude about work, and you love work, because work is wonderful. Work is therapeutic. God gave work before the fall of man.

I have to tell you a secret. When I was a child, I had this understanding; I thought that work came into the world after sin came into the world. But that’s not true! No, work came into the world before sin came into the world. Work is something that God gives us for our blessing. It’s very therapeutic and it’s very good for us.

We need to train our children in how to be good workers, how to have a good attitude about work, and about the chores that you give them. That’s training too. Not just training them to do those chores. It’s training them to have that great attitude about doing it. They do it with joy. They do it with gusto. “And I take so long to do it, and it’s such a painful process.” No! They know how to get stuck in and do it! We have to train them to do that. And, of course, they’ve got to see it in our lifestyle because we’re saying to our children, “Children, follow me. Just imitate me, and you’ll know what to do.”

I was reading in Proverbs, and I noticed there are so many Scriptures about work in Proverbs. Here are just two or three for you. This is from the Passion Translation, and I wrote it down, because it’s in rhyme. I love things that are in rhyme.

 Proverbs 14:23:

“If you work hard at what you do,

Great abundance will come to you.”

Now, that’s easy to teach your children, isn’t it? Because when something’s in rhyme, they will pick it up. So, that’s a good Scripture put to rhyme that you can teach your children. “If you work hard at what you do, great abundance will come to you.” 

I can think of a great little tune for that. You could think of that too. Make it into a song, a song that you can sing when you're doing work around the house and when your children are doing their chores. You could make a great tune for that little rhyme so they can sing it as they work.

In the New Living Translation, that Scripture says: “Work brings profit, but mere talk leads to poverty.”

Proverbs 12:24: “Work hard and become a leader. Be lazy and become a slave.”

That’s an important principle to teach your children too, because, as I said before, this is the point. Jesus did not call loafers. Jesus called young men who were actually doing something, who were industrious when He called them. Jesus still looks for industrious people to call into His kingdom and to do His work.

And also, even in the secular world, as our children grow up, especially our young men, they’ve got to be providers of the home. They’re going to make their way in life. They’re going to be successful if they have a good attitude about work. They will always go the extra mile.

LEADERS GIVE THE MAXIMUM * LOAFERS GIVE THE MINIMUM

When they go to work, they arrive early. When they end work, they don’t look, oh, they’re watching the clock. Wow! Whatever the time is, they’re meant to finish maybe at five. “Oh! Right! I’m gone!” No, they’ll stay five minutes, ten minutes longer, sorting out things. They’re prepared to give it everything. They don’t just give it a mere, “OK, this is the minimum.” They give the maximum! That person will rise, and they will rise to the top. But they’ve got to start when they’re young.

But I see our time is going. Just another little thought. Back to that story of the servant of Abraham, going to get a bride for Isaac. There’s a Scripture there. It’s in Genesis 24:27, and I love it. It’s the servant speaking, and he says: “I being in the way, the LORD led me . . .” When he started off, he didn’t actually know where he was going. But God led him.

He didn’t sit and wait, and think, “OK, God, I’ll sit here with my camels, and when you tell me where I’m going, we’ll all start.” No, he began. He began to take his journey along the road. As he began his journey, God led him.

This is how God works. He doesn’t pick up people who are just sitting on the sofa doing nothing. He picks up people who are moving already, who are finding something to do. “Yes, I see a need there. I will do it.” And so, they’re moving. They’re working. And God will begin to lead them and guide them, little by little, into all that He has for them. That is a principle. It doesn’t ever start by sitting on the sofa waiting. It starts as we get moving. Amen?

All right. Let’s pray, and we’ll carry on next week with more of our acrostic.

“Dear Father, thank You again for the way You teach us by Your Holy Spirit. We thank You for Your precious Word. Every single word teaches us another principle of Your ways. We thank You, Lord God. We ask that You will continue to teach us, to lead us, to guide us. And once again, we ask that, Father, You will help us to be true godly examples to our family, that they will see You in us. That they will see, Lord, how to live for You as they watch our lives. We ask it in the Name of Jesus. Amen.”

Scripture references:

• Romans 15:4: “For whatsoever things were written aforetime were written for our learning, that we through patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope.”
• 1 Corinthians 10:6: “Now these things were our examples, to the intent we should not lust after evil things, as they also lusted.”
• 1 Corinthians 10:11: “Now all these things happened unto them for examples: and they are written for our admonition, upon whom the ends of the world are come.”

Blessings from Nancy Campbell

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www.aboverubies.org

Transcribed by Darlene Norris

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DON’T FORGET TO TELL OTHERS ABOUT THESE PODCASTS AND TRANSCRIPTS.

“LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell, Above Rubies”

DON’T KEEP THE BLESSINGS TO YOURSELF.

IT IS ENCOURAGING FOR ALL WIVES AND MOTHERS.

 

MY HEART IS FULL

I am sure you love the song introducing this podcast. Well, it’s not a new song. Serene and Pearl wrote it and recorded it many years ago, but the words are still so anointed for every mother in her home.

You can download the full song from www.aboverbies.org from the Book and music store. Go to: Above Rubies Bookstore

The following is the link for the single:

MY HEART IS FULL - Music Single from Peace All Over Me - Downloadable MP3 Format Album

Here are all the words for you:

MY HEART IS FULL

Little arms reaching for me,

Grubby fingers touch my face

And love is what I feel.

Little eyes looking at me,

Chubby cheeks burst with smiles

And joy is what I know,

Peeking in while they sleep at night,

I thank God for the gift of life,

I thank God for more that I deserve.

CHORUS.

My heart is full, my heart is full,

Why would I want for more?

When my cup overflows?

My heart is full, my heart is full,

This much I know.

Strong arms reaching for me

Circle my waist for the millionth time

And love is what I feel

Sometimes I watch him sleep at night,

I thank God that I am his wife,

And joy is what I know.

CHORUS.

Sometimes when discontent creeps into my soul

A still small voice reminds me of the ones my arms can hold.

 

 

LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell

EPISODE 387: FOLLOWING JESUS, Part 1

We begin a new series, FOLLOWING JESUS. Paul beseeched the new believers: “Be ye followers of me.” Can we say to our children, “Look at me, children. Watch my lifestyle and you'll know how to walk with Jesus”?

Announcer: Welcome to the podcast, Life to the Full, with Nancy Campbell, founder and publisher of Above Rubies, a magazine bringing strength and encouragement to families across the world.

Nancy Campbell: Hello, wonderful wives and mothers! I am speaking to the most amazing and important people in the whole of the world. For, dear mothers, I hope you realize you are the ones who keep this world going!

The only reason we have all these things happening in the world is because we bring children into the world. It’s only because we bring forth children that we have to build more homes, and build more buildings, and cities, and more inventions. Everything to keep the world going.

Now, if mothers disappear, there will be no more children. Then, gradually, there will be no more need for anything in the world. So, you are the most important people. You have the power to determine the destiny of your nation. It is the mothers who determine the destiny of the nation. Because what is a nation? It is the families of the nation.

The continuation of the nation is the children we bring into the world to grow up to be the next generation. How we train this next generation is what will impact the nation. As we have more godly marriages and godly families and raise godly sons and daughters, that will make a godly nation.

That’s why the enemy comes to attack marriage, and attack the family, because he is trying to destroy, ultimately, the nation. He wants to destroy everything that God has planned. But if we have Christ living within us, what does the Bible say in 1 John 3:8 that Jesus Christ came into the world to destroy the works of the devil. So, if Christ is living within us, we also should rise up to destroy the works of the devil.

One of the most amazing ways we do this is bringing forth children into the world. We are life-givers. Oh, the devil hates life-givers. He hates life. He tries to stop life. But we are bringing life into the world. We are raising these children to be godly children for our nation. So, be encouraged today, dear wonderful mothers. I bless you and encourage you.

This coming week, Thursday, is Thanksgiving. I pray you’ll have a wonderful Thanksgiving with all your family.

And also, have you received your new magazine? Above Rubies #103. I’m sure, if you’ve received it, you will be loving it. It’s such a beautiful issue of Above Rubies. I know you’ll want to share it with so many. If you need more copies, don’t hesitate to call in or email, and we can send you more.

Sadly, if you get 20 or more copies (because we have a lot of people who get bulk orders because they have a vision to take the message out and share it with everyone they meet, and put it in waiting rooms, and get this message out into the nation), well, sorry, lovely ladies, we haven’t sent out those packages yet, but we’re praying that we’ll be able to do it this next week.

The reason is that this time, the shipping and the postage went up so high. I couldn’t believe it. I forked out already $61,000 just to send out what we have already sent out! Now we’re praying for the money to come in for the bigger orders to send out. And also, now, to pay for the magazine. I spent all the money on shipping!

So, if the Lord touches your heart, and you want to be part of this great vision of encouraging the families of this nation and the world, do send in a donation. We’ve got to keep getting this message out. Amen?

Oh, another question I have for you. A few podcasts ago, I told you how we had started praying the Lord’s Prayer every day. Did you know that the early church prayed the Lord’s Prayer three times a day? Well, we actually now pray it two times a day, because we pray the Lord’s Prayer at the end of our morning devotions and at the end of our evening devotions. Of course, when we have prayer meetings, we always end it with the Lord’s Prayer too.

