I believe that one of the most powerful helps in raising our children, especially our teens, is to find godly peers for them. I know this is not always easy, but I would encourage you to pray earnestly about this and do all in your power to facilitate good friends for your children.
When children are nearing their teens, and in their teens, they have a great need for friendships. And they are very guided and influenced by their peers. In fact, you can be the most amazing parents in the world, but if your children get into the wrong company, they can often go the wrong way.
We raised our children on Proverbs 13:20: “He that walks with wise men shall be wise; but a companion of fools shall be destroyed.”
It’s so great if you can find a good church fellowship with pro-family families. If children establish friendships with children from godly families when they are young, they will have those friends as they go into their teens.
We encouraged friendships with families with kindred spirits. We enjoyed loads of hospitality in one another’s homes. Our children stayed with them, and their children stayed with us. Of course, you can’t do this unless you know the family through and through. Hospitality is a wonderful way to cement these friendships.
One family, a fellow pastor with Colin in our church in New Zealand, had boys similar ages to ours. The boys became like family and today, even though they are in their fifties and living in different countries, they are still great friends and constantly in touch with one another.
Our grandchildren had it even better. Our daughter’s families have grown up here together on the hilltop and their children have grown up together. Each family was unique and established their own patterns, but the children saw one another every day of their lives. It was such a keeping power. They didn’t need to be lured into the spirit of the world as they enjoyed so much adventure with one another.
Most of them are married now and raising a new generation (our great-grandchildren) who will enjoy this same lifestyle.
Recently one of Pearl’s married sons came to her and said, “Mother, you were a great mother, but I have to say that it was growing up on the hilltop with all my cousins that was my greatest keeping power from the ways of the world.”
Here are some more Scripture for you to teach your children. It’s good to make these Scriptures memory verses for your children. Print them in big letters and pin them up on the wall for them to see.
Exodus 23:2: ¨Thou shalt not follow a multitude to do evil.” Do you notice that it says to “not follow.” Malachi 2:11, 12 tells us that the follower will receive the same judgment as the initiator. We must not be followers. We must teach our children not to be followers.
Another translation says that the tempted will receive the same judgment as the tempter! It’s not the temptation that is evil but yielding to the temptation.
I love the old hymn which we sang at our family devotions the other morning:
Yield not to temptation, for yielding is sin,
Each victory will help you come other to win;
Fight manfully onward, dark passions subdue,
Look ever to Jesus, He will carry you through.
Proverbs 1:10, 15: “My son, if sinners entice thee, CONSENT THOU NOT . . . My son, WALK NOT thou in the way with them, REFRAIN THY FOOT from their path.”
Proverbs 4:14, 15: “ENTER NOT into the path of the wicked, and GO NOT in the way of evil men. AVOID IT, PASS NOT BY IT.”
Here are some other translations:
Berean Study Bible: “My son, if sinners entice you. DO NOT YIELD TO THEM.”
New Living Translation: “My child, if sinners entice you, TURN YOUR BACK ON THEM.”
May God bless you and help you in finding good friends for your children.
Many blessings from Nancy Campbell
P. S. One of the wonderful ways to find good friends for your teens is to come to Above Rubies Family Retreat where you can meet up with other families of like mind. We love it when families bring all their unmarried children and even their married children. By the way, Colin and I met at a Christian family camp, so we believe in this idea! Go to the website, www.aboverubies.org to check it out.
Other Scriptures to reference: Psalm 1:1; 34:14; 97:10; Proverbs 14:7; Amos 5:15; Romans 12:9; and 1 Corinthians 6:18.