Writing about parenthood, the great preacher and writer, J. R. Miller says: “Duties cannot be transferred.” I happen to agree with him, although many modern Christians would not.Why do we think we know better than God? Why do we think that we have a better plan for our lives that the one who intricately, wonderfully, and marvelously created us?
God, in His perfect design, for “all His ways are perfect,” created a father and a mother to bring children into the world and to care for them in this world. He gave each one distinct roles to fulfil. Each brings their own strengths to the parenting career. Many want to change the roles because of convenience. The wife wants to take on the role of provider which means she must give her children to someone else to watch. And yet no guardian, no matter how loving, can ever be in tune to the innermost needs of her child like the mother.
Sometimes a mother can earn more money than her husband, so she goes to work while her husband stays home with the children. This is a role reversal and not planned by the God who created us.
But you say, “I know fathers who are great stay-at-home-fathers to their children.” That may be so, but they cannot be a mother no matter how they try. God has put within women a maternal anointing that men don’t have. Yes, men love their children. They have a strong instinct to protect their children. They want to provide for their children, but they weren’t created to “mother” their children but to “father” them.
Babies and toddlers need the comfort of their mother’s breasts. Breastfeeding is tied up with motherhood. Scientific studies reveal that the more frequently a mother breastfeeds her baby the more motherly and nurturing she becomes. These hormones release mothering hormones and a man does not have the same abundance of these hormones that God gives to a mother to nurture.
God has also put within women a love for home, unless of course it is brainwashed out of her by our education system, the media, and the deception of our progressive society. A man is not cut out for the finer touches of the home and to making a home feel like a home. He was created to go out and to provide. To work hard for his family.
To get back to our original statement, I do concede that men and women can transfer their roles to a certain extent, but only at the expense of God’s ultimate blessing for the family. God intends fathers and mothers to fully embrace the way He created them and to reveal these strengths to their children which they pass on from one generation to the next.
Children who grow up in a family where the mother works and the husband stays home with the children will have a distorted understanding of God’s definitive plan. They will be confused and deceived. And what happens in the next generation? Will they think it normal to carry on this pattern until we have a society of men at home and women in the work force? God forbid.
Be blessed today in your God-given role of mothering,
Nancy Campbell
Painting: The First Stitch.
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What do you do when someone hurts you or says something that cuts deep into you like a knife? How do you feel when it is someone very close to you, perhaps your husband? Maybe you retreat into a shell with self-pity and bitterness. Or you shout and yell. You want to pay them back.
A Facebook question popped up on my Facebook awhile back: “What do yo think about having a male friend apart from your husband? Vice versa too? Can it be a purely platonic relationship?”
I love this old painting. I just Had to share it has it brings back such memories. This is how we used to roll a hank of yarn into a ball. My father often held the yarn for my mother as she rolled the wool into a ball. We children also had to take turns of holding the wool for her. This dear old husband has drifted off to sleep. But if he was awake, he would be holding his hands in place and keep the wool tight to make it easy to roll without getting tangled. Is there anyone else old enough to have these memories?
David said in Psalm 4:6: “There are many who say, “Who will show us any good?” In other words, ”Where can I find true happiness?” Some look for happiness in material things, pleasures, entertainment, prestige, or the favor of people around them. David answered his own question. He replied that he found his happiness in knowing the presence of God and His friendship. The GW translation says: “Let the light of your presence shine on us, O LORD.” It is only God who can truly satisfy the longing and deepest desires of our heart. You cannot find it in “things.” You cannot even find it in your closest friend, your husband. Only in God.
The devil wants our children. He will take the souls, minds, and hearts of our children if we let him. He wants to take them down his road of destruction. We cannot give him an inch or he takes a mile. We must be fierce guarders!
Can you imagine what the world would be like if God’s people had not limited their families? The land would be filled with righteousness and the image of God. We would have a landslide for righteousness at voting time. 
I hope you picked up some ideas from yesterday’s post, BLESS YOUR FAMILY. Here are a few more ideas for you today.
I wonder what you have planned for your family meal table tonight? It’s good to hink of different ways you can bless and encourage your husband and children. One nice idea is to get your children to write a card to their father with all the great things they love about him. They can also draw a picture and make it very special. If you have little ones who cannot write yet, get them to draw a picture for daddy. You can then put them by his plate when he comes to the evening meal. During the meal he can read them aloud. The children will be excited to hear him read them and your husband will be blessed.
Have you, or are you planning to have a “Color Night” at your table. Yesterday I shared about a Red Color Night. Today, I am sharing a testimony from Val Stares about when she planned a “Green Color Night” at her table. Val Stares is the Director of Above Rubies in Australia. Val has been with me in the vision of Above Rubies from its very inception when we began in New Zealand over 43 years ago. She and her family moved with us to Australia and after 10 years when we moved on to live in USA, she took over the managing of Above Rubies in Australia. Val is now a great-grandmother like me, and this story happened a number of years ago. But I am sure you will enjoy it.
We talked yesterday about making every meal a love affair. This won’t just happen. You need to take time to think about your family meal table. Think about creative things you can do to bless the children. When raising our children, I tried to do something different at the meal table at least one night a week. One of the things our children loved when growing up were COLOR NIGHTS. For example, I would choose a color and put up a notice:
There used to be an old saying: “Children should be seen and not heard” I don’t agree with this statement. I believe the table is place for not only eating, but fellowship. Food and fellowship go together. They are TWINS.
What’s the atmosphere like in your home? What’s it like at meal times? Do you gather together around your table? Talk and fellowship together? Open God’s Word and pray together? Do you do dishes and clean up the kitchen together? Or is Mom left with the mess and everyone goes their merry way?
Of course you do. When you become a mother you can hardly grasp how you can love someone so much.
Are your family mealtimes often chaotic? Sometimes you want to throw up your hands in despair! The following are some ideas that I have found helpful in maintaining togetherness at our family meal table. Even as you establish these ideas, don’t despair if everything is not perfect. It takes time. But as you keep training you will eventually reap the fruit of glorious times around your table.
“You are our letter, known and read by everyone” (2 Corinthians 3:2). In our homes and everywhere we go, we should reveal the character of Jesus for people are reading us. And how do they read us? Through our faces. Let’s not hide the glory of God.
Oh how true. To gather family and friends around your table is one of the most enjoyable things in life. How wonderful to share, fellowship, discuss, tell stories, laugh, and even cry together. My favorite times of every day, especially as we end our meals with reading God’s Word and praying together.
Are you off to church today? We need one another more than ever, don't we?
One of the names of our God is the “God of all comfort” (2 Corinthians 1:3). Did you notice that He is the God of ALL comfort? We need God’s comfort in different ways as we face different situations in our lives. But there is nothing that is too painful for God’s comfort.
Have you thought much about salutations? They have power to affect people’s lives. What do you say when you greet your husband each morning? I am sure you start with the wonderful words, “I love you.”