This has been a new thing for us in the last few months. But I want to tell you what a blessing it has been and is. When we pray this prayer passionately, meaning every word, crying out to God for every word, it is so powerful in our own lives, and I know in what will happen because there is no greater prayer that we can pray. Jesus gave us these words to pray, and they are so powerful.

I would encourage you as a family to begin to do this too. As you gather your family today, to read the Word and pray together, end with saying it or singing it. We love to sing it best but either is fine. Sing out or speak out these words. I believe if God’s people were doing this all over the nation, and every day, wow! What amazing answers to prayer we will see!

So, would you like to do that? I just wanted to remind you about it again today, because we are feeling the power of it in our own lives knowing that every time we pray this prayer, God is hearing. He will work, and He will bring heaven to earth, because that’s what this prayer is about! That what is in heaven will come to earth. It is so powerful.

All right, ladies. What have I got for you today? When I’m reading the Word, I’m constantly arrested by things that the Word is saying to me, or what Jesus is saying. Recently, I was reading about being followers of the Lord. I felt I needed to study it a little more as I always like to do. Anything I’m reading, I say, “Oh, I’ve got to know more about that!” I’ve got to read and find every Scripture about that. So, I’m going to share what I’ve been learning about following Jesus.

First of all, I’m always challenged by the words of Paul when he said in 1 Corinthians 4:15-16: “For though ye have ten thousand instructors in Christ yet have ye not many fathers: for in Christ Jesus I have begotten you through the gospel. Wherefore I beseech you, be ye followers of me.” That’s pretty powerful. He didn’t say, “Be followers of Jesus.” He said, “Be followers of me” because he was writing to new believers.

Often, new believers need to see the life of Jesus. They can read the Bible, but they’re still learning to hear from the Lord. They need to see the light of Jesus exemplified in someone. The life of Jesus was exemplified in Paul, and he could say, “Dear ones, just look at my lifestyle and follow me.”

Again, in 1 Corinthians 11:1, he says it again: “Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ.” The word there, to be a follower of Paul, who is a follower of Christ, of course, is a word that means, “to be an imitator.” “Just look at me and imitate what I do.”

Then we go to Philippians 3:17 where Paul was writing to the new believers: “Brethren, be followers together of me, and mark them which walk so as ye have us for an example.”

There’s a wonderful Scripture in Romans 1:12. Paul is writing again and he says: “That I may be comforted together with you by the mutual faith both of you and me.”

We see a lot of togethering in that one Scripture. He says: “together with you, by the mutual faith, both of you and me.” That “mutual faith,” that word in the Greek is allelon. It’s the same word that is translated when it talks about doing things for one another, like “pray for one another,” “bless one another,” “do good to one another,” and so on.

I found well over 30 “one another’s” when I was discovering them in the New Testament. So, it’s one anothering, our mutual faith. As we do life together, and encourage one another (that’s another one, “encourage one another,”) all these things we can’t do on our own. You see, our Christian life is not meant to be lived as an isolated life. It is meant to be lived as a togethering life.

Well, first of all, we are togethering in a family, aren’t we? That’s the first togethering. Then, togethering in the body of believers where we fellowship. That’s why it’s so important that, as a family, you belong to a fellowship of believers, whether it’s a great big church, or a little, small home church. But you must be part of a gathering.

That’s God’s heart, as He says in Hebrews 10:25: “Neglect not the assembling of yourselves together, as the manner of some is; but . . . so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.” Remember what it says? “Neglect not the assembling of yourselves.” That’s getting together with others. You can’t do that, just staying home isolated on your own.

So, he’s saying: “Be ye followers together of me.” I do believe that this is very pertinent to us as parents, because God gives children to parents so that we, as parents, can lead our children. First of all, we lead them to Jesus. We lead them to a saving faith in Jesus. And that is so important.

I think we should always be on the lookout, being aware, dear mothers, of when our children are ready to come to know Jesus personally. I do believe that, in a godly home, where the Word of God is being read every day, that little children can come to know Jesus at a very early age.

All of our children came to know Jesus at the age of four, except our oldest son. He was a little older. But the others were only four years of age. And yet, today, although some of them are in their 60’s, that moment when they received Christ is still real to them today. They have continued to walk this way all their lives.

Why can a little one be ready? Children are born with . . . God has put within them a spirit to know Him, to want to know Him. Little children want to know about Jesus. The Word also makes the way for them because we are born again through the Word of God (1 Peter 1:23).

What did Paul know? Paul was writing to Timothy in 2 Timothy 3:15: “From a child thou hast known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise unto salvation.” That word “child” . . . do you know what that word is, mothers? It’s the Greek word, brephos. B-R-E-P-H-O-S. It literally means “a little babe.” In fact, it’s used when the angel spoke to Mary and said she would have a babe in her womb. That’s brephos.

Then, when Jesus was born and the angel came to the shepherds, he said to them: “You will find the babe lying in a manger.” The word is brephos. It’s the same for a newborn babe. Of course, it can mean a little toddler too, and a young child.

So, from a very early age, in fact, in the womb, because when you are having devotions every day and your husband is reading the Word, and you're sitting beside him . . . you’re pregnant, and in those latter months of pregnancy, your little baby can hear. Your baby can hear your husband’s voice.

When your little baby is born, and you're nursing your baby as your husband is reading the Word, the little baby is hearing the Word.

That Word is supernatural. It’s powerful. It’s eternal. It’s going into them. And it’s, little by little, making the way ready for them for salvation. Even at the age of three or four, they can come to know Jesus. That’s the first thing. We lead them to Jesus through a saving knowledge of knowing that they have Jesus in their lives, because the devil is after our children, even from a little age. We want to get them having Christ in them and knowing Jesus.

I’m thinking of another Scripture right now. I’m going to turn to it. I hope I can find it. It talks about how our little ones have known the Father. They know the Father. 1 John 2:13, 14 it talks about how the young men know the Father, and also the older men, the fathers. But there is a Scripture here. I’m not finding it, but it’s here. I’ll put it in the transcript, the actual reference about how our little ones, our children, will know the Father (YES, IT’S 1 JOHN 2:13. See below). He wants them to know Him at a young age.

Then, of course, OK, here comes this challenge of what Paul could say: “Be ye imitators of me, even as I also am of Christ.” I believe that we, as parents, should be able to say this to our children. “Children, just look at me. Just watch my lifestyle. See what I’m doing. If you follow me, you will learn to follow the Lord.” Because we should be a picture of one who is “Christ in you, the hope of glory,” and we are walking in the footsteps of Jesus.

So, our children are watching us. They’re learning also how to walk in the footsteps of Jesus. As they get older, they’ll learn to find it in the Word themselves, but when they’re younger, they’re going to watch our lifestyle. They’re going to imitate us. It is very powerful, isn’t it?

Do you think you can say that to your children, dear mother? “Children, just watch me, and you’ll know how to walk with Jesus. You’ll know how to follow Him. You’ll know what to do.” We need to all pray that we’ll be able to do that. That means that we have got to follow Jesus closely. We’ve got to follow His Word.

There’s another Scripture, 2 Thessalonians 3:7-10. This is reading from the New King James version. I usually read the King James Version. Sometimes I’ll use another translation if it’s a little clearer. Now Paul wanted these young believers to follow the doctrine he was teaching. That was part of “Be ye followers of me.” “OK, listen to the doctrine I’m teaching you,” because doctrine is not just something we have in our heads.

In the Word of God, we read that we’re to live the doctrine. We are to adorn the doctrine. Doctrine is something that we not only learn, but we live. We live it out. A lot of the doctrine of the New Testament is not just something for your mind to think about. It’s what we are to do. It’s the practical things of life.

Here Paul says: “For you yourselves know how you ought to follow us.” He was writing to them, but he had Sylvanus and Timothy with him. So, he used “us” there, rather than “me,” because they were walking in the footsteps of Jesus.

“For we were not disorderly among you, nor did we eat anyone’s bread free of charge, but worked, with labor and toil night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you, not because we do not have authority, but to make ourselves an example of how you should follow us. For even when we were with you, we commanded you this.”

He didn’t just say, “Well, this is a good idea.” He commanded this word. “If anyone will not work, neither shall he eat.” So here, Paul is saying, “Yes, I want you to follow the doctrine I’m teaching you, but I want you to also follow my lifestyle.”

Now, OK, he’s writing to the Thessalonian believers here. He says: “Did you notice our lifestyle? What were we doing? We were working our soul cases out! We were working night and day, and we labored, and we toiled,” so that they could pay for everything that they were doing. They didn’t want to be a burden on the people.

Paul was an example of this. He said, “This is an example of what you're meant to be. You don’t loaf around. No, you work hard. And, by the way, if anyone doesn’t work, well, he shouldn’t even eat.” Of course, that’s a biblical premise. That’s one we do teach our children too.

Even in the practical things of life, when we’re showing our children, and telling them to imitate us in our walk with the Lord, yes, of course, they’ll be watching. Well, they’ll just see. Our lives are lived before them. They’re going to see, they’ll see! Is Jesus pre-eminent in our lives? Do we really love the Word of God? They see us loving it, living our lives by it. They see us gathering all of them together to have Bible reading and prayer because we believe it’s so important They get to see, wow, this is important.

I trust that, as we do here in our home, that you do also, that you put this first. This is No. 1 in your home. It’s so easy, isn’t it, to just let things take over, because, oh, we all have so much going on in our lives. We are all busy with all these things happening. Things can always be happening, so “Oh, well, we haven’t got time this morning to have our devotions. Oh, we’ve got to get on with this!” And then evening comes. “Oh, wow! We’ve got to go out.”

