MY HUSBAND’S HELPER
Part 4 (The Strengths I Bring to my Marriage and Family)
“The tongue of the wise useth knowledge aright: but the mouth of fools poureth out foolishness”
Today we continue Point 4 about how God has given women a gift with words.
4. STRONG TO SPEAK continued.
A Soft Answer
God’s Word is so wonderful. It teaches us exactly how to operate the tongue. In times of turmoil or argument Proverbs 15:1 tells us: “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.” Soft, tender, and gentle words have far more power than loud, angry words. In all situations, Shakespeare’s words are a good testimony of a woman: “Her voice was ever soft, gentle, and low, an excellent thing in woman.”
We each know that nagging destroys a marriage relationship. The big thing is NOT TO NAG! Once again, the Bible reminds us:
Proverbs 21:9 (HCSB): “Better to live on the corner of a roof than to share a house with a nagging wife.” Repeated in Proverbs 25:24.
Proverbs 21:19: “It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.”
Proverbs 27:15 (HCSB): “An endless dripping on a rainy day and a nagging wife are alike.”
Don’t Open Your Mouth
However, although we love to talk, there are times when we should not open our mouths at all. When you feel mad and only have negative words to spout off to your husband (or children), keep your mouth shut. You’ll regret the words you speak.
What did Jesus do when he was threatened, ridiculed, and reviled? He didn’t say one word (Isaiah 53:7; Matthew 26:62, 63; 27:12-14; Mark 4:61; 15:5; John 1'9:9; and 1 Peter 2:23)! To be a true helpmeet to our husbands, we must learn when to speak and when not to speak. We must train our mouth to submit to our will.
Speak for Righteousness
However, we have not been given a voice to hide in seclusion. We come into our marriage and family to be a voice for all that is holy, righteous, good, and lovely. We abhor evil and cleave to the good (Romans 12:9). We hate every evil way (Psalm 119:101). Therefore, we speak out against evil. We will not tolerate that which God hates. Rather than tolerate evil, we tremble at God’s Word. Therefore, we do not keep our mouths quiet when we must speak for righteousness (Proverbs 31:8, 9; Isaiah 58:1; and Ephesians 5:11). We fear God rather than the praises of people.
5. STRONG IN COMPANIONSHIP
Your husband needs your friendship. You were created to be his companion and he chose you to be his best friend. Titus 2:4 commands the older women to teach the young women how to love their husbands. The Greek word is philandros meaning “to be friendly and affectionate.” It’s not enough to know that you love your husband. He doesn’t know what you think. You must show it to him. Cultivate being a cuddly, kissy, and physically-touching wife.
Take every opportunity to show him physical affection. Write notes to him in the most surprising places. Think of creative ways to remind him of your love. It’s so easy to forget about this during your daily grind and the overwhelmingness of life. That’s why I’m reminding you. We need fresh reminders every day. Caress him when he comes near you. Hold his hand when driving in the car. What else are you going to do?
This is how you be a helper to your husband. It does wonders for him.
Blessings from Nancy Campbell
“Dear Father, please help me to be a true helper to my husband. Show me how to love him more freely and affectionately each day. Help me to make his life complete, for this is your will for me. Amen.”
I am thinking of new ways to show affection to my husband each day.