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Daddy's Little Girl

One day as I walked in the park, I watched with tears of joy as a young father cuddled his little daughter.  She snuggled up and looked adoringly into his eyes, then relaxed and, reaching up to touch his face, fell asleep in his arms. Thank you Father for a little girl who can be "Daddy's little girl".  How precious is the relationship of father and daughter.

I continued on a little further and pondered this precious relationship I now knew with my Father God. I thought about the women whose paths I'd crossed and how many of them had a deep need to come into an intimate relationship with our Heavenly Father. How many of them had been robbed of the true perception of Father God. How many had been robbed of their innocence and trust as small girls, whether by a father, uncle or friend. The violation of innocence by an "older man" seems to produce the same effect  - a distorted perception of Father God.

I have also noted in some cases of the dysfunctional family (and not necessarily sexual abuse) that where a father defaults in his responsibility to develop love and trust in his children, there is a distortion of the father-child-relationship … leaving the child to search the wrong places to fill that void for a Daddy to love and trust.

I remembered my own childhood and how my "father image" was so distorted.  As a teenager the word "father” was a source of pain and fear. Deep hurts like ugly, unhealed wounds would tearfully and painfully surface.

I thought about the years of my childhood and adolescence that were stolen by the pain of abuse, both sexual and physical. How can anyone understand what it is that causes a young woman to blame herself and to feel so unworthy and so unclean?  I did not understand the source of the pain and the longing I had deep within - a longing to be loved, accepted, needed for myself, always searching for something to fill that place, never trusting, always afraid!  With a driving compulsion I searched, only to be used and hurt again.  What was it I longed for?

The thing I longed for but feared was a Daddy to care.  In the light of my past, how could things ever be right in my life?

Then I met my saviour, Jesus. He led me gently to His Father.  At first the old fears seemed to block the way.  I was afraid again and mentally struggled with the painful images of childhood, but little by little the healing came deep within through the Word and the Spirit. Over and over He would speak words of gentle love, "I have loved you with an everlasting love, you are mine, you are precious, you are the apple of my eye, I love you, I do not condemn you.” On and on He caressed me with gentle words of love.

I started to respond to my Heavenly Father. Here was Someone whom I could trust at last!  Can you imagine how sweet those words are to someone who has such deep needs? One day in prayer, I saw myself on my Father's lap, looking into His face, reaching to Him as He held me close.  "Daddy," I whispered.  The words came from my lips and my heart. I knew at last the pain of the past years and lost childhood were over.  Never again would my past life haunt me.

In the years that have followed, there have been challenging moments, but as I have grown in my intimate relationship with my Lord, I have learned that my dignity, my worth and my security come from union with Him.  I am the person He created me to be. My perception of my Heavenly Father is complete.  He is everything I have ever dreamed of - and much much more!  And what is even more beautiful than that, is that I know I have completely forgiven the one who caused my pain and I can love through the Love that is now dwelling in my heart by the Holy Spirit.

The truth is that it is Satan who comes to rob, steal and destroy, and to rage among the lambs. He uses people but he is the one who has set himself to try to destroy womanhood. Our wonderful Heavenly Father paid the price through His precious and only Son Jesus, not only to deliver us from the horror and results of abuse but also to fully restore our womanhood.

Truly God is my Abba Father, "Daddy God"!   Because of my intimate friendship with Him, I am complete as a woman, wife, mother and "Nanny" that He created me to be.  I live in victory over "something" that happened in my past. The future is His and mine together.

“Thank you my "Daddy God." I'm your little girl!”

BERYL SPENCER

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