And, of course, maybe we’re out there on the sports field. Isn’t it amazing, ladies? Have you noticed that somehow, I don’t know, I think it’s a little trick of the devil. But all the sports things that we take our children to are usually always, you're out there, away from the home when it’s actually the time for the mother to be in the home preparing the evening meal, getting it ready, to gather the family around, so that at the end of the meal, we’re there. We’re together. We can have Bible reading together. We can pray together, and worship together.

Oh, but we don’t have time, because we’re out doing this. We’re out doing that. We’re not even home at all! We have to watch that we don’t let all these other things take over, because our children are imbibing. They’re imbibing our lifestyle. They see what is most important.

OK! Getting out to these sports is more important than spending time as a family with God? They get to see, by our lifestyle, what is the most important in our lives? Do we spend more time doing this, watching shows on TV, or social media, than we do spending time with the Lord, together with the Lord? What do they see? That’s what they’re going to follow.

In fact, today, so many families are not even eating together every mealtime, especially the evening meal which is a gathering time. What is the next generation going to do? They don’t see that’s important in your life. It’s not important. Well, OK, next generation. Wow, they’ll most probably hardly ever eat together like in so many homes today, they don’t even have stoves or anything. A lot of those young couples who are getting married today just eat out.

We’ve got to decide what is important in our lives, and what is biblical. What is biblical? And to know what’s biblical, we have got to know the doctrine of the Word. We’ve got to know what it says. Not just for the mental understanding, but for the practical working out, because the Bible is so practical.

You go to Psalm 128:3, and God is speaking about the family, and what picture does He give of the family? “Thy wife is like a fruitful vine in the heart of your home. And your children, look at all those children, sitting around the table like young olive shoots.” That’s the picture God reveals. The family sitting around the table! Yes, so practical! It’s in the Bible!

We haven’t even got time to do it. We think we know more than God. What we’re doing is more important than the Bible! So, let’s evaluate our lifestyle, the lifestyle we’re living before our family. They’ll imbibe it. Our children will imbibe those lifestyles. And I find that every generation somehow seems to degenerate. Oh goodness me! I think it’s time we started the regeneration of the generations.

I think of a funny story. When my husband was growing up, he was part of a family of nine children. They were a wonderful family. All his siblings walked with the Lord. Many of them are full-time in the work of God.

But as they were growing up, their father wouldn’t say to them, “Now, children” (if they were going out somewhere) “don’t you do anything I wouldn’t do!” Instead, he would say, “Now, don’t do anything I would do!” Of course, it was a joke, but they knew he was joking, and they knew what he really meant. But that’s what he used to say for fun. But, anyway, ladies, OK! We’re going to evaluate our lifestyle, because that’s the lifestyle our children will follow.

What happens next here? Oh yes, I wanted to show you this in Philippians. I just want to read this because Paul is saying, “Be imitators of me. Just watch what I’m doing.” And here we get a glimpse, I mean, we need to read through all of Paul’s epistles to really see what he’s saying, both mentally, for the mind to understand, but also the practical.

Here’s this passage. It’s such a beautiful understanding of Paul’s life. Philippians 3:7: “But what things were gain to me, those I counted loss for Christ. Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung” (that means cow poop)!

“That I may win Christ, and be found in him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith: that I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death; if by any means I might attain unto the resurrection of the dead . . . Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after.”

I love that. “I follow after.” As Paul was following after Christ, he was able to say to the new believers, “You just follow me, because I’m following after Christ. As you see me following after Him, you will know how to follow Him too.”

“I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus. Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before me, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” That gives us a little, little glimpse of Paul’s lifestyle.

So, lovely ladies, we have come to the end of this session, but we’re only just starting. I’ve got more to share with you, and I’m going to share with you an acrostic. So, as I began to study this, I thought, “OK, I will do an acrostic.” So, we start off with “F”, and then we will go to “O-L-L-O-W.” We will learn from each one of those letters, OK? So, tune in next week, and be blessed.

“Dear Father, we thank You, Lord, that You want us to follow after You with all our hearts. And, Lord, the greatest desire of our hearts is that our children will follow after You with all their hearts. Lord God, help them to see You in us. Help us, Lord God, to live our lifestyle according to Your Word, that we can truly say, “Children, just look at me. Look at Daddy. And you’ll know the way to go.” We ask this in Jesus’ Name. Amen.”

Blessings from Nancy Campbell

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www.aboverubies.org

Transcribed by Darlene Norris

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DON’T FORGET TO TELL OTHERS ABOUT THESE PODCASTS AND TRANSCRIPTS.

“LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell, Above Rubies”

DON’T KEEP THE BLESSINGS TO YOURSELF.

IT IS ENCOURAGING FOR ALL WIVES AND MOTHERS.

 

MY HEART IS FULL

I am sure you love the song introducing this podcast. Well, it’s not a new song. Serene and Pearl wrote it and recorded it many years ago, but the words are still so anointed for every mother in her home.

You can download the full song from www.aboverbies.org from the Book and music store. Go to: Above Rubies Bookstore

The following is the link for the single:

MY HEART IS FULL - Music Single from Peace All Over Me - Downloadable MP3 Format Album

Here are all the words for you:

MY HEART IS FULL

Little arms reaching for me,

Grubby fingers touch my face

And love is what I feel.

Little eyes looking at me,

Chubby cheeks burst with smiles

And joy is what I know,

Peeking in while they sleep at night,

I thank God for the gift of life,

I thank God for more that I deserve.

CHORUS.

My heart is full, my heart is full,

Why would I want for more?

When my cup overflows?

My heart is full, my heart is full,

This much I know.

Strong arms reaching for me

Circle my waist for the millionth time

And love is what I feel

Sometimes I watch him sleep at night,

I thank God that I am his wife,

And joy is what I know.

CHORUS.

Sometimes when discontent creeps into my soul

A still small voice reminds me of the ones my arms can hold.

DO YOUR LILTTLE  CHILDREN KNOW THEIR HEAVENLY FATHER?

The apostle John loved to call his readers his “little children.” The Greek word is teknion which means “a little child.” It is also used as a tender term for a teacher towards his disciples.” He calls them “little children” seven times in 1 John.

However, in 1 John 2:13, John changes the word. He wrote to the fathers because they knew God, the One who was from the beginning. He wrote to the young men because they had overcome the wicked one. But then I noticed with new alertness these words: “I write unto you, little children, because ye have known the Father.”

This time he uses a different word, paideion which means “a little boy or little girl, infant, a young child.” I was arrested by these words. God wants our little children to know Him. Sometimes we don’t expect our children to know the Father until they are older, but this Scripture shows that God wants our children to know Him when they are young.

He wants them to experience the Father’s love and protection from their earthly fathers so they will understand His love. He also wants them to come to know Him through the hearing of the Scriptures.

We see this in 2 Timothy 3:15: “From a child thou hast known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.” Here another different Greek word is used for child. This time it is brephos which speaks of “a babe in the womb, a babe that is newly born, a little child.” Check out Luke 1:4, 44 and 2:16. Once again, God is not limiting the understanding of knowing Him to older people. He wants little ones to know His Word.

How can this happen? It happens at our Family Bible times where father reads the Scriptures to the family morning and evening. Little by little the word goes into the hearts of these little ones (even when they are in the womb). In a godly home, even young children can be ready for salvation, because they are daily filled with God’s word. They can receive Christ Jesus into their lives at the ages of three and four because it is the Scriptures that prepare them for salvation. We are saved through the Word of Truth. Most of our children had a definite encounter with the Lord at the age of four years and it is as real to them today although some are now in their sixties!

Dear mothers, please be aware that your little ones can begin to KNOW God at an early age. Did you notice that word KNOW? Paul said to Timothy that he had KNOWN the Holy Scriptures since a little child. John wrote to the little children because they KNEW the Father.

Be faithful to read the Scriptures daily to your children. Watch over their souls. Speak to them much of the Father and of His character and of His great salvation. Little children want to know God. Fill them up with the knowledge of God.

I am amazed and so utterly blessed as I watch little ones in our prayer meetings with their hands raised to God and looking up in adoring worship to God. Sometimes these little ones are more into worship than the older ones. They already KNOW something of the awe of their Father God.

Remember what Jesus said in Matthew 19:14 (NLT): “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them. For the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to those who are like these children.”

 

 

LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell

EPISODE 386: CREATIVE HOSPITALITY

We are blessed again to have Pam Fields with us today. This time we talk about creative ideas for hospitality. Many young mothers are lonely in their homes. Many families feel isolated. Pam gives some very practical ideas on how to change a life of loneliness for a life of fun, adventure, and rich fellowship which all mothers so desperately need.

Announcer: Welcome to the podcast, Life to the Full, with Nancy Campbell, founder and publisher of Above Rubies, a magazine bringing strength and encouragement to families across the world.

Nancy Campbell: Hello, ladies! And guess what! I’ve got Pam Fields with me again today! Isn’t that exciting? This time, we’re going to talk together about creative hospitality. I think you've listened to me before and know that I am a lover of hospitality. It’s part of my lifestyle.

But as Pam and I often fellowship together, she’s told me stories of what they have done throughout the years. She has so many creative ideas and today we’re going to get into some creative ways that you can show hospitality as a family.

I think this will be so great, because I believe that we were born for community, born for fellowship, born for togetherness. God created us to be a communal people, a people who need fellowship with one another. In fact, God speaks so much in His Word. In the New Testament, that word koinonia means “fellowship.”

But often, we don’t really know how to do it. Some of us can be quite lonely. In fact, I think there are many young moms, who although they live today with every mod con and everything they have to help their homemaking and their mothering, they are living lonely lives. So, we want to give you some ideas of how you can change this. OK, Pam, let’s hear your thoughts.

Pam: We’re just changing tracks and jumping right in! Let’s do it.

Nancy: Oh, yes! Absolutely.

Pam: First, I think that we have to think about the difference between hospitality and entertainment. Entertainment seems to be like, “I want you to come here to my event, my home, or whatever, because I want to show you something.” Entertaining is different than hospitality, right?

Nancy: Yes. I think hospitality is a lifestyle. It’s just openness to people, isn’t it?

Pam: Yes. I think hospitality says, “Share your life with me.” Where entertaining might be, “Show your life to me. I want to show you all the shiny crystal. I want to put out all the best things.” You know what? There are times for entertaining where you want to honor somebody or have a certain event that you want to entertain people. That’s OK. But, like you said, hospitality is a lifestyle. That is the communities in which we live.

Nancy: And I believe it’s the lifestyle God wants us to live. I often think of that Scripture, Romans 1:12 where Paul, writing to the Roman believers, says: “But I may be comforted together with you by the mutual faith of both you and me.” Wow! If you really look into that Scripture, it is such a togethering Scripture. It’s a Scripture which explains our faith.

Our faith is not an isolated faith. It’s a togethering faith. Together we walk with the Lord. It’s a mutual faith. That word “mutual” is the Greek word allelon. It literally means, “one another.” Whenever you read “one another,” “pray for one another,” “love one another,” “be good to one another,” “bless one another,” it’s that word. It’s the same word that’s translated here “mutual faith.”

In other words, God wants us to walk our faith together. Isn’t that wonderful? It doesn’t say, “isolated.” It says “both.” That word “both” there, “both you and me.” It’s a you-and-me faith. I’m always great at giving the Scriptures, but Pam, you're always great at coming up with the practical ideas!

Pam: Maybe so.

Nancy: So, I want to hear some of your great ideas!

Pam: Well, we were talking earlier about how even in the Scripture, the women, when Moses was put in the water there were women all around. I do wonder what they were doing there.

Nancy: Probably their laundry!

Pam: Right! Moms don’t have a lot of free time, and they didn’t back then to just say, “We’re going to go sit down and have a mom-day. They were actively living their lives in community. They were multi-tasking. We’re great at that as moms.

I think sometimes we might think, “Oh, I don’t have time for hospitality,” because we’re thinking of it as entertainment. When you step away from thinking about it as entertainment and think about it as lifestyle, as living our lives together. You were saying, a lot of times, it’s family to family. A lot of times, in the days, that means it’s mom and children to mom and children because the husbands are often gone. There are times when it’s the whole family, but a lot of times it’s moms and children.

 I think if we get in our minds the culture of “I have to have my mom time. I have to have my breaks. I need to be separate from my children, or I’m not going to have a happy life,” or “I’m not going to have downtime,” well, I’d like to prove that wrong. Really, I think some of our great memories in my children’s lives, and lots of times it really ministered to my heart, were times when I met with other moms with children present. But I kind of feel like sometimes it’s spontaneous, and sometimes you go in with a plan.

Nancy: Yes, and that can happen, as you say, with moms and children, because we are home, but also, families with the husband as well. I think if my children were to share the joys of their childhood, they would all say that having people in our home was one of their highlights, because they got to play and interact and be with other children their own ages.

It was so much more exciting than just being with a family that’s all isolated and on its own. I think that must be a boring family to be brought up in. Oh, goodness me, we do need one another. We need the adventure of other people’s lives!

Pam: Well, I’ve heard the stories from your children. I sat down with several of them and heard their stories. And it’s not just children their own age. They carried the wisdom that they heard from other people. They watched the interactions. We learn a lot about interactions and learn how to manage relationships when we are in hospitality within our homes and within our circles.

What I think we were going to do today is kind of almost bullet points, some ideas of different things to do together. That will kind of keep us on track, because we could wax eloquently about all of this, and just have so much fun. I’ll just start with one of the things we did.

SCHOOL TOGETHER

Once a week, we went to a friend’s house and did school together. That was hospitality. Every time my family drove up to Miss Tracy’s house, we went in with our little projects and our schoolbooks we brought. We’d have a shared lunch. We would work on school. We’d sing songs, and we’d have breaks in the midst, and we’d play.

That mama was able to pour into my children’s lives, in addition to me pouring in, which was a great thing. That was fellowship for me. It was also fellowshipping children to children and that was a picture of hospitality.

Another thing we did was getting together just for science experiments. That’s one thing we did. I had a friend who had the same book we were going through. When it gets to those experiments, you just kind of have to have a day. You can do the book learning, but then, it’s like, “You know what? We’re going to get messy. We’re going to have a lot of supplies. We need to get together.  Let’s just put it on the calendar, find a friend, find a family, and do that.” We had loads of fun doing science experiments together with other families. Those are two really simple ones.

PIZZA FEAST AND ROOM SWAP

But I know that you wanted me to share about some of the really fun ones. Well, I had several children. And you know how every time a new child is born, you have to rearrange the rooms. Who’s going to sleep where? We need to put up a crib. You’re weighing your genders and how many people you put in each room.

Well, I had come to a day where I needed to do a room swap. I looked at that with what the work entailed—to take out all of the children’s things, and literally take apart beds and move them, all while I’m caring for my children. All these things. I looked at this as overwhelming and insurmountable.

I got an idea. I threw it out to the ladies in my coop. I said, “You know what? I want to do a room swap. I could use your help. I’m going to buy a bunch of pizza and have them available. Let me know if you're coming so I know how many to order. But would you come over, and would you help me swap my children’s rooms?”

We lived on an acreage. These friends came over and when they got there, children went out to play for the day. The moms divided up with two or three moms in each bedroom. They started emptying the drawers, and emptying the closets, and then disassembling beds. The whole time, we were chatting. The whole time, we shared our lives with each other and encouraged one another. That act of service encouraged me.

I remember, this is just a funny aside. My husband came home for lunch that day, and I hadn’t told him that I was swapping rooms. So, he came in and there were forty children in trees, and all these cars. He came in, and he was like, “What’s going on here?” I said, “We’re swapping rooms.” He said, “I think I’m going to go out for lunch today.” [laughter]

But by the time he came home from work at the end of the day, everybody was in a new room, and their things were put back. It was an amazing way to get something done, and experience fellowship. I know that doesn’t sound like hospitality, but it was that experience, that welcoming heart. Hospitality, even for them to show me in my home. It’s a different kind of experience.

Nancy: It’s a lifestyle of togethering. And that’s what God wants us to do, to have that fellowship and togethering, the lifestyle of the early church. In Acts 2, we read four things that the early church did. Number one was the apostles’ doctrine. But, amazingly, number two was fellowship! That was part of their lifestyle. That was lifestyle fellowship, wasn’t it?

DEEP PCLEANING TOGETHER

Pam: Right. And it may not be that you need to swap children’s rooms, but you know what? We get to do deep cleaning time and it’s like, oh wow. But wouldn’t it be great if you got maybe five friends, or two even, together? You say, “This week, I’m going to go to your house, and I’m going to help you clean while all the children play. And then the next time, we’re going to go to my house.”

And you could just work through an exchange of helping one another do a good deep cleaning. That is togethering. And I learn things when I see different people doing things in ways that I don’t do. I’m like, “That was a good idea.”

I learn a lot when I come here. I watch Nancy cook meals, and I think, “I didn’t know that.” And that is living life, when I come here for a few days, and I watch Nancy cook. That adds to my skills and better equips me to go home and mother my children. So, that’s one.

BOXCAR DAYS

And now this is a funny thing. I call this “Boxcar Days.” We implement this in the summer. We’re going into winter here, but I know there are listeners on the other side of the globe who might be heading into summer. You know that book series called The Boxcar Children? The book is about orphans, and they lived in a boxcar. These children, the older children took care of the younger ones. They had to figure out their resources and care for one another.

Many, many years ago, I came up with this idea of doing Boxcar Days. I invited my whole friend’s group. I said, “We are going to have a Boxcar Day! Read some of the books. Be familiar with what the books are. Then we’re going to act it out. So, here’s how it’s going to go. All of the children are boxcar children. They’re going to play outside for the day as if they are orphans. The older children are going to take care of the younger children. The mamas and the babies, or children who really need intensive looking after are going to stay in the house.”

What we did was, all the families would come with their box lunch, and maybe a snack to share. We kept the box lunches in the refrigerator on the porch. When the moms came in, they brought their knitting. They brought their homeschool planner for the year. They brought family letters to write. Anything they wanted to do but they couldn’t seem to have enough time in their own homes to do, because sometimes you need isolation where you need to get your mind in it. You can’t have as many distractions. I said, “Bring along a project.”

Nancy: But then, how were they thinking? All the other ladies around them would be wanting to fellowship, wouldn’t they?

Pam: You don’t want something that’s too mindfully intensive. You probably don’t want to be paying your bills on that day. But scrapbooking, knitting, adult coloring books, whatever. It was a day of relaxation for the moms, but also intentional. We would stay in the house, and we would work on whatever project, having the whole time and getting ideas from each other the whole time, sharpening one another.

Pretty soon, there was a knock on the window. It would be one of the children. One of the brave older children would knock on the window. We’d open it, and they would say, “Excuse me ma’am. We’re orphans, and we’ve run out of food. Do you have anything that you could give us?”

We always had prepared in the kitchen a bowl of watermelon, or a bag of pretzels or something. We would open the window and pass it out. I always had a table outside the window on the outside. So, we would pass out some food, put it on the table, and ask them if this would be fine for them. We hoped that they would do well until the next time we met. We closed the window, and we would go on with our fellowship, and the children would go on with their fellowship.

Nancy: They would be having such fun together.

Pam: It was an adventure!

Nancy: A place with all the things, and trees, and things to do outside. And the huts and everything.

Pam: Right! It was an adventure where they were living out a book that they had read. It was kind of silly, but even now, my oldest is 29. And I have people who came to our Boxcar Days 15, 18 years ago. They say their children still talk about it. Since we’ve moved to Tennessee, I’ve told some families about it. It’s like, “When are we going to do Boxcar Days? Are you still doing Boxcar Days at your house?” I think it’s something that can be duplicated.

Nancy: I love the idea! It’s good to hear these creative ideas and share them with one another.

TOILIET STOPS

Pam: When you have some intentional times and plans like that, because I hosted some of these events, my friends knew where I lived. I was telling you about my friend Sonya, who’s been on the podcast before.

She’d come to a lot of my events, and I remember that at one point, she had . . . We lived out in the country, and she had to go from one town to the next, running her errands. We were on the route.

When you have a large family, and somebody has to go to the bathroom, that can disrupt the whole day of errands. You have to go wait in the gas station. Are you going to take one child into the gas station and leave the rest in your car? No. Are you going to take everybody out of their car seats and go into a store? If somebody’s asleep, that ruins the whole thing.

So, very often, I’d be in the kitchen washing dishes, and I’d see Sonya pull into my driveway. She’d come up to the door and say, “We’re just here to use the toilet.” I’d say, “Come on it!” If the babies were asleep in the car, they’d stay in the car asleep. By the time she usually got out of the bathroom with the one who needed to go, the others had hopped out and were climbing in the trees. Then we had a good half-hour, 45 minutes, pass.

It just blessed our days, both of us. Then they were back in the car. Everybody got a drink of water, maybe a snack. Everybody’s gone to the bathroom. And then she was back onto her errands. It was because we had some intentional times that supplied opportunities to have the spontaneous times.

Nancy: Yes, yes. Love it!

Pam: That was another way to show hospitality. The other thing you wanted me to talk about was our teen game night.

Nancy: Before you talk about that, I don’t know where this fits in, but you were telling me about Charity, how you met her for the first time. How did that all work out?

Pam: Charity has also been on the podcast before.

Nancy: Our Charity, Sonya, and Pam are the ones in Oregon who used to put on all our Above Rubies Ladies’ Retreats in Oregon. Now they’ve all moved to Tennessee.

Pam: First, when I met Sonya, she had only been married for a few weeks I think, the first time I met Sonya. We ended up having my fifth, and her first just a few weeks apart. I was just a little further on in my mothering journey than Sonya, just a little bit older. She would ask me questions occasionally.

ONCE A MONTH COOKING SPREE

One time, we started talking about once-a-month cooking or freezer meal cooking. We made up a plan to get together and cook. We had our menu, and we had all the plans like that, and                        the ingredients. She said, “You know what? I think my friend Charity would love this. She’s got a toddler, and I think this would be good. Would you mind if I invite my friend?” I said, “Absolutely! Invite Charity.”

So, I’d never met her before, but she came to a cooking day at my house. I will always remember this. I had never met her before and she arrived there, and she tells us, “I think I might be pregnant.” She said, “Where’s your bathroom? I want to go take a quick test.” She went off and comes back and said, “Yes! Sure enough!”

That was within five minutes! I met this gal, and found out she was expecting her second baby, so it was such an exciting moment. And then, we went on to be great friends, and, yes, planned the Above Rubies retreats and all that. But the idea there was that we came to learn a skill. They came to learn how and not that I had all the knowledge, but it was time to work on a project together that would benefit all of our families. And in doing so, we created fellowship for us and fellowship for our children.

Nancy: But you still haven’t told the story of Charity, about how she was wanting to find out something.

Pam: Oh, that was Sonya.

Nancy: That was Sonya!

Pam: Yes, it was.

Nancy: I thought it was Charity.

Pam: Well, you got two stories for the price of one, I guess! Sonya and I were both at this fundraising banquet. You know, formal. It would have been an entertaining situation because we went to a banquet. It was formal, but before it started, people were mingling around. I knew Sonya but not super well.

SEWING FELLOWSHIP

I had been doing a study on some natural living, and natural health, hormones, and different things. This was a long time ago. I was a cloth diaperer, and I think she knew that we used cloth diapers because we’d had a conversation about cloth diapers before. Well, at this banquet, she walked up to me, and she said, “Do you mind if I ask you a kind of personal question?”

I, flamboyantly silly, said, “You can ask me anything you want! You want to talk about cloth menstrual pads? You want to talk about cloth diapers? Whatever, I’ll talk about it.” She laughed, and she goes, “That’s what I want to talk to you about.” I said, “Oh, really?” And she said, “Really. I’ve been looking at this and doing research about this. Cloth menstrual pads. Do you know anything about it?”

I said, “Well, you know, I have tried them. Especially post-partum. I thought they were great. If you're already doing cloth diapers, it’s not a far step to be doing that. You can just wash things up and it’s not that hard.” But then it was the cost of this. The cost to implement the plan, because you can buy them, but they’re rather expensive per item.

So, we set up a date on the calendar. I had a serger. I had my sewing machine. I can’t remember if she had a sewing machine or not. But we looked at cost-wise, and I had a pattern. So, she came over that day, and I kind of think she brought another friend too. I can’t quite remember. She came over that day, and we set up a little factory. We cut out together a bunch of these pads and then worked together to sew them. By the end of a few hours, we had enough to provide for both of our houses.

Nancy: Wonderful! And you had fellowship.

Pam: And we had fellowship. It was a good laugh. All these little, “Yeah, I remember the time we did this.” Lasting memories. [laughter]

TEEN GAME NIGIHT

Nancy: Well, back to this teen night.

Pam: OK, teen game night was also inspired by Nancy Campbell. I remember at one of our workshops, you lamented and said, “We are so focused and intentional on raising our children to prepare for motherhood, to prepare them to lead families. But where will they find spouses that have the same vision? Because not everybody has this same vision, to live this, to be mothers and parents.”

I think you suggested getting together and having some sort of event, to intentionally get young people together who were raised with the same mindset. At that point, I decided to do a teen game night. Once a month. We had two people that we knew. We didn’t advertise it on Facebook or anything. Well, it wasn’t Facebook back in those days.

But we, by invitation, invited families, my children’s friends, people in our homeschool group, or whatever, to a teen game night. We asked everybody to bring food to share. Not only was it for teenagers, but it was also for parents. I said, “Come along, and enjoy the time as parents, too.”

We have a large family. We have nine children. We were the host home, so all of mine were present. I did not suggest everybody bring eight children with them because that would have been a little chaotic, and it would have diluted the teen game night. I did ask that the families that came just bring their 13’s on up. That’s what we did. If there was a nursing infant, mom would come and sit with me with her nursing one. I’d have my nursing one, but then otherwise it was teenagers for the most part.

The parents would sit in one room, and we would talk and fellowship. The teenagers were in another room, doing games. At one point, a few of them said, “You know what? We want to give the first part of our evening back to the Lord.” So, they assigned a devotional. They took turns each month with someone leading a devotional.

Someone brought their guitar and decided they were going to start out their evening with worship and a devotional. Then they played games. We did that for probably five years, or maybe more. We had a chunk of children, and a little bit of a break, and then a younger group of children. But from that, I think that there were three to four marriages that came out of that event. Just because we offered a place and made an invitation.

Nancy: I love that! Yes, so wonderful! And I think we need to always be thinking of creative ideas and doing things together. I remember when I was raising our children. I would look out and see different needs in our church community, and in the community at large.

I remember having such a burden for widows. I did quite a few different things to reach out to widows, but I didn’t do it on my own. I talked to the other ladies in our Bible study group, our ladies’ Bible study group. “OK, let’s just do a luncheon that we can minister to all the widows, and the lonely ones in our fellowship, and in our community, and in our neighborhood.”

I remember one time we really went all out. We thought, “OK, we’re going to so bless them.” And we all cooked up the most beautiful, delectable food. We even went around the neighborhood, the homes, finding all these lonely older people, widows, and those on their own, and inviting them. We sent out cars to collect them.

I had quite a few gatherings in my home, but this particular one, I had it in our church building, because we ended up having so many. When we put out this spread, oh goodness me! We thought, “They’ll never eat this! We’ll be taking it all home.” Well, they ate it all! [laughter] It was so wonderful for them.

But we did it together and we also included our children. What I would do if there were children who could sing, we’d get them to sing together and put on some items for them so they could have some entertainment. The children were all involved. Some would get up and recite memory verses together. All the people loved to see children doing things, singing, and whatever they’re able to do.

We did times like that for the older people, and for the widows. So, we were reaching out and ministering to the needy but doing it together. We’re having fellowship at the same time. There’s something about . . . It talks in Philippians 1:5 about “the fellowship of the gospel.” Fellowship just for the sake of fellowship may not be so positive.

I think that fellowship, when you have a motive, and you have a purpose, becomes so much more powerful. When you have a purpose in doing things together, and you're fellowshipping, you're not going to gravitate to the negative. Sometimes getting together just for fellowship, and you're not actually doing something positive, can go to the negative.

I’m always aware of the Scripture in Proverbs 10:19 which says: “In the multitude of words, there wanteth not sin.” In other words, the more you talk, the more likely there is to say the wrong thing. Or you’ll start talking about people, or you’ll start into negativity. We do have to watch that with fellowship. So, I find that when fellowship has a purpose, you don’t go into that, because you're so taken up with blessing others, and the purpose, that it’s a very positive thing.

I think, dear ladies, if you are feeling lonely, maybe those young mothers who are listening, and you do feel lonely, you feel isolated, we have the blessings today of all our mod cons. We think back to women who were washing their clothes in the river. And yet, they most probably had more fun because they were all coming down to the river together. They would all be talking together, chatting, and fellowshipping. You know, just sharing their hearts. It would really fill them up. Fellowship fills you up.

So, don’t stay lonely. Think of who you can invite to your home. Invite another mother with a baby to your home for lunch. Or if it’s summertime, think of making a little picnic. Call a few mothers, and say, “Let’s go and have a picnic together with our children.” The children will play together, but you will fellowship together.

Those of you with older children, I found one of the greatest blessings for our children was inviting other families, who I knew were families of kindred spirits. We could invite them so our children could have fellowship, not just us. We could have fellowship, and the children could have fellowship. They need that.

When our children get to teens, they long to get together with their peers. My, you've got to watch who their peers are! So, you determine who their peers are. But you can determine that through hospitality, inviting the families and the young people that you want to be in your home. Just think of the ideas that will suit your situation. Ask the Lord to bring things to your mind. Be creative and go for it!

When you get into a lifestyle of hospitality, you will never have another boring moment in your life! In fact, you will never have enough time to invite all the people you want to invite to your home! I have lists of people I want to have, and I never even get through all my lists! Because there are so many people who need love and fellowship. That’s what it’s all about.

Anything to say as we close?

Pam: Well, I was just thinking what a model it is to your children when you reach out and invite. They learn to reach out and invite.

Nancy: They learn the lifestyle.

Pam: Yes. Maybe you're going to do it for yourself, but we’re also doing it in a very purposeful way, so that we can train our children to have eyes for other people. Think about the widows and think about the lonely. Loneliness is an epidemic now. Just a simple phone call, and a simple invite can really change someone’s day.

YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE LONELY

Nancy: Amen. And remember, we are never meant to live isolated. We do not have to. As you say, it’s just a phone call. It’s just thinking of some ideas, creative ideas. We can make life so exciting. I’ve talked about these things before. In fact, I did ten podcasts in a series called “God Loves Togethering.” You can look it up on the podcasts. Then I did another one. I called it “Togetherness,” and I did four podcasts on that. There is so much about this lifestyle of togetherness. So, darling ladies, never be lonely. You don’t have to be.

Well, Pam, would you like to pray for the ladies today?

Pam: Sure!

“Oh Lord, I do thank You, that You have a welcoming heart, and You put out a call for us to come to You. You receive us and love us and call us Your own. Lord, I just pray that we will have that same heart, to reach out to people, in our homes, in our neighborhoods, for Your glory, that they would find connection, and that their spirits would be filled, and that they would know Your love.

“That is why we do hospitality, to speak of the things that You have done for us, and to share those with other people, so that we can live in unity, and walk in unity, and in purpose. So, thank You, Lord, for the creativity You give us.

“I pray that You will give somebody today an inspiration of a person that they can call, a quick text they can send. Just say, “You know what? I’m thinking about you. And I would love to just say hello.” So, Lord, I pray You will equip us today, to go out and minister. In the Name of Jesus, amen.”

Nancy: Amen!

Blessings from Nancy Campbell

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www.aboverubies.org

Transcribed by Darlene Norris

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DON’T FORGET TO TELL OTHERS ABOUT THESE PODCASTS AND TRANSCRIPTS.

“LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell, Above Rubies”

DON’T KEEP THE BLESSINGS TO YOURSELF.

IT IS ENCOURAGING FOR ALL WIVES AND MOTHERS.

 

MY HEART IS FULL

I am sure you love the song introducing this podcast. Well, it’s not a new song. Serene and Pearl wrote it and recorded it many years ago, but the words are still so anointed for every mother in her home.

You can download the full song from www.aboverbies.org from the Book and music store. Go to: Above Rubies Bookstore

The following is the link for the single:

MY HEART IS FULL - Music Single from Peace All Over Me - Downloadable MP3 Format Album

Here are all the words for you:

MY HEART IS FULL

Little arms reaching for me,

Grubby fingers touch my face

And love is what I feel.

Little eyes looking at me,

Chubby cheeks burst with smiles

And joy is what I know,

Peeking in while they sleep at night,

I thank God for the gift of life,

I thank God for more that I deserve.

CHORUS.

My heart is full, my heart is full,

Why would I want for more?

When my cup overflows?

My heart is full, my heart is full,

This much I know.

Strong arms reaching for me

Circle my waist for the millionth time

And love is what I feel

Sometimes I watch him sleep at night,

I thank God that I am his wife,

And joy is what I know.

CHORUS.

Sometimes when discontent creeps into my soul

A still small voice reminds me of the ones my arms can hold.

THE TOGETHER LIFESTYLE

If you would love to hear more about Togethering, here are some more podcasts to listen to:

TOGETHERNESS:

Podcasts 104 – 107.

 

 

LIFE TO THE FULL w/ Nancy Campbell

EPISODE 385: FILLING UP YOUR LACK

Every mother needs to be fortified with certain emotional nutrients in order to mother effectively. As mothers, we must also give our children these needed nutrients.

Pam Fields joins me again today to share about five motherhood nutrients we need in our lives, and in the lives of our children. She shares how we can supplement where we are lacking and learn to give them to our children.

What kind of soundtracks are you recording for your children's future lives? Make sure you get to the end of this podcast to hear the beautiful "hugging" story.

Announcer: Welcome to the podcast, Life to the Full, with Nancy Campbell, founder and publisher of Above Rubies, a magazine bringing strength and encouragement to families across the world.

Nancy Campbell: Hello, ladies! You will be pleased to know that I have Pam Fields with me again today. I know you would have enjoyed last week’s session with Pam. Now, as you know, Pam also has her own podcast, “The Mom Next Door,” so you can look into that.

Now, Pam, I know that in this new season of your life with your children grown, getting married, and even the younger ones are growing up, you are seeing things through a different lens and you're learning new things. Well, we just want to learn right along with you. You were telling me about how you read in this book about five basic things that a mother must give to her children. I think that’s worth talking about today. Can we talk about those? Start off with the first one.

Pam Fields: Absolutely. When we start our motherhood, we’re reading a lot about what to expect when you're a mother, what to expect when you're expecting all these things. Then I felt like, for a while, “I’ve been doing this a long time. I don’t really need to read a lot of mothering books.” And there aren’t a lot for the upper years anyway.

But then, I’m in this season where I’m starting to be more, maybe, retrospective, perspective. Also, things I can learn now, I’m seeing in a different light, because it doesn’t only help me sort through my own upbringing, and my own years of mothering, but I can kind of filter it out, as just a colander, and take the things that I have learned, and choose the nuggets to pass on to the next generation of parents in my family.

As my daughters become moms, and my daughters-in-laws become mothers, if I can boil it down and give them some thoughts, some ideas that maybe could help them direct some of the things they do. Wow, what a benefit that is, to be able to pass that on.

In the last session, we talked about editing our child’s story, or even being able to speak into one another, and edit each other’s lives for the glory of God. I was reading this book called, Our Mothers, Ourselves, by Cloud and Townsend. It talks about a mother’s influence and how it really stabilizes us or not. It will lead us into our future years.

I know you always talk about this, but this was a little bit of difference, the way they said it. It really struck me. They said that five basic needs must be met by a mother.

The first one is SAFETY. That safety comes in the form of a person who is predictable, stable, and danger-free. This kind of mom creates a foundation for all of the other tasks of mothering. We kind of talked about that in that last session about being stable, about being predictable, about not losing our minds.

Without being that stable mother, then the child remains in a state of panic or anxiety. When that panic and anxiety are high, then it makes it very difficult. Maybe even at times, that child is unable to love, or to learn, because they feel from their environment so much destabilization. So, safety being the number one.

The second one, BEING NURTURED. Fuel for the soul. I know that in our home, we tend to be pretty practical, pretty efficient. We’ve got everything down to a system, a lot of the transactions. Because we’re a big family it’s a lot to manage.

I can tend towards getting things done and I forget to fuel the soul. Sometimes it’s not natural in me. I kind of have to have a list and remind myself, “Oh, I need to nurture here.” It’s within me, and it’s my nature to be practical. It’s my nature to get the list done. But we need to have the immaterial, the non-physical, functional part of relationship. Building that, nurturing relationships in order to live in fullness.

The third one on this list is BASIC TRUST. The need and ability to trust oneself in a relationship. Trust is a learned thing. Trust helps us to reach out, and to depend, and to need. When I have needs, it means it’s something that I can’t do for myself. If I have a need, I have to go to somebody else. When I see somebody else, and somebody else pours into my life, I learn that dependency is actually a good thing.

We need to feel comfortable with dependency, instead of simply thinking “I can do it myself!” I need to trust other people. That trust and that dependency on them really sets us up for being able to trust and depend on God. If I learn in the physical, in my day-to-day life, that I don’t need anybody, I can do it all myself . . . that’s also where I naturally tend to be, in a protective measure that I put into my life at a very young age, or what. I maybe just need to take care of myself, because I’m not so sure about the people around me.

But if I continue to live in that independence, then I’m not going to be able to trust God and go to Him. Isn’t that where we need to dependent upon God? As mothers, a big part of that is instilling that basic trust and letting our children understand that we can be trusted, and they can depend on us, and that being dependent is not a bad thing.

Four: BELONGING AND INVITATION. We all have a need to belong. We have a need to belong to family and to something more than just ourselves. Because God created us with a desire and a need for relationship. We can’t have a relationship by ourselves. One person is not a relationship.

When mothers love and care for their children, they make them feel wanted. That transfers onto later feelings of worth and confidence in our relationships. This is something that I’m finding. It’s something that cannot be known through an intellectual exercise.

You can tell me that you belong here. You can tell me, “Oh, you're invited. Go ahead and come.” But when I arrive at the Campbell home, if I walked in the door, and you say, “OK, get along then. Do your thing. We’ve provided the structure, the bed for you to sleep in, but you're on your own.” that is not going to give me the feeling of belonging, an invitation and welcoming that I get.

No, when I walk into the Campbell home, Nancy is up from her desk. “Well, hello! Thank you for coming! How wonderful it is to see you!” And then, there’s a big hug, and “Let me show you to your room.” All the good food that you cooked, those are the things that are welcoming to me. I have no doubt that you want me here.

Nancy: Amen!

Pam: I have no doubt as to whether I belong or not. You have exhibited to me an experience of consistently belonging and consistently being wanted. That is something. It’s not just an academic exercise. It’s an experience.

I can tell you I have a welcoming home. I can tell my children, “I love you.” I can tell my children, “I want you here.” I can tell my children all the things with my words, but to experience that, to experience that connection, and that welcoming, and the consistency, that’s a different level. This is something I am learning more of. I’ve been a mom for almost 30 years, but I’m still learning and growing in this.

Nancy: That’s the wonderful thing. We never stop learning, do we?

Pam: For sure!

Nancy: And if we do, we’re becoming very stagnant and redundant. There’s always got to be an opening to more and new.

Pam: And that’s the exciting, exciting thing, that we are constantly stepping into that. As we go through the seasons, it makes a lot of sense, because we learn things. “Precept upon precept, line upon line,” as we grow, that is.

Nancy: Yes. You know, talking about that welcoming and belonging, you were telling me another incident recently of how you felt that welcome at a friend’s back in Oregon. Remember that story?

Pam: Oh, yes, I was telling you that. We’re in Tennessee now. We’ve been here for five years. But our whole life, we lived in Oregon. Just a couple of weeks ago, I went back and called up a friend on a Tuesday. I said, “Hey, I’m in town for a couple of days. Is there any way I could stop by and visit for just an hour? I haven’t seen you in a couple of years.”

She called me right back, and said, “Oh, I would love to have you. I have an hour. I have other appointments.” I thought, “I don’t want to take too long of her time.” So, I pulled up in my rental car and got out. I looked around, and it was like, in the movies, how it’s all so beautiful. I don’t think I had seen her house with that amount of beauty. I don’t know, it just struck me, maybe because I had been reading this book.

I stepped out onto her porch, and she walked out and said hello. All it took was the “hello,” and I starting bawling. I couldn’t believe it. I was like, “Oh, my goodness, I need a tissue!” And all I’m doing is standing on the porch! She only said, “Hello,” but I thought back to all the years.

I met her when my oldest was five, so 24 years that this woman has invested in my life and brought me meals when I had a new baby. Or, honestly, she didn’t always tell me the rosy things. Sometimes she challenged me, and she told me things that maybe were difficult to hear. She challenged me. She poured into my life.

So, at that moment, I said, “I don’t know why I’m crying, except just being here! Just being here.” It was that welcome heart, and that welcome home, and knowing that I belonged, and that I held a piece in her heart. just as much as she held a piece in mine.

Nancy: So beautiful!

Pam: Well, which actually kind of brings us to this fifth and final point of the basic needs that must be met by a mother. That one is, SOMEONE TO LOVE. We have, when a baby is born, there is an object of their love. That object is mother. Mother fulfills their needs, and they begin to fall in love with Mother. Dad is probably secondary as he begins to nurture and care for them. Of course, all the siblings, and then, as you grow, there are many objects of our love.

But initially, in order to develop emotionally, and physically, and intellectually, socially, all those things, we need to experience, to give love, and to receive love. I see it with your friend Erin. As she got these little children, she adopted them. I can’t remember how old they were. But she has been able to pour into their lives. That has grown them, even physically. Physically, socially, intellectually, emotionally, spiritually, all these things.

I’ll just go on. I’m getting a little distracted. But those needs that we need, and those actions that we take, are like vitamins for our lives. You think about when a child is born, they have their body chemistry. There could be some nutrients missing. There could be some deficiencies for some reason. Or as they grow in their environment, in the seasons around them, they may acquire some deficiencies.

Whenever we think about them nutritionally, if you have a nutrient deficiency, what do we do? We supplement. We don’t just say, “Ah, well, you're deficient in that, sorry.” No, we go, “OK, we want to bring the body to wholeness, and we want to bring the body to health.” So, if there is a deficiency, we supplement it, to bring it into health.

That is something where this book has really challenged me in saying, you know what, there are places . . . Even the best mom, the mom who was super-intentional, and had done everything perfectly, well, we’re imperfect people. So, we’re always going to miss something. It’s not reasonable to think that we are going to do everything perfectly with each child, and each of their personalities, and each of their make-ups. There are going to be things that are missed.

I know, looking back, there were things in my life that were missed through my childhood. This is something where I’m learning is the concept of re-mothering. The areas, maybe where I wasn’t mothered well that I can go look for supplements. That’s what, when I found Above Rubies and somebody handed that magazine in my hands when my eldest was four months old.

READING ABOVE RUBIES RE-MOTHERED ME

Nancy: That’s a long time!

Pam: Yes, that’s a long 29 years ago! Reading the magazine began to re-mother me. It was teaching me things that were missing. As I listened to audio cassettes (in those days), and then began to attend some Above Rubies retreats, I experienced different aspects in learning of motherhood that were intellectually teaching me.

But they were also experientially teaching me, through the ministry of other women, and through the ministry of you, and of you coming up and asking about, being curious about my life, as we would drive to the airport, to send you back to Tennessee.

Nancy: Because eventually, Pam, along with some others, began to put on Ladies’ retreats up there in Oregon. We were coming up every year, and I would stay at your home. It was always a very special time. And I watched your children grow. It was so wonderful!

Pam: Yes. They all remember the times Nancy would come and read stories to them. We’d have a fantastic dinner. It was the healthiest I could try to put together. I have to say we had to make a little bit of variety, because some of my family didn’t always want to cooperate. [laughter]

But anyway, yeah. There are areas that all of us can learn to grow. When we have maybe not been given those nutrients in our homes as children, we are just not going to mature in certain areas. What I’m finding, as I read and as I study, and talk to my mentor, and my counselor, and all these places that pour into me . . .

One of the things that mothering teaches us is boundaries. Mothering teaches us boundaries, and how to respond to challenges. We talked in the last episode about a challenge of losing chickens, or different challenges in our situations. And mothering through our ministry to our children molds them into their future.

A MOTHER’S WORDS ARE THE SOUNDTRACK FOR THEIR FUTURE LIVES

One time, a few weeks ago, I was at a park, doing my thirty minutes of walking every day. I saw this young mom with a toddler, and the ground was rocky and uneven. This momma took her baby down from her hip, and pointed to grandma across the way, and said, “Go walk to Grandma. Go on. You can do it! You can do it!”

As this little one toddled over, that mama kept saying, “You can do it! You can do it!” That struck me, in the light of what I’m learning. And I wanted to go over and say, “Oh, you have no idea! You are giving your child this internal narrative. You’re teaching them that, in the future, when they have obstacles, when they have rocky roads, when that distance seems a long way to go, they’re going to have your voice in the back of their mind saying, “You can do it. You can do it. You can do it.”

And that is something. We’ve heard your daughters interviewed before, and they say, “It’s amazing to be the daughter of Nancy Campbell because she always spoke into us and encouraged us in the things that we could do. And always spoke so positively.” It made them believe that they could do anything. This is that soundtrack that they play in their minds. We want our children to play these soundtracks that remind them that they can do things.

Nancy: Yes. I love that. It makes you think of Proverbs 6, where it talks about the mother’s teaching. It says here in verse 20: “My son, keep thy father’s commandments, and forsake not the law (that is the word “teaching”) “of thy mother. Bind them continually upon thine heart, and tie them about thy neck. When thou goest, it shall lead thee, and when thou sleepest, it shall keep thee. When thou awakest, it shall talk with thee.” IT’S A SOUNDTRACK!’

So, we have to think, lovely mothers, what are the soundtracks we are recording for our children? As this mother was saving, “Yes, you can do it! You can do it! You’re amazing!” When our children hear that constantly in their ears from their mother, it becomes a soundtrack, as you said, for future years, and for when they will face incredible challenges along the way.

I often remember this story of my eldest son, Wes. They were taking out the Newsboys, the band he manages. They were tired of just having all their concerts in these big auditoriums because they took so much of the money they would make from the concert. It would just have to be given back on this, and this, and this, and that.

So, they said, “OK, we’ll design our own big tents!” They did that. They designed these tents, and it was like going out with a circus. They had to take everything. They had to take the food stores, and the toilets, and they had to take everything with them. But unfortunately, they got out there in Texas, and incredible windstorms came and tore these tents to pieces. It happened on more than one occasion, until they actually lost millions.

I remember saying to my son one time when he came in, I said, “Oh, Wes, how are you getting on with all these problems out there?” He just looked at me. He said, “Mom, I don’t have problems, only challenges.” He worked through those challenges, but that was his whole understanding. Problems meant nothing to him. They were just a challenge along the way.

Pam: That was the soundtrack in the Campbell home that you have put in your children from the beginning. And all your grandchildren know it. I’ve talked to your grandchildren. What do they know? “A good man’s never stuck!”

Nancy: That’s right. That came down the generations.

Pam: It is. They continue to play that.

Nancy: Yes! They do! It’s amazing. That was a phrase that my father constantly said as we were growing up. To himself, with any challenge that he faced. “Wow! How am I going to do this?” NO! “A good man’s never stuck!” He got it from his father. My father would say it, and then it came out of us children, his children. My generation all said those words. Now the grandchildren are saying it. And I guess the next generation will too! It just carries on. It’s a soundtrack. We can make positive soundtracks or negative soundtracks.

Pam: That’s true. And, you know, this one thing I’m finding . . . A lot of my friends are my age. It makes sense. We come to an age where we’re like, “Ah, things didn’t exactly turn out for some of our children, or even for ourselves, the way we thought.” Sometimes it’s not all bad. It’s different. It’s different than we thought.

But we do start, I think, now in our 50’s, we are getting to be a little more contemplative of why and what and how. I have a group of children who are grown adults, and then I have younger ones still in the home. And I think if I could stop and think about areas, and the way that I mothered these older children, and was it any different? Or is it any different that the way I do the younger ones? I have to say yes. As we learn and grow in our motherhood, we decide what hills to die on.

Nancy: Exactly.

Pam: And then, sometimes I do admit, I’m just more tired. That determines, sometimes, where I’m going to put my effort. I have grandchildren now, and I have all these things to juggle in a different way. One of the things, as I look back on these basic needs to meet as a mother, I have to evaluate. OK, what did I do really well? And in what areas could I have done better?

For me, on this list, nurture is one of those ones. I said, “I probably could have done a better job nurturing.” That was hard for me. I needed almost a list, like these are the things. The Power of Motherhood, that book, I got it right after it came out. It was about the time my first one was born.

I needed that manual for motherhood because when I entered into my mothering, I just was not quite prepared. I did not have the tools I needed to go into motherhood. That taught me things, but again, we’re thinking that almost academically it taught me things. So, then I transferred over academically. These were the things I needed to do. I look back, and nurture is not an academic thing. It’s an experiential thing.

We were talking earlier about an experience I had with one of my daughters. I’ll tell you this: I have a fantastic mentor in my life right now. I meet with her almost every week. We’ve been meeting for ten months to study the book of Ephesians, and we are only to Ephesians 5, because we find all these areas to stop and linger and work through.

One of the things that she told me when she started mentoring me, she was like, “You’re not a hugger, are you?” And I said, “Oh, no! I am not a hugger! It’s just tying a knot in me. I’m not really . . . I could do without it.” She said, “We’re going to change that.” I thought, “Well, I’m not interested in changing that, but if you say I need to, I trust your wisdom. But I know, within me, that is hard.”

So, every time I meet with her, at the end, she’s like, “Come on, give me a hug!” And then she’s sending me articles. You need to have a 20-second hug every day and different things. She’s always challenging me. That’s one area, I think. Looking back, I hugged my children, but I did that because I read it in a book. It might have been The Power of Motherhood. It might have been a different one. I don’t remember. But I cognitively knew, “Hugging is good for your child. So, I need to hug my child.”

And I remember, down on my knees, or up on the couch, just hugging them. And not quite thinking, when to miss it over, but also not feeling it as much as I was committed to doing it, because I knew it was right for them. I knew they were feeling it. I knew it was making the endorphins react for them to respond to my hug. But it was very much a cognitive effort for me.

And then, as they grew into teenagers, I really don’t hug them as much. I don’t cuddle them on the couch as much. I don’t. That’s an area where I need to work on, and I need to refine. But it’s kind of awkward to go back and fix it. It’s like, how do you start this? I have not been a hugger. How do I do this?

Well, we had an experience a few, I don’t know, months, weeks, whatever it was. I have a daughter who is living on her own. One day she called me, and she said “I’m not feeling safe to pull into my driveway right now. I’m just going to keep driving. Will you talk to me while I drive?” And I said, “Absolutely. You don’t feel safe pulling in your driveway, keep driving. The Holy Spirit speaks to us. Keep driving.”

Pretty soon, she said, “OK, I’m here.” I said, “OK, you're home. Are you going to go in now? Everything’s fine? You feel better?” She said, “No, I’m at your house.” I said, “Oh, well, come on in.” And by that time, it was, I don’t know, close to 11 o’clock at night. I was in my pajamas. I was in my bed.

For a little bit of reference, we’ve had some challenges in our relationship, really, mostly on my part, my hard-heartedness, and stubbornness, and rigidity. Some of those things, I just could have done better as a mom. So, we’ve been challenged, a little bit, in our relationship. In that, I want to make things better, but I don’t know how. It’s awkward.

But at this moment, my daughter ended up coming to our house because the boogeyman could have been at her house. So, she came to our house. And she comes in to talk to me. She just starts relaying her day, and on and on, just talking and talking. And then pretty soon, she said, “You know,” talking about her walk with the Lord.

She said, “You know, I used to physically feel God hug me. I could feel His arms around me, like physically. I knew He was there. I don’t physically feel His hugs anymore. It’s really kind of strange, because when I spent time with Him, I could feel His hugs, but I just haven’t felt that for a long time.”

I said, “You know what? This is really interesting to me, because I have been learning more about hugs. This is an area in my life where I realized I have really failed you as a mom. I should have hugged you more when you were young. I’m kind of wondering, could it be, that you physically felt God hug you . . . because I wasn’t doing it?”

This is where I’m talking about relational vitamins. There are vitamins we need to grow, and to have wholeness. If we don’t have those vitamins, they need to be fulfilled somewhere. I said, “I wonder if the Lord was fulfilling that, and He was physically . . . You’re feeling His hugs because I was not giving you that essential vitamin. I’ve been learning that I need to do better at that. I’ve been learning about hugs. I’ve been reading articles about hugs. And I kind of think I’m supposed to hug you right now. What do you think? Do you think I need to hug you right now? How would you feel about that?”

And she said, “Yeah, I do. I want a hug.” I said, “Well, how do we do that?” It was just awkward as it could be. I thought, “How do we do that?” I said, “Why don’t you come here?” Here I am, laying down in my pajamas on the bed, and she just folded into me. We both sobbed. It was a beautiful moment, and I think we both recognized that.

A little while in, I said, “You know what? I think it’s safe to go home now.” She kind of giggled, and she said, “Yeah, I was thinking the same thing. I think God wanted me to drive past my driveway, and keep driving, because He wanted me to end up here. I think He wanted us to have this moment together.” It was like, I didn’t know how to navigate that, but God sent her to my door and sent her to an opportunity to fix the things that I had gotten wrong for so many years.

I’m now, at this point, I need to be humble. I need to recognize that and recognize I didn’t get it all right. And as right as I got everything, as intentional as I was as a mother, I was missing something. That was a challenge to me. That is something, when I stepped up to the door of my friend in Oregon, I think the reason it touched me so much is because she had filled a vitamin, an essential nutrient that I had been missing in my life, and in my motherhood.

When I come to your home, you energize me with an energy shot, of a vitamin water energy shot, to make me more whole, and let me step into the calling that God has for me. I would just challenge all of us to ponder, “Lord, what was I missing? I want to hear what I was missing, and I want to step into it. I want You to lead me, to heal any relationships that are broken, and to be able to nurture those who I need to nurture differently. But Lord, also sending people to teach me, and allow my heart to be ministered and re-mothered.”

We were mothered once, but we need to continually be re-mothered by our community, and the people around us, to bring us into this place where we can walk in the fullness of His calling.

Nancy: Yes. Thank you, Pam. Thank you for sharing that beautiful story about your daughter. That was so beautiful.

“Father, we just come to You at the end of this podcast again. Thank You, thank You for Your patience, and Your longsuffering, as You continue to show us Your ways, and teach us Your ways. Help us to be open to listening to Your voice. We thank You that You have promised that the meek You will teach Your ways. Lord, we want to have a meek spirit, to hear Your voice.

“I pray again today for all the precious wives and mothers listening. Bless them today. Pour out Your Spirit upon them and lead them more and more into all that You have for them. I ask in Jesus’ Name. Amen.”

Blessings from Nancy Campbell

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Transcribed by Darlene Norris

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